My school isnít bad. Nor is it great. It fits right in the middle of mediocrity. The school isnít a prime example of excellence or a defective environment of undesirables. Itís just there. Itís not ugly or pretty. Itís not clean or dirty. The school simply exists. In many ways the school is exactly like me. You see, I wasnít a bad student, but a boring one. I had a few acquaintances in school. I care about my appearance enough to make an effort to look presentable, but did nothing with it. I go to class, sit in the back and space out. I cut class constantly and arrived late for almost every class I had. I really didnít have any excuse for this. I just walked slow and spend too much time in the bathroom. I got along with most of my teachers. The teachers, like the school, are a mix bag of everything. I had teachers who absolutely love their jobs and others who took the job simply because some of them are a bunch of failed artists hungry for a paycheck.
I sat in class and did nothing. I would stare at the peeling dirty white walls and space out Ė this is my typical routine in most of my classes. I didnít spend much time thinking about my future. I know I should have done my work, go to class early, listen, and participate, but I didnít. I wish I had a better reason, but none exist. This, without question, was my existence; however, this existence all changed my senior year.
I never really met anyone who shared the same interests as me until my last year in high school. Surprisingly it was video game music that brought a couple of gamers together. I had an endless amount of mix CDs of recorded game music. You see, I didnít have any money to buy a soundtrack or import the ones that I wanted, so what I did was record the game music from the television. I made CDs of Metal Gear Solid 2
, Final Fantasy X
, and countless others. Besides Radiohead, video game music was my high school soundtrack.
I met my friend Jonny in history class. He was a short chubby white kid with a heavy Brooklyn accent. My bag was open on top of my desk with two Radiohead albums clearly visible. The iPod recently came out, and I didnít have any money to buy one, so it wasnít uncommon to still carry CDs with you. Jonny whispered asking me what my favorite Radiohead song was. I said it was The National Anthem
and his eyes grew bright with excitement. Suddenly our teacher told us to shut up and we didnít talk until class was over.
After class, we both walked to the cafeteria talking about Radiohead until he asked if I listen to any video game music. I told him I did and showed him the CD I made of Metal Gear Solid 2
. I told him I recorded all the songs off my television and he laughed knowing what I did was ridiculous. He said he had the actual soundtrack and his brother knew a way of ripping game music from the disc. He said he would make me a copy and a mix tape of other game music the next day. That afternoon in the cafeteria was the first time I had a deep conversation about video games. The cafeteria was small and dim; it was overcrowded with students, but we somehow found a little spot to talk. We talked about the music, gameplay, and story of all our favorite games until class started. I was stunned and impressed by his knowledge. A challenge I thought, someone who can rival my useless video game trivia. Jonny also introduced me to the world of anime and would later lend me Akira
It was dark and raining that night. I sat on the chair in the middle of my room trying to pop a pimple on my forehead. I lived in a small, damp apartment complex in New York. The walls of my room are dirty white and most of the paint was peeling off. I saw my bag in the corner of the door and remembered Jonny burned me a CD of videogame music. I sat on my bed and played the first track. I recognized the tune from Final Fantasy X
. I quickly went to the next track and was greeted with a loud bang. I closed my eyes and imagined a hero in some distant land fighting off monsters. Jonny has kindly written down each songs name and from what game theyíre from. Shadow of the Colossus
The song is titled Monstrous People
and I fell in love. It was epic. It was amazing. It got my heart pumping. I would turn the volume of my CD player as loud as I can and imagine some great fantasy fight between some unknown soldier and a demonic beast. I reached for the CD case to see if any more music from the game was present. Only 3 of the 17 songs are from Shadow of the Colossus
. He also included songs from Ico
and other music from games I never heard of. He did include some J-POP which I didnít care for, but I did love the rest.
The next day I greeted him with a big smile and started to talk about all the good music he burned for me. Jonny and I were best friends that year. We spent most days together talking about whatever interested us. Unfortunately I havenít seen Jonny since high school, I donít know why. We just drifted apart; its funny how things always end up, but what can you do. I lost all contact with him, but the memories are enough to keep me satisfied. Itís important to oneís self when you can talk to someone who understands you and share the same interests. You donít feel alone or weird. Being able to express yourself without embarrassment or ridicule is an amazing feeling and one that I cherish with my friends. The internet has made it easier in finding like minded individuals. Most, if not all, my friends donít really share my interest in video game and thatís fine. I have my Dtoid friends to talk to about that. Keeping and maintaining a healthy friendship is essential to a happy life and I think Iím doing pretty well.
Iíve only been an active member for about 5 or 6 months, but itís good to be part of a community who understands you. I never knew something like this can actually happen. I used to look down at people, who had internet friends or met people through the internet, but we live in different times now and this is becoming the norm. By reading blogs I get to not only know your likes and dislikes, but know you as a person. Dtoid has allowed me to make more friends than I could have ever imagined. We have fan fiction about our community members, and even music for each one, too! I donít know of any other website that does this, but this is pretty fuckiní awesome.
To the many people I PM and Tweet to; you guys are my friends. To anyone who reads and comments on my blogs, thank you! I may have never met you in person, but knowing you from your writing is enough to generate an opinion. I feel like I'm rambling here, so I'll just leave and give a THANK YOU to everyone.