It's time to throw down my entry into Aborto's swag contest.

Now as a long time RPG player I have learned a few tricks when it comes to assembling the ultimate team in a game. There is a reason most RPG's use the same character archetypes in all popular games where teamwork is called for. Based on REASONS I'll be using the same method in selecting my patented “Ultimate Tag Team of Unlimited Ultimateness” (catchy isn't it?).

First, you need your hero type. This character should be able to effective in any given circumstance since he's your go to guy. Ideally a swordsman who dabbles in some magic so he's not gimped against ranged opponents.

PICK ONE : The hero

Geralt of Rivia, AkA: The Witcher

Geralt is a professional Witcher which means that he hunts and kills monsters, demons, bandits, sorcerers and other evil things for a living. Think about that, what do you do everyday, I bet you aren't out tracking werewolves and striga's are you? That kind of daily training keeps Geralt from being the slightest bit phased by any of the creepier selections others have made. No screaming in terror here, he'll just whip out a sword and go to work. Makes a great lead in character to access your opponents weaknesses.

Next, you'll need a dedicated magic user to lay down the hurt. This character has to be insanely powerful to exceed the hero's offensive power.

PICK TWO: The Mage

Jean Grey AkA: Dark Phoenix

While the lovely Miss Grey is a force to be reckoned with in her own right when she unleashes her Dark Phoenix powers she is suddenly capable of “accidentally” destroying the world. With pretty much limitless power at her disposal no other fighters would stand a chance against her. It makes perfect sense that the ultimate team would require the ultimate mutant to be complete. Done and done.

Now one could argue that my current team is already overpowered to the point of making any attempt to stop me foolish by definition. Surely allowing me to pick another teammate is unfair and will only result in tears of anguish by my already trembling opponents. Well, Aboroto demanded three team members and three he shall have.

Following my RPG trend I now require a character that is solely included for brute strength. This character requires no fancy footwork or special powers to make them a threat, as they are dangerous by their very existence. It just so happens I have the perfect choice in mind.

PICK THREE: The Brawler

Ty Rannosaurus AkA: The T Rex from DinoCrisis

Oh yes, I went there. While my team was already perfect there is one slight potential issue I've become aware of when reviewing my picks. Witchers are infamous for their insatiable libidos and Dark Phoenix isn't exactly a prude. In the off chance that during the course of the battle my first choices were to sneak off for some nooky I'd be left high and dry. Fortunately I have a fail safe backup plan in the form of the largest known land predator.

No button mashing combos needed here, the T Rex just runs around stomping and biting at everything in its path until it is good and dead. Nothing short of a well placed explosive could stop this rampaging behemoth. This is domination in its most primal form and its the final member of my “Ultimate Tag Team of Unlimited Ultimateness.”

In case your chin is still firmly planted on your chest from when it dropped earlier here's a quick recap of my team. 1. Geralt (awesome) 2. Dark Phoenix (super powerful) 3. T Rex (get in the choppa, oh wait he ATE it).

Everyone else can pack up and go home, this team wins everything. Ultimate Win!