Welcome to what will officially now be known as Wry Guides, a pun I just couldn't pass up no matter how much I tried. I've got two goals as I make these: Improve my previous work and condense it so that it's easier to bookmark and use as a reference. Some of you might wonder why I'm bothering doing this, but I've actually been just looking for excuses to challenge myself and see if I can seriously improve my past articles. We're going to start off with redoing The Ultimate Goozex Guide. It has been completely re-written from the ground up with new content. If you read the guide before, this ain't the same anymore.



Goozex as I'm sure most people know by now, is a game trading website. The main difference between trading on Goozex as opposed to something like Destructoid's very own trading forums is that Goozex is automated. You construct a list of games you want to obtain and you're placed in line for them; after which you wait for the game to become available to you. Likewise you sit and wait for people to request your own games. Each game has a set point value you either receive or pay, you pay the exact same whether you're buying or selling. The only cash expense is that the buyer pays 1 dollar to the website and the seller pays their own shipping costs. Patience is key to putting Goozex to use but the payoff is extremely worth it. Compared to trading your games at a place like GameStop; it's not as convenient, but trust me when I say the values are incredible in comparison. On Goozex, newer games trade for nearly their full retail value. Older games (especially hard to find games) can also be found for cheaper than in most stores.

You interested yet? Make an account. New members are allowed to test out the system for themselves by requesting a free cheapo game. Doesn't mean you can't get a good one, though. In fact below in this very article you can find useful info in the "budget" section. If you want my own recommendation on a good free game to start out with, though: As of this writing either God of War or God of War II are available for free to new members. If you intend to keep reading and you don't have an account yet, you really should have one anyway. I really, really recommend that you experiment with the website for yourself while reading this article. European readers can actually get in on the fun too. I won't lie; I will receive slight benefits for anyone that signs up through this article, but let's be frank: You'd have to be insane to not at least try this website and I feel no shame in benefiting a bit from tipping you off.

If you're already interested in Goozex but don't intend to check out the rest of the guide, at least take away two tips: Goozex itself doesn't truly need a guide and everything I'm writing about just makes the place better, but these are two things you absolutely should know: Scamming is extremely rare on this website, but you can help protect yourself from this by getting Deilvery Confirmation on any packages you send out. If you end up needing direct intervention from the staff (for example changing the feedback of one of your games) send an E-Mail to feedback@goozex.com and give them all the information you can about the situation. Though not extremely fast, they will help you take care of your problem.



Let it be said immediately that it's not the best use of Goozex to obtain recently released games, not if you want to get them anytime soon at least. Everybody on Goozex tries to get a game as soon as it's listed on the site. A popular new game is going to have hundreds of requests on the first day it's listed. Let us consider the natural process of things: Somebody has to buy a copy that game brand new in order to trade it to you, they then will want to take their time beating it before they get rid of it, and then after that time one copy will be made available to the tons of people waiting in line.

If you don't mind waiting a considerable amount of time for the game's demand and price to go down then be my guest, but I'd recommend using this demand to your advantage instead. Try using Goozex as a safety pad. Many people are afraid to buy a brand new game because of how poor the average gaming store's trade-in credit is. It's not uncommon for GameStop to offer you a fraction of the original value of a game, even on the day the game came out. Goozex will almost universally offer you the original value of a newer game, which you can then use to get a different game instead. There will be tons of people ready to just snatch that game away from you with absolutely no questions, should you buy it and decide you don't want it. It's a very simple way of obtaining your Goozex points to just dispose of the new releases you disliked or don't intend to hold on to.

Certainly Goozex is a great way to get rid of your older titles to boot, but it's best to trade away newer titles before their value goes down. Either way the website will get you some of the best values possible on your games. Every game has a set value. The buying price is also the selling price. You can't get shilled with that sort of model.



So the obvious question would be, "Well you just said new releases are hard as hell to get off of Goozex, so what should I spend my points on?" We'll get to that, but I feel it's best to clarify alternatives to Goozex itself before moving on. To get the most out of Goozex as a resource you should be using alternatives in conjunction with it. One alternative we should discuss is where to get "common" games. In terms of buying used: some games are going to be easy to find locally. Every game store is going to have at least 5 used copies of Halo 3 or Super Mario Galaxy no matter what. While often you can get those games cheaper on Goozex than in stores; Goozex has no genuine policy. GameStop on the other hand has a very nice return policy on used games. Used games can be returned for cash (assuming you paid cash) within 7 days. It's on every receipt.

There's a lot of motivation to not sticking strictly to Goozex. The obvious benefit of shopping locally for used games is not having to deal with waiting on the mail, but brick and mortar return policies are critically overlooked. Now we can get to Goozex itself. Common and new games can be found elsewhere, but that hard to find stuff is one of Goozex's real strength. There are some games you'll have a much harder time finding locally. How many of you have been looking for a copy of Psychonauts for ages? What about Okami? Valkyria Chronicles, perhaps? Pretty easy games to find on Goozex; and you can get them cheap too. Unless the game is obscenely rare a little bit of waiting is all it takes to get it. Sit on your ass and the game will come to you on its own. The system's automatic. You don't even need to pay attention to the site itself. The system alerts you by E-Mail when anything important happens.

