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Are We a TEA BAGGING NATION ?!?
Y0j1mb0 | 10:22 PM on 03.03.2008 63 comments




Want to hear something silly? ( something silly ...something silly!, sorry couldn't help it. ) I have been playing Call of Duty 4 lately like a madman trying to get my rank up, sitting at Gunnery Sergeant at present, and I've noticed something. Shocking that, but what it was that I noticed, didn't come to me until I got what I didn't notice hit me square in my face during my game last night. You see, I got tea bagged by a fool after he busted a cap in me. Immediately after that happened I realized that I haven't been tea bagged in a coon's age. Perhaps that has a lot to do with my lack of playing Halo 3 and Shadowrun for a long while.



Y'know, it's a funny thing getting tea bagged. I mean sure the act itself is a humorous thing. But what's even more so is the effort for the player in question to apply to that supposed demoralizing act. Especially in a game like Call of Duty 4 when death is a mere step away. To do that to someone, your basically thinking: I'm going to risk my team objectives and my possible death, because of vulnerable position I'll be in, just to simulate my digital nuts going in your digital mouth. That's when the act becomes even more funny.


OBJECTION.

Some call the act itself childish, immature or just plain silly. It is all that, but it sure doesn't lose it's fraternal charm when done to you by a friend and vice versa. Anyway back to my story, so after this guy performed the deed upon me, my initial response, aside from, oh this asshole did not just teabag me!, was file the memory for a post. Now typically when I post something I'm always looking for pictures to incorporate into my blog. Imagine my surprise when I just googled the word "Tea Bag" and a plethora of half pornographic, half blog posts and articles were of the topic of my recent incident. From rapping about it..to creating dances about it, I was just taken aback by the sheer volume.


Are you kidding me? They'll make a dance about anything nowadays.

I mean I saw Blog posts with titles like Tea Bagging for Dummies..I didn't know just hitting the crouch button was that hard but obviously there's a secret technique I didn't know about. There were people who inspired by Halo marathons and the tea bag finisher, decided to do this in real life at school...what!? Then of course if it's popular, the merchandise cometh. Tea bag t-shirts anyone?


O.K. then.

If there was a gaming site, they hand a write up with the subject at hand. Some even had instructional videos. It seemed that the web was just bursting at the seems with game related tea bagging stories and oddities, like tea bagging friends while they sleep in the real world ( Some friend of mine ever had the audacity to do that to me in real life would find their nuts in his mouth ).


This is pretty tame. There were quite a few more graphic in their execution.

The crazy part about all this is that it's just common. If your playing a video game that is multi player and your character can squat, expect a forthcoming tea bag . From Counter-Strike to Resistance back to Halo3 and beyond your going to have this done to you and most likely you'll be doing it too. If only for retribution. Or you could just go the other end of the spectrum and become a full fledged maniac about it, teabagging everything and everyone in the game.



So. Are we a Teabagging Nation? It's safe to say that yes...yes we are. It defitnately has the reach and penetration of pop culture. Even my old ass wasn't above the fray. Remember that dude that tea bagged me in COD4? Well, after he did that, I didn't care about anything else but finding Wat3rl00 so I could return the favor. It took me almost to the end of the match but finally I dropped him and did the deed. Childish?, yeah, immature?, you betcha. Satisfying?


WHAT. THE. FUCK.

100%.



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63 comments | showing # 1 to 50

prev next 50 comments

MrSadistic's Destructoid Blog
In-game tea bagging are for the retards who constantly type "lulz" or "lul" after someone catches AIDS.
Sadie G's Destructoid Blog
I am proud to say I've never tea-bagged anyone...
Y0j1mb0's Destructoid Blog
Sadistic that might be because they don't have a body left after you pulverize their body with a flak cannon.
Copyright 2008 Agent Chieftain's Destructoid Blog
In SOCOM 2 on the PS2, I'd go prone and mount the corpse.
MrSadistic's Destructoid Blog
I'm glad UT 3 has audio taunts, so that way I can be annoying without resorting to using my voice.
MPHtails's Destructoid Blog
I usually tebag in retribution or if someone's been giving me a hard time, but if done in moderation or at appropriate times it can be kinda funny.
Copyright 2008 Agent Chieftain's Destructoid Blog
Also, on UT3, when I get a particularly nasty frag with the Flak Cannon, I try to fly through it on my Hoverboard.
DynamicSheep's Destructoid Blog
I knew a guy who got teabagged in real life after passing out at a party... this was years before even the first Halo. The guy found out about it and was so pissed he decided he was going to beat him up. The teabagger kicked his ass. Moral of the story: Sometimes, you're just gonna' get teabagged.
Copyright 2008 Agent Chieftain's Destructoid Blog
@MrSadistic

OH SMACK!
shipero's Destructoid Blog
I've never tea bagged anyone but I do sometimes jump up and down on peoples corpses. Not as stylish as Liam's grave dance but it gets the point across.
Steel Squirrel's Destructoid Blog
I think the reason why there's not a lot of tea-bagging in CoD4, is due in part to the martyrdom perk.

