Prepare your orifices. I've been watching you. While you eat, while you sleep, while you shower while sitting down (why do you do that?). And I know just what you need. You sit around playing your Spiderman video games, reading your Spiderman comics, watching your Spiderman movies, touching yourself to your Spiderman fanfic, thinking, "Why has nobody made a game about the real Spider-man?"
Remarkable Beard Games introduces The Uhmazing Spiderman RPG. This isn't your dad's Spiderman. Or your creepy uncle who has boundary issues' Spiderman. No, this is your Spiderman. Sean Parker even came to us and told us to drop the hyphen so it sounds better.
This is a retro-modern style (dude what) game in which "You play as BatmanSpiderman, in the fictional and completely original city of New Ark. Why is Spiderman in New Ark, you might ask? Because you silly willy, New York got destroyed by like some big bomb or something. Now, the criminals he once helped put away have taken over, and it's all up to Spiderman to go Medieval on their asses. But even Spiderman can't do this alone. He's going to have to gather a rag tag team of other heroes who may or may not like him. Okay, most of them don't like him. They're probably jealous of his sweet dance moves."