We're not done talking about alternatives, though. If you personally have something especially rare or interesting, don't consider Goozex as your only option to get rid of it. Your fellow D-Toiders might be interested themselves. Take your offers to the trading forums. Sometimes you can get some really interesting stuff from your fellow community members. I once traded Kyousuke Nanbu a copy of Metal Gear Solid 3: Subsistence for a huge pile of old strategy guides and artbooks. Likewise some of your fellow members of the collective have some OBSCENELY rare games. Between all these resources you've actually got an extremely good chance of finding any game you want; just make sure to remember that your premium trading ammo could net you some really cool stuff outside of Goozex.



Alright, let's get to learning how to abuse some of the site's features. Some of you guys are probably operating on a budget. You might not be interested in getting rare or hard to find titles so much as just having something to actually play. Aside from just getting hard to find games, Goozex's strength also lies in being able to get you some extremely cheap games. Gaming's an expensive hobby, which sucks if you happen to be broke. Totally understood my friends, and allow me to show you how to easily find all the absolute cheapest games available to you. Let's discuss using Goozex's Advanced Search:

Said feature is extremely useful for finding specific types of games. In this case we're looking for anything cheap. In the upper-left corner of the screen find the search bar and click the Advanced Search button directly below it. You'll be presented with a variety of pull-down lists and checkboxes. First check off the gaming platforms that are of interest to you. After that you may be tempted to narrow your search down by genre, but I personally recommend you skip this part. The site doesn't classify the genre of a game as clearly as it could. Next select the point range that you'd like to use. For older systems I recommend setting the minimum point range to 100 and the maximum point range to 200. Finally we need to make sure we're avoiding the cheap games that nobody actually wants. Check off "game requested as full package" and "request queue: medium". If you're looking to do searches on generally more expensive platforms like the PSWii60 I recommend doubling the maximum point values to 400.

If you want to find games that will require no waiting you can play with the options further. Depending on the platform you're searching through; the results for cheap games may not be glorious. Still, you will find some good games worth your time. There's some great deals to be found, I assure you. Right now you can get the original Pikmin on Gamecube for 100 points. Sounds pretty great if you ask me. GameStop charges about 20 dollars for the game. Goozex is basically asking for one quarter of that price right now. The DS is a pretty great place to search if you ask me. Hotel Dusk and Contra 4 for 150 points? Yes, please!



Whether you're on a budget or not: Tread with caution and make sure to examine any game's statistics before you buy or sell. If you intend to make your Goozex account last you need to make sure you can cycle your games in and out without trouble. If you have no intention of ever getting rid of certain games this isn't an issue. However if you request games that have no demand, remember they may as well be worthless now that you have them. If nobody would bother taking them out of your hands, those games do not have any value. This is one particular reason why I stress keeping other options like GameStop and their used return policy in mind. You can nickel and dime your account to death; if out of curiosity you get a bunch of games with no demand.

You should always check the game's supply and demand. At any point you can click on a game and be taken to a stats page. On that page you can find a link that says "trading info." Go there and examine the stats given to you. You'll be presented with little grid of numbers, but what you're really interested in is the "active" columns for requests and offers; as well as "trades going on now" which you'll find lower down. These are the people who basically have active accounts. Anyone else for various reasons is unable to trade at the moment. They can be a bit of an X-Factor because later on their accounts may go active again, but it's best to concern yourself with the people who actually have working accounts.

All the info available to you will really help you decide whether you should or should not use Goozex. After examining the stats you may discover a particular game will take forever to obtain thanks to its overwhelming demand. Sometimes you'll find a particular game will take forever to get rid of thanks to the exact opposite. Now keep in mind if you wait in line long enough you're pretty much able to get anything off this site. Unless a game has absolutely non-existent traffic you will eventually be able to obtain or get rid of any given title. When you observe supply and demand, what you're actually doing is evaluating the sort of waiting that will entail.



Alright guys, It's time to go crazy. If you haven't done this yet start making some lists. Search for absolutely every game that you have an even remote amount of interest in and and request it, then put that request on hold. It doesn't matter when you'll be able to afford these games; you just want to make sure you have a place in line. Get in line as early as possible, especially if your game is hard to find. What's the point of not doing it? The only limit you have is that your hold list can only be 100 games long. Unless you're a hardcore collector there probably aren't even that many games you can think to ask for.

Make sure that you're in line to offer all the games you can too. Put everything you conceivably might not want onto your offers line, and then put it on hold. Even if you JUST received a game, add it to your offers on hold. There's a good chance by the time you're done playing it, you could be at the front of the line already thanks to that foresight. After you have your lists all prepared, there is a way to check your position in line easily. Next to every one of the games on your list there's a link called "[view stats]" and when you click on it, a pop-up comes up. If you REALLY examine this pop-up you can find out all the information available on the normal stats page we just talked about. You can find your overall place in line, the number of people with active accounts ahead of you, how many total people are in line... really you can find out just about everything you need to know about the game from this link. Just browse through your hold lists every once in a while and check out those quick stats, then when you're near the front of the line go for it.

Finally, something that people almost always seem to overlook: Set your trading regions. In your account options there is a trading regions tab. Find that and add Bermuda and Canada to your region. Trust me. The shipping costs aren't that much higher and filling out a quick little customs form at the post office isn't a very big deal. Did you ever notice on that trading info page how there's a statistic for how many times a game's been traded in the US and then how many times it'd been traded through all countries? Usually you'll notice the international stat is twice as large, if not larger. It means you have twice as many chances to get a hold of a game, and twice as many chances to get rid of a game.

