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4:47 PM on 07.01.2008

N*gga always tryin' to eat somebody's burgers! (NVGR)

This is, by far, the funniest shit I have seen today.
The first word is 'shit', so turn the volume down, if you have to.

[embed]93266:12757[/embed]   read

8:36 PM on 06.27.2008

OVER NINE THOUSaaaaaaaaaaaND!!!!

Well, as you may become aware after looking at this, I am not a huge fan of Dragonball Z. In fact, I don't like it at all. In fact fact, I hate it. The few times I have watched it, the same thing happens: Two people are fighting...well are about to fight, so it seems....and they sit there talking back and forth about why they're about to fight, both looking like they're trying to squeeze a turd the size of the Statue of Liberty out. Then it goes on for a century until the episode ends.

Anyway, I'm taking myself out of this, to save it for some DBZ nerd who actually likes that show. I was initially entering just for the 360, but that's kind of shitty, so I'll use this as an excuse to make fun of that worthless show.

taste it   read

4:39 PM on 06.27.2008

A-Ha - Quake on Me

Someone took some Quake gameplay footage and made it look like the A-Ha - Take on Me video. Pretty sweet, if you ask me.

Don't know how old this is...if it is at all, but...


I've actually never played Quake, so if it's not Quake, don't cast your stones   read

2:04 PM on 06.27.2008

Madden '08 $10 on all systems.

Since I had to hide my last deal blog, I found a not-so-spectacular one. Micro Center is selling Madden '08 for $10 on all consoles, and $8 on PC.

There may be 1...2 people who may be interested in this, even though '09 will be out in August.


let's hope this one hasn't already been posted   read

2:38 PM on 06.18.2008

Japan and South Korea racing for robot apocalypse (robot-related)

How badass is it that the term "robot legislation" exists and is being commonly used? Pretty badass, if you ask me. As badass as that sounds, it's pretty frightening, as well. It seems that Japan is worried that South Korea will start the inevitable robot/human war before they can, so they're stepping up development of "intelligent service robots"

"Takamoto said the new group will initially focus on expanding the market for simple service robots designed to "hedge risk" - keep grandma and grandpa engaged with life, monitor pets, watch children. "

"But I don't necessarily know that robots should do everything." Yea. You'll be screaming that into the blank stare of one of your own, while it crushes your skull betwixt its hands.

full article

I can only hope Old Glory Insurance starts up soon.
[embed]91202:12365[/embed]   read

12:15 AM on 06.13.2008

The start of the Affair. Halo 1 multi-player

First and foremost, let me say this. I AM NOT a Halo fanboy. My hatred for Halo 2 and Halo 3 is directly proportional in magnitude to my love for boobs, or as some of you prefer, bewbs. In my opinion, boobs are the greatest thing on the planet.

That said, I come from a generation where multi-player only meant friends coming over or going to a friend's house to play a game with more than one player at a time. It meant getting our controllers dirty and stained with pizza roll grease that the host's mom nuked. It meant hitting A & B together and taking one of your friend's extra lives. It meant playing a game with your friends without interruption.

Now, multi-player means putting a head set on, getting online via game console or computer and most of the time playing with people you have/will never meet. It will involve people like 13375NiP3|2, H4XXrK00L or W33Dsmoke420BoNgRiP, instead of Jason or Mark. I don't mean to say multi-player is absolutely terrible now, but (call me old fashioned, or just old) I prefer the simpler times.

For me, Halo 1 is the best multi-playing action I got out of a video game. It surpassed Goldeneye and that's no simple task. I remember going up to my friend's church and seeing Halo for the first time. There were two big screen tv's, a 30" in another room, and another smaller one someone brought from his house. All 16 slots were filled and we had to wait for the game to end for our turn. At first, we weren't that into it. It was just a pretty cool game that you could play with a lot of people....ok, that's cool, whatever. I had no intention of buying an XBOX. Then something happened that would change the game in mine eyes forever.