I'll have to admit, I teabag my friends when I play with them whenever I get the chance...... in the game as well.
MrSadistic's Destructoid Blog
@copyright

YOU'LL FEEL THE EFFECT OF THAT ONE IN THE MORNING!
taumpytears's Destructoid Blog
Probably. People love their tea bagging and think they are very clever by doing it.
Y0j1mb0's Destructoid Blog
@Steel Squirrel:

o_O
Copyright 2008 Agent Chieftain's Destructoid Blog
@MrSadistic

ROOKIE MISTAKE.
FinalFist's Destructoid Blog
I tea-bag as a part of a daily exercise and spiritual cleansing regiment.
Takeshi's Destructoid Blog
I thinks it's kinda strange. Is shooting me not enough?!

Resistance: FOM you've got to do some teabagging to get a couple skill points.

'Lovely Parting Gifts' - Squat over 15 dead hybrids

Thank god for UT3, it's so damn fast you won't be able to get it down. And if someone manages to do it, I'm already killed 6 more times.
(But not by Sadistic thanks to US and EUR versions not compatible)
MrSadistic's Destructoid Blog
@Copyright

I'LL BE BACK... AGAIN AND AGAIN.
MrSadistic's Destructoid Blog
@Takeshi

I heard they were fixing that server compatibility BS with a patch. Don't know if it's true or not.
Y0j1mb0's Destructoid Blog
Shadowrun has a viral achievement where you only get it if someone has it..the teabag achievemnt that is.
Takeshi's Destructoid Blog
@Sadistic
They are. I've read it in an e-mail from them. Also that patch is finished but they don't know when they are going to release it.
ajaxender's Destructoid Blog
I just dont get tea-baggging... much more entertaining to go kill some other fools. Also cmon, you still have your pants on... and in Halo the victim has a helmet on! Makes no sense at all... :P
MrSadistic's Destructoid Blog
@Takeshi

I hope it's pretty damn soon, unless they decide to release a little before (or after) the summer PSN update. I also hope it fixes the headset problem because I really want to a) be a complete douche bag after winning a round and uh... well that's about it.
Takeshi's Destructoid Blog
@Y0j1mb0
So it is actually the developers that are encouraging this crazy act of knee exercising sit-ups? Are there more games that have those achievements?
Y0j1mb0's Destructoid Blog
Takeshi:

I don't know about other games..but Shadowrun defitnately has that one.
Steel Squirrel's Destructoid Blog
@ Y0j1mb0

B====D
*^*
O
Takeshi's Destructoid Blog
Also Y0j1mb0, that rap video is disturbingly long. I thought you was completely against the 'other' word for black people right?

Teabagging black people, you racist! o_O
Steel Squirrel's Destructoid Blog
Damn it....... if you use your imagination you can see what I was going for there...... damn auto-format.

Samit Sarkar's Destructoid Blog
Come on, Y0j1mb0...you’ve never done a grave dance in Warhawk? Granted, I’ve never teabagged anyone in CoD 4, but that’s because you’re never safe in that game (as you mentioned).
Dexter345's Destructoid Blog
Teabagging is strange, because when it's done by a friend, I can take it as friendly insult. But then when some random person on XBox Live does it, I get the feeling that they actually seriously think that they're more prime human beings because they killed me before I killed them. It's not fun with people you don't know, it's just obnoxious.
Sharpless's Destructoid Blog
I occasionally teabag some of my friends for minor lulz, or to piss off any assholes that cross my path, but I don't usually do it otherwise. I don't see the point.
Sharpless's Destructoid Blog
In-game, that is.
Steel Squirrel's Destructoid Blog
@ Sharpless
On that second comment:
EXACTLY Sharpless...... exactly.
Sadie G's Destructoid Blog
Does anyone else find it mildly homosexual?
Your balls on another guy's face.
Maybe it's just a guy thing but as a female, looks a little gay...
Aziel13's Destructoid Blog
ouch well at least you got the R-tard back
Fleet3000's Destructoid Blog
yea, there's a lot of fun to have after killing someone and tea bagging them. it's what we do to express our artistic side...i think.
Steel Squirrel's Destructoid Blog
@ Sadie G

You have to be a guy to understand the whole, "Hey look at my new belt" trick and gently placing your sack on your drunken friend's unconscious forehead. Mildly gay? Perhaps....
Hilarious? Always.