It's really in your favor more than that. Imagine if there are 10 people in line ahead of you, but none of them are set to trade with Canadians. That means that if a Canadian is selling a game or requesting a game, those 10 people in front of you don't matter. That Canadian offering a copy of some incredibly rare game cannot trade with those 10 people ahead of you. They didn't set their trading regions. Thanks to that you can literally jump ahead in line. Don't worry, the games you receive will work. America, Canada, and Bermuda are all part of "Region 1." What this means is that all of us basically get the same video games. When looking for rare games especially, do this already.



From here on we've finished up on all the real essentials. Now we're going to get into some tricks that just make the experience easier. None of this stuff is necessarily important, but hell if you won't thank me for some of it. Every add-on here is a simple one-click install. Some of you people might not feel like converting Goozex points into people money all the time, and thus I present to you the Grease Monkey Firefox add-on. Next install the Goozex Script. Viola, automatic price conversion.

Firefox users, once more you are on the cutting edge of Goozex technology. Next you should install the Videogamepricecharts.com price comparison add-on. Remember that yellow "buy from Amazon" link that's on every game's individual page? Now that link is an automatic price check. A link will show up on Amazon.com that will lead you to a price chart as well as inform you of the cheapest source of the game. This is useful for two reasons: In case Goozex doesn't offer the best price on a game, and in case you want to do some flipping. Every one in a while you can find a game much cheaper outside of Goozex while there is still a demand for the game. For example, Chrono Trigger for the DS started out being worth almost 45 dollars in credit and the demand was still high for a very long time. Even after price drops and sales. For example: if you took advantage of a Black Friday sale from last year to get Chrono Trigger for 20 dollars, then traded it on Goozex for 45 in credit; suddenly you just made a profit. Remember if you ever want to do anything remotely resembling flipping: Observe the supply and demand first.



Goozex is a pretty cheap way to unload your games, but the expenses can add up. The biggest thing that'll eat into your wallet would be the shipping costs, especially if you trade off games that aren't worth much. If a game is worth 5 dollars in credit and it costs 2.50 to ship it, you're not making very much off of it. Having to buy a mailer on top of that further cuts into the cost. This is why you might want to consider the fact that all the people sending you games? Free mailers right there. With a little patchwork you can just recycle them. What I typically do is I buy some packing tape from the Post Office, then get a sheet of paper. I fold it so that it can cover all the pre-existing labels and writing on a mailer, write my own addresses, then apply tape generously. The tape you can get from the Post Office is pretty quality stuff and I've never had a problem with recycling mailers in this fashion.

You may also want to consider that the weight of the game does eat into your shipping costs. In fact the Post Office charges you in increments. The lighter your package is, the cheaper it is. If you examine a page's stats and realize that there's an active demand for one of your games as disc-only, I would go that route. It doesn't seem like you're saving much at first, but mailing 5 CDs instead of 5 full packages will add up to being easier on you. Just make sure to send your CDs in a small jewel case for protection.

Finally, this is a big one that can really help you save some money: Use the E-Mail notifications. In your account settings, there is a place to check your E-Mail Preferences. Make sure it sends you alerts on price changes in your request list. Every week you'll get a list of games that have had their value raised or lowered. It only changes 50 points every week, but this is a penny pinching, copper gold mine. What if you had 5 games, all priced at 150 points on your request list? What if you put them on hold and waited to see if they would drop to 100 points? You saved 50 points on those 5 games, which adds up to 250 points. That's $12.50 you saved just for being patient and observing the trends. No actual effort.



Consider that in all likelihood you'll get something in better condition on Goozex than from a store. Why? Because games at a store may sit on shelves, being beaten up by little savage children running through the area. Hell, even a lot of the adults that shop in game shops will treat the games poorly. On Goozex things are being mailed to you off of someone's personal shelf, but a lot of people have stated that Goozex is not for collectors. You're not obligated to mail games in good condition on Goozex, but there are ways to ensure you get games in good condition anyway.

Whenever you click on a person's username you can find their user feedback, which helps you get a general feel for who you're dealing with. If the comments all say something like "Great condition!" then you don't have a lot to worry about, and if you're just getting a cheaper game that's all I personally need. However, when you've been waiting in line for about 6 months and you're dishing out 40 dollars worth of credit, I personally care a little bit more. This is where user communication really helps out. The moment you notice one of your games has matched up with someone, send them a private message even if they haven't accepted the trade yet. Keep in mind that nobody is obligated to send you a game in good condition and be polite and friendly, and send them a message asking about the condition of the game. More often than not the user will be kind enough to let you know about the condition. If the game's not what you were hoping for keep in mind the rules behind canceling.

Whenever you cancel a game request, the person who initiated the cancel is the one who gets sent to the back of the line. Keep in mind who takes the smallest hit from initiating the cancel and ask accordingly. If you're asking for a very high demand game, ask for the seller to cancel. They'll be sent to the back of a non-existent line because anyone who offered the game has had it snatched up long ago. If you're requesting a game that doesn't have much demand, do not ask for the seller to cancel. Do it yourself. If the game is in ready supply that means you won't have to wait to try and get another copy of the game later, and that person does not have to wait behind other people to get rid of his game. In both instances I believe your copy of the game will be put on hold. Wait a little while for the seller to match up with somebody else. Then try again. Again, a little patience goes a long way. Keep in mind if you are a collector that you can also use Goozex to get rid of your items that aren't in good condition. If someone really cares, they will probably send you a message in the same way I'm advising you do right now.