This, of course, means capture the flag at the map Blood Gulch (I punctuate it like it's a proper noun. That tells you how much respect I have for this).
The following criteria had to be met for a good game of CTF BG:
1. Murder mix. This was our custom soundtrack of slaying music including bands such as White Zombie, Slayer, Pantera, Vision of Disorder, Lamb of God, Buckethead and many more!! Call now to get your Murder Mix today and we'll include a set of earplugs valued at $9.99 at NO EXTRA CHARGE!!!!!
2. Only one vehicle. Warthog.
3. No radar
4. No plasma weapons. Only manly weapons. Pistol. Shotgun. Rocket Launcher. Assault Rifle. Sniper Rifle.
5. Multiple flag. 3 caps. Had to have your flag secure in your base to score.
6. 3 vs. 3 or 4 vs. 4 is the only way to fly.
7. optional: the partaking in the inhalation of plants (hey, man it's college).

I recall so many instances where I swore nothing greater could ever happen in a video game, only to be outshined by something a week later. Our games would always start the exact same way and everyone of us knew exactly what to do. White Zombie's Electric Head pt.1 starts up, we get in our respective warthogs and head for the middle. Full-throttled warthogs with a manned fully-automatic .50 cal on back headed toward each other with one purpose and one purpose only: slaughter.

I can't express the feelings of happiness, frustration, amazement, heart break and temporary hatred for an opposing player I felt throughout the time we played that game. Nothing is more satisfying than hearing a loud thump come from the other room where you know your friend is gritting his teeth trying hard not to let you know how pissed he is that you just did something to make him wish he had never tried to tangle with you in the first place....but you know how pissed he know. The kind of pissed off where you don't talk shit about it, because it happening in the first place is sufficient enough for the time. The look of desperation on the last surviving opponent's face (even though it's hidden behind a mask and non-existent) as you look through your scope letting him live long enough to watch his flag vanish into the distance before you put a hole in his computer is a very pleasant feeling (run-on?). Seeing your teammate barreling down the hillside one hand on the wheel, the other holding waving victory as a rocket screams at his bumper is almost as terrifying as hearing your girlfriend's dad open the front door mid-coitus. The disappointment you feel as you make a brilliant half-aimed half-judged rocket blast at the warthog carrying your flag, just to have it blow up and launch the flag 3 feet from their front door is unmatched.

Here are the things that went wrong in the transition from Halo 1 to 2 (contains lots of sarcasm).
-No pistol. Wow. Congratulations, you took out the best weapon in the game and replaced it with what? Oh, another assault rifle and an air soft pistol. Bravo. F'ing Bravo.
-Warthogs take damage. You've got to be kidding me! Do you remember this video?
I mean what is cooler than launching an indestructible turret-mounted ATV through the air that may or may not land perfectly and keep rolling like nothing happened, especially if you are driving? Nothing. Nothing is.
-The grenades have about 1/100 of the power they had. Then, if a grenade landed anywhere near you, there was one thing you had to do. Run. Now, it's like hurling a pine cone at someone. (pine cones are abundant where I live)
-Heat-seeking rocket launcher. Oh, thank you!! Now, I don't have to bother with aiming to kill someone. What a relief, I mean why should I have to aim to get a kill? That's just too much work. Thank you, Halo 2. I love you.

-You know, there are too many things to say on this subject and the little kids with microphones is a whole other issue I won't delve into. This is about my Halo 1 experience, not about the disgrace and absolute disappointment Halo 2 was.

We didn't only play CTF BG. I swear. We had some excellent custom game modes.
Bird Nuts was a king of the hill game where there were only shotguns, infinite grenades and invisibility the entire time. Chill Out was the best map for that one.
Shit Race was a race, where you had to get the checkpoints before the other team did. I think it was usually 3-5 laps. Only rocket launchers. I can't remember if there were infinite grenades or not. I don't think there were. We would elect one person to drive, one to watch the driver, and one to take out the other warthog.
...just to name a few

In about an hour, I am actually scheduled for a Halo 1 multi-player outing. "At least 3 on 3" is what I was told. People who still prefer Halo 1 and play from time to time get my stamp of approval, child-rapist or not. Work is going to suck tomorrow.

The reason I got an XBOX, as I'm sure was the same reason a large percentage of people did, was for Halo 1. I didn't buy another XBOX game. The only other XBOX game I played was Psychonauts, which is great, by the way, for anyone who has never played it. I don't even feel bad about that. I should, but that game gave me so much, it made up for everything. I remember the first day Halo 2 came out. We started playing it immediately with the same people that always played and one hour later, we were playing Halo 1 again.

Just returned from Halo. I'm hungry.

