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I met your Mom at a delicate time in her life. She was feeling vulnerable and her self-esteem was low. I had just returned from a humanitarian mission in Africa where I built seven brand new towns out of aids. The only thing that impressed your Mom more than my inhuman strength, Brad Pitt abs and Steven Hawking intellect was the length, girth and prettiness of my immense penis.

She then had a multiple orgasm that lasted 6 weeks. That was before I even touched her. That's how much of a filthy whore your mom really is. I'm not going to tell you anything more because I think it is disrespectful, but I just want to explain one more thing to you - you know how when you listen closely at night you can hear your Dad crying himself to sleep? Now you know why.

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Why I'm not buying Ass Creed 2
Your Moms Hot Lover \| 8:07 AM on 12.06.2009	15 comments

It's not Jim's review score. I mean come on, it's Jim, who can take him seriously? He doesn't even like Mass Effect. Pshh. Plus he's pretty overweight so he obviously can't be trusted to not eat pies let alone review things.

However, it is the ass creed 2 fanboy reactions to Jim that has put me off the game. It's this kind of retarded senseless whining that makes all video gamers seem like illiterate morons and that ultimately keeps non-gamers looking down on our favorite hobby even though they rot their brains with their weekly fix of 20 hours worth of celebrity/reality shows.

So my wallet stays closed for Ass Creed 2 for now. Simply because I just can't bear the thought that I will start identifying with the butt hurt fan boys.

Maybe I'll stealthily sneak it onto my amazon wishlist in the new year and wait for a price cut and for the furor to die down. 'Cos you know, parkour around venice, that's just cool. But no, for now, wallet closed. Definately.

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14 comments | showing # 1 to 14

randombullseye

I paid 8 dollars for the first Ass Creed. I enjoyed it, but I didn't love it.

I will pay about the same for Ass Creed 2.

Gatsby

$10 was a good price to pay for Ass Effect, Ass Creed 2 seems like it's worth a good 30 though.

Xzyliac

Personally I think it's dumb to let a bitchfest put you off to a game (or anything really) but whatever floats your boat.

Blasto

Why Blasto's not buying Ass Creed 2: My girlfriend already bought it for me.

So yeah, Xzyliac covered it but, um... not buying a game because whiny internet people don't like that, er.. Jim doesn't like it? Doesn't really seem smart does it? Well, whatever floats your boat man, fight the good fight..or something.

SnatchTease

Yo he gave the AC2 DLC, The Saboteur a good review. All that shit is fun in my opinion.

Your Moms Hot Lover

it's not a matter of principle of anything, I haven't sat there and thought it through, it's a reaction, the butt hurt whining has killed my enthusiasm for the game.

I brought it up because, presumably, people who are whining about the review want other people to buy the game because they think it is good and worth their time and money, but in fact for me at least, it's the whining itself that has put me off and not the review.

Xzyliac

@Your Moms Hot Lover
Still think you're taking this way too personally. To be completely honest you're sounding just as whiny and butthurt as the whiners.

Who cares what Jim says or what fanboys say? If you want to buy it than just buy it.

Chris Carter

Just rent the game; jesus. It's good.

Ubersuntzu

I was one of the people totally disappointed by it, but it's worth the 5 bucks for a rental if you were already interested in it.

mistic

What I thought was really funny is that the fanboys all agreed with the shortcomings of the game that Jim put forth... yet they still claimed he should've given it a HUGE score... I really like AssCreed 1 until I got to the third city and realised I had to do exactly the same thing AGAIN, just in another location... Long story short... never finished the game...

Jonny

Don't listen to him. He's poor.

KINGof210

What Xzyliac said.

Specifically this: "Who cares what Jim says or what fanboys say? If you want to buy it than just buy it."

Justice

So you're not buying it because of fanboys? You shouldn't give them such power over you.

Velt

ok... so the Sterling does noy like some games and doen not give it a high review... so?

also, he doesnt return my "google waves" so he is a bad person.

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