And to finally finish off this guide, I present to you an absolute last resort. Sending back messed up games. Sometimes you get a game in god-awful, just unacceptable condition. You have three options based on the Goozex system. Accept the game because it technically does work, lie and say it was broken, or mail it back. Here's what you do. Give the game negative feedback and say it was broken, but leave a comment saying that the game is actually just in bad condition and you want to return it. Ask the seller to leave his address in either a private message, or in the "dispute center" that will appear whenever negative feedback is given. Get their address, absolutely get delivery confirmation and perhaps take pictures and send it back. It should really work itself out by that point.

With that I've given you all the advice I can on Goozex. Was it useful, was it not? Got any suggestions to improve the guide? In particular was I a little too liberal with using bold font? Leave a comment, folks, and please bookmark and spread this around if you think it's worthwhile.


Free Web Counter

I sit and I stare at the new toy that I had just recently acquired: a view counter showing the number of people visiting my blogs. Saying that my eyebrow is raised would be an understatement. The lack of attention my writings have been getting is record breaking. I wonder to myself if perhaps it's my own fault. Maybe my articles just aren't that interesting, maybe my titles are misleading. Then again, maybe the website is just a wasteland. Hell, maybe it's both.

This is the part where I sigh and realize to myself that everyone is playing Modern Warfare, with the occasion sprinkle of Assassin's Creed and Left 4 Dead. Though I'm sure they're great games; this turn of events depresses me on so many levels. Why exactly is this happening? Modern Warfare 2 is without a doubt one of the most successful games ever made at this point, and yet the company that supports it is one of the most reviled in the industry. Is this game really so revolutionary that it makes everyone jump off their couch to go throw money at a company that supposedly just about everyone dislikes? I don't know. I never played either Modern Warfare. As a casual observer these games look stunningly similar. Is there some particular reason that nobody could have kept playing the original release?

Actually, I know a good chunk of the reason. I just went ahead and asked some of my customers. Their response, "Well all my friends are playing it." The people who don't even necessarily like these types of games are buying it out of a feeling of obligation. It seems nobody can escape this title. As an outsider I feel like part of a devastated civilization right now. Like I'm in an empty town from some Twilight Zone episode. When people aren't playing Modern Warfare they want to talk about it. Even the Monthly Musing topic right now was made because of this very game. I feel like quite the outsider.

As a person who occupies much of his time writing for this blog as a hobby, I question if I should continue or not right now. The quality of blog posts in general seems to have significantly dropped, and so has the amount of attention bestowed onto them. It very well could be me simply being jaded. I'm not necessarily angry about the lack of attention. For the most part I write for my own enjoyment. I don't write on popular subjects and expect a somewhat small response. I'm just disheartened that so many of the people I like to spend my down-time around on this site with are pretty much missing.

I could try to approach this with a business mentality, similar to the ones that Activision itself may use. I could purposely approach topics that would spark more interest. I could litter my blogs with images and make them significantly shorter to help catch more peoples' attention. I'm sure I could do a lot of things if I really wanted to get more attention. That's not really the point, though. More than anything else I'm just disheartened right now. I think I'll continue to write, but I won't be tossing anything out into the wild while nobody is here to read them. It feels rather pointless.

Man, even my precious forums are pretty dead. I'm gonna go enjoy some of my retro collection and keep in touch with the people from the site I can. I'll be waiting for the day when I can see some of you folks again. Catch you later.


HTML Hit Counter

And so we continue to give you a little personal insight on the entrants to the Fatal Destructoid tournament. Zoel is a crazy import gamer. How crazy? He refuses to advance to the next level of Ikaruga until after he's gotten an S+ rank. He's likely somewhat infamous around the blogs for his crazy import collection. English happens to not be his first language, but I find it ironic that despite being an import gamer that first language is not Japanese. Some of you may not realize that Zoel's import skills came extremely close to impacting your gaming life; should you have played Persona 4. Let us build up some backstory:

If I recall correctly; long ago Zoel just couldn't wait to get his hands on a copy of Final Fantasy VIII, so he did what ANY reasonable child would do and imported a copy and modified his Playstation. Since then he's been importing his way through various games, being an especially big fan of Umihara Kawase. He actually got me interested in the series actually. Crazy shit, I'm sure he'll link to a video himself. That aside, Zoel was actually writing an FAQ for Persona 4 on GameFAQs. His only motivation was a measly piece of spare cash that the site was offering to anyone who would make the first guide, and thus he answered the call.

DoubleJump books was so impressed by his guide that they actually asked him if he'd like a job, and may or may not have used his own guide to help build theirs. As Zoel lives in Canada that unfortunately did not pan out, but for all you people that have a Persona 4 strategy guide right now: Zoel almost got on to the staff for it. If nothing else I bet some of you used his GameFAQs guide. His is the very first one on the page.

We fast forward to present day Destructoid, where Zoel trains to better himself at some King of Fighters. Lately in the chat we've discovered that many of the entrants are shmup fans aside from Zoel. Just yesterday Zoel, BulletMagnet, and KD_Alpha were chatting up shooters quite avidly. I was actually pretty happy with the way they were using our community chatroom. I didn't want to just train everyone at fighting games, I wanted them to socialize too. Destructoid in itself is very much so founded on its community, and I'm hoping that Fatal Destructoid will continue to bring the site's fighting game sub-culture together more.

