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About


My name's Ben. I'm pretty quiet but really easy to get along with. I've been playing video games since I was a little kid, watching my brother play the NES and sometimes playing with him. The first game I ever beat was Super Mario RPG, and that's when I developed a love for video games.

I'm also the Friday recapper for the Cblog Recaps team!

I was on an episode of the Secret Moon Base Podcast! You can listen to me talk about video game bosses with the gang!

Games that I thoroughly enjoy:
Katamari Damacy
Shadow of the Colossus
EarthBound and Mother 3
Cave Story
Demon's Souls and Dark Souls
Persona 3 and 4
Catherine
Mega Man Legends
Super Meat Boy
VVVVVV
Okami
Aquaria
Bit.Trip series
Rayman Origins
Super Mario RPG
Team Fortress 2
Tokyo Jungle
Bayonetta
El Shaddai: Ascension of the Metatron
WarioWare
Beyond Good & Evil
Psychonauts
Dragon Quest VIII
Final Fantasy IV, VI, VII and IX
Tomb Raider
Majora's Mask
Chrono Trigger
Mega Man 2
Mister Mosquito
Tomba!

My Backlog

Other things that I thoroughly enjoy:
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Eels (the band... and the animal I guess)
Cowboy Bebop
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bbain
10:15 PM on 10.04.2011



Wood Man,
I seek thee within the mechanical forest.
Thy lair lies guarded by metallic monkeys,
protected by robotic rabbits and bionic bats.
Machinery meets Mother Nature,
and I must best both of them
lest I never meet thee.



Wood Man,
once within thy fortress of flowers and firs
we are finally met face to face.
Behold! Thy body of birch, so beautiful.
Thy helmet of hazel, so heavenly.
Thy legs of larch and thy oaken orifices tempt me so.
I stand in amazement as I ponder thy form.



Wood Man,
send forth thy gift of leaves,
thy razor-sharp foliage,
to cut me from my reverie.
It pains me so, but I must proceed.
Fear not the flames I send thee,
for they are a symbol of my burning passion.


Artwork courtesy of Jack Teagle.

O Wood Man,
thou art oft maligned and ridiculed
for thy wooden form and thy leafy weapons.
But thou art not universally despised,
for there is one who appreciates thy leafiness.
There is one who adores thy woodiness,
and that lone soul is me.

Wood Man, you give me wood.

<3



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Legacy Comments (will be imported soon)


How do you fap something more than once? I should fap this five times.
How could anyone not love a robot made out of wood?
awesome man , just awesome! This got me into the mood for some woodmans theme! YEAH!
Pfahahah, this is pretty great. But how do you feel about WoodMan.exe?
Hehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehe Wood Man
Poor Woodman. Even I am guilty of making fun of him when I was young and foolish. Great poem! I love the abrupt shift in tone in the last line!
Megaman 2 tribute ftw
LMAO!! Love that ending line! Awesomeness!


Thank you for this.
Thanks for the comments everyone! I was originally planning to write a normal blog about the Bonne family (I still might), but then I remembered Wood Man for some reason and I became inspired to write this. He really is my favorite villain from the original Mega Man games because, I mean come on, he's a robot made of wood! I'm glad you guys found my poem enjoyable/humorous! :D

@GrooveMan: Man, you got me all excited! I thought someone made some program or game centered around Wood Man. I haven't actually played Mega Man Battle Network, but WoodMan.exe looks pretty crazy!

But speaking of things centered around Wood Man: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Mt9ZmwBM8ms
I really love Wood Man. They managed to pack so much personality in a little low res sprite with a total of... 2 animations?

I actually stuck Wood Man in a comic I drew in my early 20's. Good times.
Fapped for the last line.
I like wood....
Love this. :D You're a remarkably good writer.

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