There's a very strange, thin line there. Let me tell you, waking up from a drunken stupor with a testicle in your eye is terrifying, but.... still funny.
MrSadistic's Destructoid Blog
No uh... I agree with Sadie it's completely gay. Also, don't even justify man-crushes.
Steel Squirrel's Destructoid Blog
Ah, you're just scared you might like it MrSadistic. Man crushes are just gay, a friendly sack on the face, not as gay.

I didn't expect a guy who had an avatar, at one point, that depicted someone's head getting sawed off, would be scared of a drunken teabag incident.
shipero's Destructoid Blog
If wanting to put my balls on another man's face makes me gay then I don't want to be straight.
Steel Squirrel's Destructoid Blog
@ shipero

That's the spirit! Stick it to 'em!
Sometimes it does get stuck though....... depends on the temperature of the surrounding area and % of humidity.
It's a very complicated procedure.
decoyb's Destructoid Blog
People teabag in cod4? I've never noticed. Martyrdom may be cheap but it's a damn good ball buster.
shipero's Destructoid Blog
@Steel Squirrel

I don't let anybody tell me where I can and cannot put my balls. Not my friends, my co-workers, the police, nobody.
Steel Squirrel's Destructoid Blog
@ shipero

Hahaha, very good.
Privates or Publics, you decide.
Vixen's Destructoid Blog
I only seen people teabag in Halo. Yet again, everyone who plays HALO3 are douchebags! :P

Oh yeaaaa...
[skips away]
Steel Squirrel's Destructoid Blog
@ Y0j1mb0

Nice work, you've gotten up 45 comments purely based off of the common interest in testicles.
MrSadistic's Destructoid Blog
Have you ever felt the need to just play with your balls? I mean they're just there, dangling about their business.
Kyousuke Nanbu's Destructoid Blog
I don't tea bag myself but its fine when its done to me, it makes me angry and more focused and I assure you, whomever did it will be killed by me many times over and I will return the tea favor in kind.
Steel Squirrel's Destructoid Blog
@ Kyousuke

That's good that you don't teabag yourself. ;)
aborto thefetus's Destructoid Blog
I've never teabagged, but I however did assrape in gears.


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 about me



Veni, vidi, vici.

Name: Francisco *AKA* Y0j1mb0

Age: 38. I'm the residential Old Geezer of Destructoid & You Tube Superstar.



Likes: Poker, Roast Beef Sandwiches, unsolicited sex, video games of all genres.

Dislikes: Elitist Pricks, Hippies, People who use the words "But I digress" and "n00bz"

Consoles I Own: PS3, Wii, Xbox 360, PSP Slim, DS Lite.
[ PSN:k0wb0y-b33b0p - Friend Code: 0774-3918-3804 - LIVE: y0j1mb0 ]

Game I'm DYING to get my grubby hands on next!!



Destructoid is a haven for truly fantastic artists. Below are but a few examples of their work I was lucky enough to receive from them. Behold my bearded samurai depictions. See if you can guess which talented Dtoider did them.























Games I love in no particular order:

Borderlands
Persona 3 :FES
Persona 4
Valkyria Chronicles.
Indigo Prophecy.
Sacred 2: Fallen Angel
Dead Space
Zack & Wiki: Quest for Barbaro's Treasure
Killzone 2.
Street Fighter IV.
SOCOM:Confrontation.
Flower.
Left4Dead.
Shadowrun.
Ico.
Shadow of Colossus.
Crimson Skies.
Crackdown.
Gunvalkyre.
Jet Force Gemini.
Pikmin Series.
Castlevania: Symphony of the Night.
Metal Gear Solid Series.
NFL 2k5.
The Legend of Zelda: The Wind Waker.
Otogi.
Front Mission 3.
Panzar Dragoon Orta.
Marvel vs. Capcom 2.
Metal Slug Series.
Virtua Fighter 5.
Dig Dug.
Mario Kart DS.
Advance Wars Series.
Tobal #2.
Animal Crossing.
Tecmo's Deception.
Manhunt.
Deathrow.
Deus Ex.
Street Fighter 2.
Half Life 2.
Dead Rising.


Founding Member of The Official Destructoid Beard Club and once Proud Reserve Recap Cblogger.

Proprietor of PS3 Friday Night Fights and PS3's Poker Nights ( Mondays @ 10pm EST. )

Things off the Blog I do. Once every month I review two movies. Generally obscure, cult classics or off the radar flicks that need to be seen by all.



The New Movie Reviews are in the works as soon as I get off my procrastinating ass and do them.

Past Movie Recommendations:

Gangster No 1
Zatoichi The Blindswordsman
Glengarry Glenn Ross
Oldboy
A History of Violence
Henry: Portrait of a Serial Killer
The Seven Samurai
High Tension
Brazil
Jacob's Ladder
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Unbreakable
Man Bites Dog
City of God


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