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amxwolf avatar 9:44 AM on 06.12.2013  (server time)
Super Smash Brothers-Kazooie?

Ok Nintendo, are you listening?

I've been hearing a lot of things lately about a new Super Smash Brothers installment to this immensely popular series. It goes without saying that the OG, Melee, and Brawl were probably some of Nintendo's best selling titles. And why not? It brought all of us gamers together, under one roof, to take part in the indescribable bliss that was watching our favorite Nintendo characters beat the tar out of each other with baseball bats, beam sabers, and bom-ombs.

In the last few days, the gaming community has been given a sample of the newest Smash Soup that Nintendo and Sakurai have apparently been simmering since (conceivably) the orgasmic reaction to the release of Super Smash Bros. Brawl back in 2008. The question is, as it always has been with the release of a new Smash Brothers, the eternal, "Who will the new characters be?" I'd be lying if I said I wasn't excited about Mega Man, as well as genuinely curious, in the absolute purest sense about the Wii Fit Trainer. But I can't help but feel as though Nintendo has seriously overlooked a possible gold mine for a character; a duo whom time hasn't forgotten, but simply relocated. I am referring to one of my favorite video game tag-teams of all time, the ever ridiculous, super splendiforis: Banjo and Kazooie!

So. Why you ask? Other than it being 110 octane awesome, I have prepared my reasons for why Nintendo should seriously consider putting our favorite short-wearing and Breegull-toting bear into their newest installment, even if it means paying out the nose:

1)(Possibly the best reason of all)The fan-base is staggering.
    It's safe to say that if you grew up in the 90's, or owned an N64 in 1998, you were aware of the release of the timelessly entertaining adventure that is, Banjo-Kazooie. It was, and still is, a series that stands on it's own, regardless of which console you own it for. There are thousands of people that out there nipping at the heels of Microsoft to produce another new adventure for this bear and bird. That being said, there's about an, oh, I don't know, 150% chance that the mere announcement of their placement in this series will result in a massive pants explosion amongst the fan base and most likely hundreds of pre-ordered copies just for giving us the opportunity to not only peck the witch's butt, but our friend's butts as well.

2) There's at least 22 different stages to choose from for Character Based Stages
    Now I apologize to the Nuts and Bolts fanatics out there for excluding those possibilities, but since I know very little about that game (due to personal BK-beliefs and aesthetics), I won't insult you by trying to talk about it. My ignorance aside, there's at least a whopping twenty-two absolutely iconic stages that can be adapted for some awesome Kick-assery. From the golden sands of Gobi's Valley to the icy hot region of Hellfire Peaks, there is a veritable well of well thought out levels to be adapted for the Super Smash Brothers series. The best part is, the fans know these levels so well, that they would SO VERY EASILY mix with the Zelda and Mario worlds that are equally as recognizable and satisfying. I for one, would love to see a Mad Monster Mansion stage, putting the church on display. Or maybe even better yet would be a Witchy World tribute, complete with Big Top and Saucer of Peril. The ideas and the potential for success, for lack of a better term, are staggering.

3) If Nintendo chooses to keep using assist and collectible trophies - There are PLENTY of characters to model

    One has to admire thorough game design. And when you give literally every character and enemy in the series with a personality-bestowing name to go by, you're thorough to say the least. I'm sure I'm not alone when I say that I would actually watch the entire credits sequence for Banjo-Kazooie simply because I enjoyed reliving all the various puzzles and baddie-blasting. This is something that I can't really say for most of the games I've spent time playing over the decades. Between the various characters, the enemies, and the items, finding models for assist trophies and other usable items (not to mention collectable trophies) would be almost TOO EASY. I mean, the mighty Jinjonator? Gruntilda? Mumbo?! The Zubbas? CONGO?! CLANKER?! HUMBA-WUMBA?!?! BOTTLES?!?! JAM JARS?!?! *walks off into the distance naming various characters and items*

4) There is music to be used, and arrangements we've been begging for.

    I know I'm not the only one that got school-girl status giddy when I heard about the Banjo-Kazooie orchestration that came out recently. From the lips of a DIE HARD Kirkhope fan, I would positively melt at the prospect of playing fisty-cuffs whilst listening to either the original or a new arrangement of ANY of the Banjo compositions. There's  a bunch to choose from and clearly, a desire to have them. Grant Kirkhope's songs in these games have reached a level just short of immortality. So why not utilize this stash of wet dream, ear-gasm fuel to help push for even greater sales?

    OK ok. In the interest of not boring you, I won't blather on and on about how this SHOULD already be happening. But I must ask, with so many reasons why it should happen, and knowing that the reception of this news would make waves across the gaming community, can Nintendo afford NOT to include this duo in their new game? Who Knows? Allowing Banjo and Kazooie to step back into the spot light may reignite the series, which at this point would appear to be a fuel-saturated match. And in doing so, Nintendo might bring in a brand new generation of Banjo lovers for the gaming world to nurture and Microsoft to inevitably profit off of. I know that the RareWare/Nintendo/Microsoft exchange was sloppy and heart wrenching enough to rank with some of the worst breakups in the history of mankind, and more likely than not, putting Banjo and loyal Kazooie in the ring with some of Nintendo's greatest will come at a great price. But I promise you Nintendo....I promise you: The game will sell. The game WILL SELL. We've all been waiting for both a new Super Smash as well as a new Banjo.

Simply put: Reserving a slot for Banjo and Kazooie? Well, that's just the last piece to the jigsaw puzzle now isn't it?

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