Zoel entered the tournament hoping for a greater challenge and I'm hoping to deliver on it. We've actually been training in games beyond King of Fighters '98, and the advice I've been giving him seems to have very quickly added up. Before he was losing to me quite handily, but has since been evolving as a player and hit me with a real stunner yesterday. He got a winning streak on me. I beat him some 8 times in a row when suddenly he started giving a very solid retaliation. He fought cautiously and make sure to consider each of my characters' strengths and styles, and I actually had to fight to start winning again. In the video below you can see the struggle that occurred. Shingo and Leona respectively fought hard to win the rounds at the last minute, but Zoel managed to keep them at bay and claim victory. I present to you Zoel's progress:



It was actually a little shocking. Near the end of these matches you might see me trying to make a comeback. It wasn't until about this time that I realized, "Oh shit, this is getting serious." Zoel had been putting my advice to good use, especially with how to more effectively use Kyo. I'm now at a serious disadvantage, as the majority of his team is Top-Tier and the majority of my own team is Mid-Tier. I won't be making excuses, though. I intend to up my own game and push Zoel harder, and also use it as good practice to wake up my sleepy Saisyu. He has been a weak link in my team, as I've been in a slump with him lately. I may not have lost these matches had I come in with a stronger third character. These matches may have been helping him to strengthen his Athena as well. I don't know if it was my advice or not, but he's been putting her to much better use than he had before.

I have little advice to offer Zoel at the moment. The fact that you can observe us shuffling around and trying to read eachother's movements means that in terms of strategy he's picked up about as much as he can from me. We've reached the point where the game is becoming more mental, and victory will be determined by just as much how well we use our characters as how well we predict eachother and deal with pressure.

At this point it will simply be an effort to continue training his intuition and to use his characters more effectively, the same as I'll be doing. You can find and challenge Zoel in the Fatal Destructoid Chatroom. Even if you're not a member of the tournament we accept all callers, and Zoel plays a variety of games. If you have any interest in joining Fatal Destructoid: King of Fighters 98 let us know. You can leave a comment or stop on by the chat room.


Free Web Counter

Free Web Counter

Wryviews were created in the face of the illogical manner in which video game reviewers score games. In principle they are meant to strike out the bias inherent in most video game reviews by judging a game on what it aspires to be, as opposed to what the reviewer regards it should be. They are meant to inform the readers, and especially so not try to make decisions for them.

Today I'm met with the first game that could very well get a genuinely low score from me. As people who'd been following the series know, I've been primarily reviewing very well received cult-classic games. The only really controversial score I'd given was a 3/5 to Beyond Good and Evil, which I feel I was very well justified in giving. Now however, I'm doing a mini-Wryview of Final Fantasy V for the Gameboy Advance. It's a mini-Wryview because I couldn't bring myself to finish the game. Let it be said immediately that I don't actually dislike this game, but I simply fell victim to one of the common trappings of being impartial to my current endeavor. Though the game was constantly in my pocket and I had many opportunities to play it; I just wouldn't do it after about the 15 hour mark.

Everyone experiences this eventually, especially with RPGs: That time when they want to be able to say they'd completed a game, but find it has no real ability to call them back to it once the console's been turned off. As I write this I have to keep in mind that this game is created with fanservice greatly in mind, and it is in fact a great piece of fanservice. I'd heard the Playstation 1 version of Final Fantasy IV was riddled with loading times, and I can imagine the PS1 port of this game likewise suffered such a problem. Likewise this game is very much centered around oldschool gameplay, and thus the grind these games are famous for is rather well suited to being adapted into a handheld timewaster. Some might argue that re-releasing this game was unnecessary, but even not being an especially big Final Fantasy fan I see little reason to really complain. They created a definitive version of the game on an arguably more suitable platform. Certainly I could criticize some of Square Enix's decisions, but this actually seemed like a no-brainer.

In itself I don't really have any problem with the game being oldschool, but certainly being "oldschool" in itself doesn't really justify making an uncreative game. Final Fantasy V isn't an example of such a thing, though. I certainly have some gripes with the game, but if nothing else it really try to be creative with its trademark Job System. I do have some further thoughts on the title, though. I feel since I did personally take on the task of deciding to review the game that I should at least somewhat follow through. Let's go over a few individual aspects of the title:

In regards to plot this game isn't going to really surprise anyone TOO much. We have four sacred crystals which protect the world and four destined heroes who meet each other within the first half an hour of the game. Rather cliche. Our four main characters at least have some personality, though. This is actually one of the things I really like about the game. The characters themselves are fairly comical. They have simple personalities but they lend themselves well to entertaining situations. For example we have a brisk and hearty, but forgetful old man; often surprising people with his physical dexterity but also being the brunt of many jokes. While the old character in a party is usually supposed to be a mentor or nagger or sorts, Galuf doesn't really fit that stereotypical role. Next of all things we have a brash and crude female pirate named Faris. When she's cleaned up a little she's stunningly beautiful, but her personality is extremely crash and if you don't like it she'd sooner probably punch you in the gut than change.

