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About




Hello Destructoid. I play a decent amount of video games and spend just as much time (if not more) reading and writing about them. Why? Thats a good question. I'll have to get back to you on that one. In the meantime, i'd like to play some games and read and write about them.

I've been doing a small amount of blogging in the recent months and I recently decided that if i'm going to be doing that, I might as well do it here where someone might actually read it. Who am I kidding? Noone will actually read it.

I don't really enjoy writing, I do however get an amazing satisfaction from spell check. I'm old school. I remember the day I got my NES like it was yesterday, 1985. Well, actually I remember the year better than the day. Give me a break I was only 5. Do you remember when you were 5? Ok then.

Moving on. My next console was the Sega Genesis. Some of my best memories of that era revolve around the "beef" between the Genesis owners and the Super Nintedno owners. This wasn't some bullshit make believe beef like the "East Coast/ West Coast" beef was. This was real beef. You know, the type were "ya mom's ain't safe to walk the streets". I still have the "SEGA" tattoo across the belly to prove it.

Next was the Sega Saturn. (i did have the 32x and the Sega CD but those are hardly worth talking about as far as I'm concerned.) The Saturn was cool. I remember being rather impressed by the graphics and falling in love with Tomb Raider. Not because of the girl like some of you perverts but because it was just amazing. Somewhere around this time frame I was feeling a little bit of envy towards the Nintendo 64 guys. I don't know why I got off the Nintendo side of things, it wasn't intentional. I stepped into the Sega universe with nothing but the fondest memories of my Nintendo days. But alas, what can one do when receiving such things as gifts. Either way, I was quite happy with my Sega Saturn. That was until a new friend introduced me to his Playstation. (Although that might have sounded gay, by no means was it meant to.) He showed me how much better Tomb Raider looked, and how much better Tekken was compared to anything I had on the Saturn at the time.

This is where it all changed. I was sold. I needed a PlayStation. Even if it meant doing the unthinkable. Getting rid of the Sega Saturn.

And so it was done.

Moving into the the next generation, my recollections aren't quite as clear. I remember having a PS2 and I remember buying my Dreamcast. I don't know which came first but I know the guy who lived upstairs from me could burn those Dreamcast games onto cd's and they would play like a dream. I know he would give me 5 games for 5 dollars, and I know he seemed to have them all.

Could the PS2 do that? I suppose I could use Google and find an answer to that, but I'm trying to prove a point. What is the point? The point is SEGA KICKED ASS and they were steamrolled by SONY! That actually doesn't prove that point in any way, but you know what I mean.

Many years pass

Despite having my beloved Sega Dreamcast tucked away safely in a bed of pirated discs in my closet I purchased my 2nd PS2. This may have had something to do with the fact the DC had long been discontinued by this point.

Perhaps an XBOX would have been a good choice at this point? I was hardly aware of what was REALLY going on in the video game world by this time. I was on the outside looking in. Clueless. Much like I am today. The only difference is, I now have an XBOX 360.

It's definitely had a huge negative impact on my life. My wife moved out. My kids never answer the phone when I call and I cant seem to keep a job for more than a few weeks.

Just Kidding. I'm actually a pretty cool guy and I'm just working on finding the perfect balance of time between playing COD4 and bangin' super hot models.

Cerealy.
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In case you werent aware, the resident evil 5 demo became available for Japan today. I am dl'ing it now and wanted to share it with every one who wants to see it as bad as I do.

here are the instructions I followed. If you have a few minutes and dont want to wait for an american demo, here is your chance.

Here’s how to get the download via planetxbox360:

* Go here: http://www.passport.net/
* Sign up a new account, Click “No, sign me up for a free MSN Hotmail e-mail address”
* Pick JAPAN for your country, pick Tokyo-to as your Prefecture 150-2345 for your zipcode
* Keep going, and then have it set you up with a @hotmail.com address.
* Go to your 360, and create a new profile. Log in using your hotmail address on your 360, and it should set it to Japan.
* If this is less than your 4th trial account you get gold free, so select yes when it asks you. (the RE5 demo requires Gold standing)

How to download the demo from Japanese XBox:

* Login to your Japanese Gold account
* Once logged in press the xbox button in the middle of your controller to bring up the “old” dashboard
* Navigate to the market place tab, then go to Game Marketplace
* From Game Market place navigate all the way down to ALL GAMES
* Then from ALL GAMES. Then go to “ALL” (instead of trying to understand japanese alphabet). Then just scroll through all the games until you get to BioHazzard 5 (it should be 270 of 40
* Once you get to BioHazzard 5, the first screen should say “Get Demo” and viola you are downloading the demo. Should be like 472 MBs.