Halo 1 had its fair share of glitches, which some people hated the game because of. I can understand that, but that's the kind of thing that you have to accept and play with as if it were made to be in there. Everyone took advantage of the glitches. One of my favorites is how you double-tap the reload button and switch to the other weapon and the first keeps reloading. In fact, I probably did that about 300 times tonight not even thinking about it. A glitch I hate is the term we coined "phantom rocket". This is when you fire a rocket launcher while turning and it vanishes like a black man when he sees the po-lice acomin' (no offense). Ooooh the squat jump is great. You can fall from really high and if you time the squat just right, you take no damage. That's a good one that actually requires a bit of skill and practice.

Those Red vs. Blue videos came from Halo 1. How can you not like that?

And this was made.

Damn, that's sweet.

I will say this about Halo 3 that is actually a great idea. The replays. If we had that during our games, I would have endless amounts of entertainment on hand.

Best game ever? Not even close.
Best multi-player game ever? So far. In my opinion anyway.

And to further clarify my love for boobs:

5:15 PM on 04.28.2008

X-acto cut affecting gaming. NSFpeoplewhocan'tlookatblood/cuts/grossstuff

Just wanted to share my recent accident involving an X-acto blade and its ill affects on my COD4 butt-raping ability. I sliced my left index finger while getting my portfolio together. Not only is it making my right strafe harder to do, but it is also hindering one of the most important aspects of my online gaming strategy.

I am, of course, referring to shit talking. When I have to call someone a 'faggot' or 'pussy' for doing something that deserves the insult (i.e that fucking martyrdom bullshit, spawn camping or for simply being better than I am), I need to get what I'm saying in quickly, before some dumbass luckily randomly hurls a grenade up my asshole.

Typing something like, "haha, you fucking suck" after someone misses me with a knife and I splatter their brains all over the trash dumpster, has become a chore and takes 2-3 seconds longer than it used to, since I can't use my left index finger and am one of those who uses only only index, middle, and ring fingers when typing.

Check it out:


P.S. try this at home.   read

6:36 PM on 04.15.2008

Megaman school project.

I had some Graphic Design project where I could only use a certain set of colors, and this was the result.
It won't be a portfolio piece by any means, but it was fun to do. And Megaman was made with individual squares and it took a long ass time to make.

Thoughts? Criticisms? Praises? Awesome bewbage?

If anyone saw my last post (you probably didn't) and wanted to shoot me, I apologize. I was more than half-asleep and it seemed funny (and it is with the comments). I think it was about 5 here. I didn't even remember I did it until I got on here today.   read

6:39 PM on 04.01.2008

April Fools is stupid.

Were no strangers to love
You know the rules and so do i
A full commitments what Im thinking of
You wouldnt get this from any other guy

I just wanna tell you how Im feeling
Gotta make you understand

* never gonna give you up
Never gonna let you down
Never gonna run around and desert you
Never gonna make you cry
Never gonna say goodbye
Never gonna tell a lie and hurt you

Weve know each other for so long
Your hearts been aching
But youre too shy to say it
Inside we both know whats been going on
We know the game and were gonna play it

And if you ask me how Im feeling
Dont tell me youre too blind to see

(* repeat)
Give you up. give you up
Give you up, give you up
Never gonna give
Never gonna give, give you up
Never gonna give
Never gonna give, five you up

I just wanna tell you how Im feeling
Gotta make you understand

(* repeat 3 times)

Lyrically Rick rolled motherfuckers.   read

6:06 PM on 04.01.2008

T3 is awesome.

That's about it really. When the bad terminator screams at the end...god damn brilliant. could have used more break dancing, though.

[embed]79243:9877[/embed]   read

3:18 PM on 03.14.2008

Mammal Sauce (NVGR)

I have to find something to do until 4:30...

If you have not heard Crotchduster's Mammal Sauce, do yourself a favor and listen to this. Just hit play, and don't watch the video, since it's just one picture the entire time. I think one dude made it, so Crotchduster is not even a band. This shit is 100% unfiltered genius.

[embed]75600:9193[/embed]   read

1:57 PM on 02.27.2008

Turning Point Ad

Is that ad pissing anyone else off? I mean, it's not a big deal at my house, where my computer isn't a '03 Dell, but at work, it takes like 34 minutes to load the page. Plus, it's fucking huge. Also, it doesn't even look like a good game. SHIT   read

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