Just like the plot itself these characters are really simple, but the game embraces the fact they aren't especially complex with silly lines like "Get away from her you piratey... pirate!" Likewise there actually is a significant plot that exists in the game, but in favor of putting emphasis on gameplay you could say there's little actual exposition. How should I explain this? Basically shit just happens. You know how some games might take some time to build up to the events, toss in some foreshadowing, or maybe draw out a conversation on occasion? Final Fantasy V basically says, "Fuck that. Your best friend died and on to the next dungeon!" It's very abrupt. The actual skeleton to the story is there, but the meat has been tossed out in favor of putting you on the battlefield more often. It's one of those cases where perhaps the developers felt it was better to leave some things to the players' imagination. The job system itself is actually what brings me to this conclusion.

Graphically the game lends itself to this style too, with the characters being very low detailed but colorful, and often making small gestures as opposed to speaking with eachother. It doesn't sound like much but it's more subtle than a lot of games tend to offer. There's not a whole lot to discuss beyond this, though. Final Fantasy V is an old, relatively simple game. Once we cover the battle system we're just about done, so that said:

The combat is entirely what this game is about. Everything takes a back seat to the gameplay. At the time it had come out the game actually had a lot going for it too. The Active Time Battle System was actually extremely new and unlike anyone had really seen before in RPGs, and the Job System had come back from Final Fantasy III with refinements and non-generic main characters. Had we gotten this in America instead of Final Fantasy: Mystic Quest, I feel the public would have been much more impressed. Of course we have frequent random battles in this game, but surprisingly you're often given a ship of some sort on the world map that lets you avoid them. Likewise the dungeons in this game can be very very short. The abrupt style of storytelling I mentioned penetrates to the dungeons themselves, and once again lends itself well to handheld gaming. Some dungeons really can take a mere 15 minutes, and sometimes there's no dungeon at all. Just a quick boss battle. The encounter rate is very high, though. Clearly if you dislike these sort of games you already know to stay away, so let's not concern ourselves too much with that. The battle system remains solid, even if at this point it's a bit on the generic side. The real attraction and I'd have to say crux of this game is the Job System.

In essence you're always able to choose your characters' appearance and abilities. If you have a character who is currently using Black Magic everything about them changes. Their magic stats will raise, their physical defense will decrease, and they'll need to be given new equipment. They essentially become a whole new character upon changing their job. Likewise if a character becomes proficient in their current job, they're actually able to carry over one of their skills into another. Your character that you'd chosen to be proficient in Black Magic can likewise still have Black Magic while being a Warrior, and likewise when you become proficient as a Warrior you can transfer some kind of Warrior skill over if you decide to become a Black Mage again. Of course not every combination is smart. Even though you'd given your Warrior character Black Magic, that doesn't mean they have a high magic stat to put it to any use. Their spells will probably be borderline useless, but there's much more effective combinations to use instead.

It's actually a really neat concept. You can choose to make your characters appear as they might be expected to or otherwise. For example, Galuf the hearty old man might be expected to be a Barbarian or some other kind of physical character. If you feel it's more interesting that he be a Bard though, that's totally up to you. Likewise there is a certain inherent fun in being imaginative with your choices. A Bard who can create afterimages of himself like a ninja for example is a very novel idea. It's really all about imagination here. There's a certain appeal to playing pretend like this in the same way you might have done as a kid. The Job System is also what I consider the game's greatest flaw, though. Aside from the Job System everything about the gameplay had already been done, and this game puts all of its focus on gameplay. You could say the goal of the game was to create a suitable environment for the Job System itself to flourish. I really could argue that the Job System IS the game thanks to the fact that the developers actively push the emphasis of the game on combat.

In itself that's not a bad thing at all. The Job System really is a novel concept that I enjoy, but what I don't enjoy are the design flaws. You only have two skill slots. One you have no control over. It's determined by your job. The second is a custom slot that you can choose for yourself. The problem is that not all skills are created equal. In the face of being able to use Healing Magic, why would you want some sort of paltry skill like being able to run faster on the world map? The game isn't easy. You need to use your skills efficiently, while at the same time many of the skills you have access to are the opposite. Likewise many of the jobs themselves really aren't that good. Often they rely on somewhat random effects, such as the dancer class. Really the smart way to do things is to simply make a run of the mill Final Fantasy team. Something along the lines of Warrior, Black Mage, White Mage, ect. I really didn't want to do this, but to get through the game it became a greater necessity as time went on.

What it really comes down to is that while playing this game, I found decreasing motivation to use the more interesting jobs because they weren't actually useful. In itself this almost feels like it defeats the purpose of the game. I actually did enjoy what of the plot I saw, but it wasn't strong enough to pull me back in. Everything here is competent, and certainly I did not dislike my time with the title. Still, I wasn't compelled. The score of the game will have nothing to do with that, though. Rather I just can't help but regard the Job System as something of a creative failure and have to score accordingly. Again, keep in mind I did not finish this game. My evaluation is hardly absolute and were I genuinely being paid to write this I would have no right to push out an unfinished product. But based on the information I have at hand, I've made up my mind. Thinking it over moreso than anything else this game is basically just an oldschool RPG. Its goals are modest and certainly this game will bring some happiness to some people out there. Thus I give my score:

3 out of 5 stars

A 3 is the mark of a game that stands as a solid effort. Though the game may be exceptional in some regards and have good ideas, the author believes it did not grasp the full potential of those ideas. It is merely a sign that he feels there are better things to come from this concept. By no means is a 3 the mark of a poor, unenjoyable, or even average game. It merely means he'd like to see the concepts further developed.

In short: The reviewer's calling this a worthwhile experience... even though he didn't beat it.