Now I know this is absurd. I know I will lose all of my cred as a gamer after admitting this, but I had to cheat on some of the puzzles in Braid. Don't get the wrong idea, I tried. I spent a great deal of time on some of the puzzles and just could'nt seem to get them. I enjoyed the game, and truly enjoyed the feeling you get from collecting a new puzzle piece, but there comes a time when enough is enough.

Sure, not everyone is as good at certain things, but I was able to beat Portal, and all of the advance Portal stages without cheating. So whats the difference? Whats interesting is after I would watch a video it was never a feeling of, "oh, how did I miss that?". It was more like, "holy shit! I'm glad I just looked that up cause I would have NEVER figured that out."

I'm glad that even after watching a video for a piece here and there it did'nt ruin or cheapen the experience for me. I did it right at the time where I needed to progress or I may have been turned off and not finished the game. Perhaps I could have started the game over and been able to figure them out on my second play through? I guess we will never know.

Looking back, I think part of the problem was not fully understanding a few things at the time I needed to. For example, you may come across a puzzle and need to use a technique that was never introduced up to that point. Sure, some people might realize that if you are standing close to the pit of spikes and your shadow jumps across you will be able to get the key like some sort of hand off. But I never even thought that was an option and spent hours trying to figure out how to get the key up on the ledge.



I don't know if I would have ever tried that technique not knowing it was an option.

At the end of the day, I did enjoy the game and would recommend it to anyone who has'nt played it yet and is looking for a challenge.

So, how about you "hardcore gamers"? ;) Did anyone else need help? Don't be shy, for we shall unite and strengthen in numbers. Jk. But seriously, don't be gay. ;)








This is what my neighbor says to me any time he is describing something that has to do with his PS3.

Apparently picking up a used copy of Assassins Creed was a good move because, "dog, its a blu ray, dog." According to him, "a blu ray cant be scratched or whatever, dog.". Well, that is interesting. It sounds like an amazing advancement in disc technology when you can create a disc that cant be scratched.

I wish someone could make cd's and dvd's that couldnt be scrathced as well. Well, one can dream.

In describing to me how awesome GTA4 is I learned that part of its awesomess is because, "Dog, its a blu ray, dog.". Oh? that is interesting, my copy of the game sucked, and now I know why. It is on a DVD.

A while back my neighbor had a 360 as well as his PS3. He lost interest in the 360 and sold it. I thought that was pretty odd so I asked him how he could get rid of his 360? Of course we know his answer, "Dog, why do I need that, when its not even a Blu Ray dog?"

How could I argue with that?

My neighbor isnt the only PS3 owner I know who is blown away by the fact the discs his games come on are called "blu rays". A co worker of mine loves them as well. The similarities between these 2 guys dont end there. Another thing they have in common is they are both the proud owners of old SDTV's. Neither one of them could tell you the difference between an HDMI port or Port Everglades and neither one of them uses their PS3 to watch movies.

Who needs to know about any of that when its a blu ray dog??















I have not finished NG2 just yet, but so far I have to say the game is better than DMC4 imo. I wasnt sure if it would be but it became very apparent after the first couple of levels.

Devil May Cry 4 was a cool game. Using Nero to destroy enemies was pretty fun and the graphics were great. The thing is there were lots of times when I played that game when it just wasn't very fun. People say the NG2 cam is off but I like it way better than the fixed cam in DMC4. To be honest I don't think I have had any issues with the NG2 cam.

The levels in DMC4 were confusing and always seemed to frustrate me. I don't think there was a single level that I didn't get lost on. Half the time I would think I was moving forward only to end up in the same place I started... "huh?"

The action was great, but in DMC4 you maybe faced 3 or 4 enemies at a time where in NG2 it seems like 10 or more at times. Maybe if you could use Nero in NG2 you would be able to have the kind of fun that you can with RYU. That is a bad mother fucker there. Between running on walls, jumping up walls and slicing through enemies like a turkey on thanksgiving with an electric carving knife, NG2 is just more fun!



^

look at that.

Another thing about DMC4 was the lame ass puzzle attempts. If anyone remembers the level where you had to hit those spinning gyros into the, uh, I don't know what the hell they were but man was that retarded. Lets take a game thats best part is its combat and hide it between lame ass puzzles and horribly designed levels.

In NG2 its pretty straight forward. You walk up, you fight lots of enemies, kill them and fight more, which is good because it is awesome! Thats what I want to do! I don't want to move statues around from one colored tile to another.

