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X-Blades Review
VoyToid | 10:48 PM on 02.09.2009 12 comments




So I just played this game for about 3 hours and I have to say I'm not very impressed. It tries to be Tomb Raider and God Of War at the same time, but in the end it kind of fails at both and just ends up sucking. Bah, ok maybe it's not THAT bad, but still...

The Good
- No matter how you slice it, Ayumi is one total hottie. She looks great and moves nicely. Gotta love being in control of her every move.
- The soundtrack is bad ass. Some sweet beats and tight grooves definitely go well with the action.
- Environments look pretty. Lots of shiny effects. Fast action with some cool slow motion moments here and there.

The Bad
- Not enough ass kicking. I mean, you kill a lot of stuff, but the combat system is really repetitive. It's a total one button mash fest. As you kill stuff you charge up your special move meter and you can do two fancy moves. These get old really fast though, especially since when you fight boses, you will use these two moves a couple hundred zillion times. Mash mash mash, shoot flame, mash mash mash, stomp ground, mash mash... you just never really feel accomplished. You can purchase more moves later, but they really don't seem very promising.
- Yeah, you get guns too, but they're only good for shooting bats and little crawlers. Pretty much useless against the bigger baddies. Spices up the mash fest a little, but that's about it... I just want more from those guns!
- You kill the same thing over and over again. Seriously it's always these little raptors, bigger raptor dudes, freaky flying hoodie wearing zombie dudes, and big fat insects. For three hours that's all I got. Lame!
- The game is divided into areas where you get attacked by waves of enemies. Once you clear all the waves, you get to move on to the next area (it's kind of like Gears Of War.) The thing is, each area is pretty much like an arena, so there really is nothing to explore. All you do is kill stuff, then move into another room, and kill more stuff. It gets boring FAST. There's nothing really to break up the pace. There was one segment where you had to dodge these spikes for a few minutes, but it really didn't do anything for me.
- No tomb raiding. There's some tombs but you don't really raid 'em. You just walk around and kill stuff. The game is massively linear. No puzzles, no anything. I know it's not Tomb Raider, but it really wants to be a Tomb Raider.
- AI just charges and tries to rape you. Very artificial and not intelligent.

The Ugly
- I was able to beat a boss just by standing there and mashing my special fireball move button for 3 minutes. I shouldn't be able to do that! It didn't take much thought either, it was like "uhhhh I'll go right there, and now you raptor dudes can suck it cause you bitches can't climb! Hah!" So bogus : / the place who made this game needs better testers.
- I had to repeat this one same area twice and it was way lame. You have to destroy 7-8 big orbs while these flying demons attack you. In other words, what you do is hump a big red ball until it disappears, and then move on to the next one until you run out of balls. This lasts for like 10 minutes and it's just so boring! Why!?

I would probably give this game a 5-6 out of 10. It could have been awesome, but it's not : / if you're really craving some Ayumi action, good luck and have fun, but don't tell me I didn't warn ya.



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8 comments | showing # 1 to 8
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Phalanxxx's Avatar - Comment posted on 02/10/2009 03:13
Phalanxxx
Awww... I have this pre-ordered... don't tell me it's rubbish!
It comes out on the 20th here, so don't spoil it XD
Qraze's Avatar - Comment posted on 02/10/2009 08:08
Qraze
figures. now we know why they were only sending out screenshot after screenshot, hoping a thong alone will make us buy it.

i still have and love heavenly sword, the game did have amazingly beautiful graphics, a great story, amazing bosses. a tad short but when you turn the sixasis controls off it makes it really fun controlling Kai. and i would bone Nariko with my demonic sword in a second.
Naim Master's Avatar - Comment posted on 02/10/2009 13:53
Naim Master
I don't know how could anyone think this game looks good , it's a ultra generic action game with soft softcore porn ...
Dr Milkdad's Avatar - Comment posted on 02/10/2009 16:09
Dr Milkdad
These guys did Two Worlds I think, so that's enough reason for me not to buy this.
Malovane's Avatar - Comment posted on 02/10/2009 17:36
Malovane
if you don't like softcore hentai and x-blades, then i think you like the following

Holyetheline's Avatar - Comment posted on 02/10/2009 17:54
Holyetheline
I figured this game would be mediocre at best. Nice review. I won't play X-Blades.
Jonathan Holmes's Avatar - Comment posted on 02/10/2009 18:43
Jonathan Holmes
Aw, that's disappointing! It was fun for the 3 minutes I played at the NY CC.
Red TheHaze Veron's Avatar - Comment posted on 02/10/2009 19:18
Red TheHaze Veron
I've yet to play the game but the reason I hate it is for the character design.
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