Free Web Counter

Though this is not the ideal method and will not be as useful for training or during the tournament, it's possible to join the Fatal Destructoid chat by simply going to the online IRC available on Destructoid itself and typing "/join #fataldestructoid"

As anyone who's been following Fatal Destructoid knows, our community tournament is more about training than it is about competing. The main problem is so many of the entrants use different communications methods. For us to really accomplish what Fatal Destructoid is all about we need full on universal chat method. Senisan had a great idea using an online chat, but we need something HARDER, BETTER, FASTER, STRONGER *BEEP BOOP CATCHY MUSIC.* While I do enjoy training you guys solo, I'll be frank when I say I don't have the time to give you guys the proper practice you need to really up your game. Too many of you bitches. A lot of my personal time is taken up writing promotional materials and The King of Fighters Love Letter. You guys have no idea how much time and research I put into that series. When I go into research mode I have about 5 different windows in Firefox open all cross referencing information. Phoenix Wright ain't got shit on me, son.

Anyway, a lot of my tournament contestants have heard me ramble about setting up a chat channel, and thankfully I have friends who could help me make it possible. The channel will improve with time as we set up new features, but for now we have what we truly, really need: A way to socialize with eachother properly. This shit isn't just about competition, guys. I want all of us to have a chance to be friendly with our fellow fighting game fans. I gladly present to you the Fatal Destructoid chat channel, which we will utilize with mIRC. Anyone not in the tournament is by all means invited to come along. If you've got some fighting game love, I really doubt anyone is gonna object to you stopping by for a chat. I know it's gonna be a bit of effort setting up a program you guys quite possibly don't know anything about, so I've set up a simple tutorial. So you don't need to go fumbling through the menus, the straight up keyboard shortcuts are in bold. Read the bold text, evaluate the images, and in no time at all I promise you that you'll be chatting and setting up training sessions with your fellow contestants.

Install mIRC if you haven't already. Don't worry, the program is free and doesn't actually require that you register with it. The program may bug you slightly when you boot the program up, but for its intended purpose we'll be leaving mIRC on as often as possible (24/7 is probably a bit much, but we'll see.) That means the program won't have many chances to bug you in the first place. Take THAT, hungry hungry programmers.

ALT+O: Category -> CONNECT


If memory serves this is the absolute first window you will encounter upon installing mIRC. It'll ask you for your name, e-mail, and some aliases. Go ahead and fill that information out. Make sure to use the same alias you do on Destructoid itself. I forget at this point, but mIRC will probably ask you to pick a server before you can continue. We're going to be using DynastyNet, the same server Destructoid uses for its own chat. In fact it'll be easy as shit to spend time in the main D-Toid chat at the same time for anyone interested. When you're done setting up shop for Fatal Destructoid just type " /join #destructoid " in our own chat room window.

If you can't find this window, use the keyboard shortcut in bold above.

ALT+E
or
ALT+O: Category -> CONNECT -> SERVERS


Find DynastyNet on the list and select Random server. Not much else to this part. Join the server and once again check the shortcuts above if you can't find this window.

ALT+J: Type #fataldestructoid and join.
or
Type " /join #fataldestructoid " into the DynastyNet server window.


This window should pop up automatically as soon as you join the DynastyNet server, but once again there's keyboard shortcuts above if you can't find your way here. Simply type #fataldestructoid into the textbox and you will be well on your way to entering the chat. From here on we're just going to set up a few options that will make the room MUCH more useful for its intended purpose.

ALT+K


You should already be in the room and able to chat with everyone. First thing we're going to do is make sure that you can read everything well. Personally I don't like mIRC's default color setup. I much prefer changing my settings to placid hues. You can manually edit your own color scheme but I don't think that's necessary. Go ahead and skip this part if you're fine with the colors as they are. Absolutely do not skip the next steps, though.

ALT + O: DISPLAY -> OPTIONS -> CLICK THE BUTTON THAT SAYS TRAY


At this menu there's a checkbox that says "place mIRC in tray when minimized." If that is checked absolutely uncheck it and make sure it's not active. The next option we change requires we do this first.

ALT + O: IRC -> OPTIONS - > FLASH ON MESSAGE CHECKBOXES


Here we have another set of checkboxes that will make mIRC's taskbar button flash if any messages are sent in the chatroom. Basically what this means is that if anyone wants to have a training session or just wants to talk in general, you don't need to constantly monitor the room. Instead that flashing will probably catch your eye.

ALT + R


This is the final step and the beginning of greater things to come. With scripts such as these we'll be able to set up special features for the chat that'll help move the tournament along. We're starting simple because the people helping me would overload my brain otherwise. This is an extremely simple script that will simply allow you to type " !WryGuy" for example to have mIRC suddenly start beeping at me whether I'm looking at the window or not. When you seriously need someone's attention, this is how it'll be done. Unless we find a better way to do it later.

Type ALT + R and copy and paste this code:

on *:TEXT:!Wry*:* { beep 8 }

Then change "Wry" to your own nickname. After which people will be able to contact you in the method I described. So long as everyone does this we'll be able to just type !+nickname to get a specific person's attention.

With that we're done. If you followed the instructions you're in the Fatal Destructoid chat with all the other entrants and have access to eachother to talk and play at all times. Please stay in the chat as often as possible. 24/7 if you don't object. Even if you're not a member of the tournament and just want other people to play fighters with I won't object to you stopping by. Hopefully if you do, you'll consider joining a Fatal Destructoid tourney?