If you haven't seen NG2 combat in action you really need to. In fact, seeing it wont be enough, you need to do it yourself. It is amazing what you can do to your enemies in that game. Not only is what you can do amazing, but the amount of attacking options is incredible. The variety between weapons is greater than I expected and allows you to mix it up even more than an extendable arm and a gun. (what a pussy ass gun that was by the way)

NG2 is the only single player game I have ever played that I get killed in as often as I do in a Call of Duty 4 Deathmatch, and I love it. If you are like me, you skip that kill cam the instant it pops up so you can respawn as fast as possible. Why? To kill the fucker who just killed you! Thats what its like here as well, but it gives new definition to a "headshot". (and you dont have to do your killing to the sounds of racist rednecks and singing 10 year olds)

Chances are if you like one you will like the other, but if it comes down to one, I would say NG2 is the better package. If you have already played DMC4 and havent played NG2 be prepared to be blown away. If you havent played either, you are clearly gay*. Thank You.








There has been a pretty good deal of hype for this game. I must admit, I have gotten a bit caught up in it myself. I decided I wanted to buy this game the moment I heard it was announced.



Not because I played it and thought it was good, but because I believed it would offer an experience in gaming second to none. Now, Im not so sure about that. Sure it will be cool the first few times I chop off some limbs. Im sure there will be moments of joy after succesfully defeating large groups of enemies with my deadly ninja attacks. But after that, what will I be left with? Not too much im affraid. I can admit it. I doubt I will even be compelled enough to finish the game at all unless there is something there that can manage to hook me in. I didnt find it in the first game, although it was fun in short burts. I was looking forward to this game noentheless.

Enter the case of the mysterious demo.

I was under the impression we could have had a demo for this thing weeks if not months ago and yet, here we are today, the day the game ships and nothing for us folks here in the States. As much as I want to blame the lack of a demo stateside on the weak US Dollar part of me knows the truth. The truth being this game is crap. I know its crap, I still want to play it, I still want to pay 60 bucks for it, but I know its crap.



I guess I just want a new game to play and this fits the desription, but at this point I am almost tempted to spend my 60 bucks on something else. (kung fu panda anyone?)

I mean, that Bourne game might not be the best game ever, but at least they let us try it ou before they released it. Even "Hour Of Victory" had a demo.



How bad does a game have to be to avoid the release of a demo until after it hits retail? I dont think it has to be "bad" per se, but I think when a game is sure to dissapoint based on either

a) lack of innovation

b) lack of polish or

c) lack of being good

there is a chance a demo will be held off to avoid turning off those people who will buy it day 1 before playing it (like myself). These people know there are many folks who will buy a sequel based on the love for the IP regardless, in fact I bet they are counting more on fans of the franchise to purchase this game than new people, people who have never played a NG game. So at the end of the day, I think they know that they have more to risk, then they do to gain and thus no demo.

I also think that the governement rigged the towers with explosives to bring thm down after the planes hit on 9/11 and that America, Canada, and Mexico will join forces and currencies bringing in the "amero" any day now. If you dont, thats your probelm! ;)



Also, r6v2 matchmaking STILL sucks.








So I walk into one of the many local blockbusters Friday evening to return Dark Sector (finally, after 3 rentals) and what do I see? A brand new Nintendo Wii for sale. Of course my first reaction was to ask the dude behind the counter if they actually had one or if this was some sort of deception. He told me they had 1 or 2 remaining. (lies im sure) I immediately walk over to the Wii section to see what I would actually play if I bought this thing. First thing that jumps out is this “brawl” game I keep hearing about then I see Mario Galaxy out of the corner of my eye. I was sold. I decided I would rent them both along with my new purchase.

I was a little unsure how I would feel about these games for 2 reasons.

1) I have not had a Nintendo console since the NES and

2) I typically enjoy violent life like games such as COD4 and r6v2.

However, I couldn’t resist and was confident that Mario would be as great today as it was back in my younger days.

I was right. Mario Galaxy has given me feelings no 360 game has yet and is as fun as Mario 1, 2, and 3 was when I first played them. The game is genuinely fun! Imagine that. I bought a copy of Resident Evil 4 as well since I missed it on the GC and ps2 and have been eager to try it. I had a wonderful Wii-kend (see what I did there?) and am so excited that I got my hands on one! I think I will pick up Okami and No More Heroes soon. I also have to check out Twilight Princess (haven’t played Zelda since the sequel on the NES and Metroid Prime (haven’t played Metroid since the Original).

Any ideas or recommendations would be greatly appreciated!

oh, and the best part? Chicks dig it!