I will note that I totally started playing Daft Punk the moment I typed out "harder, better, faster, stronger" into this blog window. Go ahead and beep me when you join, guys. !Wry it up.


Free Web Counter

Well, bitches; I just got done selling 400 of you asshats your Modern Warfare 2. I have no idea why I put up with you guys, but enough about me. Today it's all about squirrelyg, one of my Fatal Destructoid '98 contestants. Squirrely was one of the very first contestants that entered the ring for my King of Fighters '98 tournament. I've had various personal chats with my contestants and learned a little bit about him prior to writing this. For one he's one of the more avid SNK fans around on the site that I've seen but has unfortunately fallen victim to something very common for those of his ilk: ain't nobody to fucking play his games with. Prior to Fatal Destructoid I do believe Squirrely mostly subjected himself to playing against the computer simply for his enjoyment of SNK fighters like the the King of Fighters series. As such he's been one of the most excited about this whole tournament from the get go. This initial match was made a few weeks back, while the next will be from a few days ago:



As all of you who've followed the tournament so far know, I'm not looking to do these tournaments to make myself look good. I'll be hosting these tournaments for various reasons: To promote the King of Fighters Love Letter which will in turn inform people more about the SNK as a company, as well as the King of Fighter's storyline; To get people playing SNK fighters with other people in situations where they may normally play games they're more comfortable with; and finally to increase the overall skill level of Destructoid as a whole.

I wish to foster a stronger competitive scene at Destructoid. Not so that we can be assholes who talk about how other people are "scrubs" and how anyone who isn't a tournament level player is a chump. Fuck that noise. I simply want to foster the spirit of competition and brotherhood that can come with playing these sort of games in a friendly environment. I want to bring out the real spirit of what makes fighting games great: bettering yourself as a player because you're enjoying yourself and your time with the people you play against. That's what this shit is all about. That's why in Fatal Destructoid I am not a contestant. I train the entrants. I chat with them and advise them about their playstyles. I do my best to become the social medium that allows them to have access to the other contestants at all times possible so they can spar with eachother. I take personal time to train the farther behind contestants in whatever I feel they need to know. Squirrely himself started out as one of the weakest contestants in the tournament. To be frank he was a bit of a pushover. Remember he was playing against computers for the most part.

Some of out training sessions could get pretty weird. He may not have noticed that I would often pick similar characters to his in order to let him see how another person uses the character. I would change my playstyle from exceedingly offensive or defensive to force him to adapt. Sometimes I would just show him how to do something and then tell him to repeat it in front of me about 20 times without actually giving a fuck about who won the round or not. I'm proud to say that Squirrely has likewise shown the most improvement. He is now proper competition for the top players like Zoel and Senisan. That very same spirit I was talking about is strong in the lad and I'm hoping his example will help everyone push themselves to become better. Let's demonstrate his improvement:



Let's make one thing clear: Both of us were rusty in the initial video made some weeks back. I was personally very uncoordinated and making a lot of pointless movements. I'm still doing a little bit of that right now, though not as much. What this means is that though he's improved and is playing much better since last time, so am I. I'm not a contestant in the tournaments but I am a final challenge that you have to overcome to claim a grand prize. Sure you'll win and get some prizes, but if you train yourself up to be able to beat me then you might get something that personally came from my own wallet as a sort of thanks. I want myself to be regarded as a serious challenge. The obstacle you'll have to overcome once we get down to the actual tournament itself. It's for that reason that I'll continue to get back my old skills and I'm hoping that the contestants will start training with eachother as much as possible, to overcome their common enemy of sorts in me. Rest assured, it's hard to contest that I'm overall the biggest challenge in the tournament right now. I'm hoping some of you are up knocking my arrogant ass out.

Since this time Squirrely's cast of characters has primarily remained the same, though he has picked up Orochi Chris instead of Normal Chris as one of his regulars. A very wise choice. Normal Chris is a low-damage speed character. He relies on being quick and hard to predict but has little power. Long ago he was considered a top-tier character. Orochi Chris--his alternate version. KOF 98 has about 10 of those--has since usurped that and is quite possibly the single best character in the game, only sacrificing some of his speed and gaining much more powerful attacks and the ability to fight at mid-range. I should note KOF 98 is a very well balanced game. The conceptions of which characters are the best have changed with time, as this game is still being played competitively in countries like Japan.

His Orochi Chris does need improvement, though. As you see in both cases moreso than his other characters, that character is the one getting demolished. His main problem seems to be that he seeks to get in as close as possible using slide kicks and Chris' extremely good jumping Heavy, but once he's close in he doesn't do very much. It may suit Squirrely to start utilizing more of Orochi Chris' mid range attacks. Though Squirrely is still losing to me in this video, the real showcase of his improvement is the fact that he's making comebacks with his other characters. When he's feeling the pressure he's now playing it smarter and fighting with some of the absolute safest methods he can think of. He's improving his execution too, managing to link weak attacks into a combo. I'll admit that such things aren't my strength. When I'm not concentrating I will not do that and focus on hit and run tactics. In that way Squirrely may soon have a real edge over me.

Here's to future improvement. Just for the hell of it I conclude with one of my trademark moves that I hope haunts so many of my contestants' nightmares:



SHINGO KEEEEEEEIIICK!!!

Maaaad fucking props to vinilinx of Deviant Art for making this.


Free Web Counter