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For the next sixty seconds, this station will momentarily drop the veneer of sarcasm and wit to deliver a few genuine sentiments of appreciation for the readers, writers and creators of Destructoid.

At the risk of sounding phony or like a kiss-up, I do really want to thank all of the Destructoid editors and staff members who have been so kind to me. I'm completely floored by the genuine sense of community that Destructoid has fostered. As I'm sure many of you know, Destructoid's become sort of a big deal. They could have let the success go to their heads. It would have been easy for them to back down from their unique editorial stance, incredible sense of humor, and passion for the public gaming hordes (that's us). They could be passed out right now in pools of their own vomit in swanky backstage dressing rooms from an overdose of self-confidence and too many bumps of booger sugar. But they're here with us, day in and day out, trying to make the site as great as it can be, creating new community features for us to use and participating in our tiny little side blogs as if what the readers had to say were actually important. And trust me, after spending a little bit of time with Greybush and some of the editors recently, the Destructoid community is very important to them. They referred to many of us by name in conversations and were actually aware of what we've been writing about. This isn't a joke for them. They believe in this website and they believe all of us have an integral part in making it as great as it is.

The immortal electro lemon said it best: "They can party. Because they don't take everything so seriously. They're not Joystiq. They know people will enjoy news more if they decide to make it entertaining, humorous, or more relative. Kotaku does the same, but not with everything, and as said before, they've got no community. Nothing to keep them there, besides the stories. And where's the fun in that?"

So I think I just gave myself cooties from that little love-in. I'm gonna have to go skin a deer or drive a truck so I can feel like a man again. I promise I'll do my best to do right by the rest of the C-bloggers at PAX.

Me, Greybush, Charliesuh, Colette, .tiff, HuskyHog, CTZ & Cocomo at the Destructoid after-hours party.

9:09 AM on 08.10.2007

"I used to do drugs. I still do drugs. But I used to, too." (RIP)

Wired has an old article I stumbled across on their Science Discoveries page, entitled LSD: The Geek's Wonder Drug? The story mostly covers the 100 birthday celebration of the Swiss chemist who discovered LSD, Albert Hofmann. There's also a brief discussion with Kevin Herbert, an employee of Cisco Systems. Apparently, Kevin likes to sip a little "battery acid" whenever he's confronted with a difficult programming task. He claims the experience widens his mind and helps him create new solutions to old problems.

You see, I have this friend who sometimes plays video games when he's on drugs. He's found that certain games really lend themselves to the drug experience. He's told me that Rez is great on Vicodin, Ikaruga works well when you're stoned, multiplayer Jeopardy is more fun when you're drunk, and Tetris Attack is overwhelmingly impossible when you're tripping.

Look, we know Workman drinks. The man's intaken so many cubic meters of alcohol he's started donating his extra chest hair to orphanages full of scrawny teenage boys.

So we know we've got that base covered.

But what about everyone else? Do you keep the same odd company that I do? Do you have any friends who report their EXTRA curricular game experiences to you?

Don't worry Mom. It's just a humor piece. Promise.

File this under capital N for "Not as exciting as it sounds". My first thoughts when I read the message from Nintendo in my Wii's inbox was: Sweet mother of Jesus! A demo! I'll be playing Corruption tonight!

Then my hopes deflated when I realized it was just two low-res movies that looked like enlarged youtube videos.

Interesting in that it is the first time Nintendo has actually let us download a preview for a game directly onto our Wiis. Hopefully, there will be a lot more of this, including for virtual console games. The horrible quality didn't do much for me, but Nintendo dribbles out so little to us that I was kind of happy just to get anything.

The preview page promises two more video updates on August 13th.

To the sound of crickets apparently.

The publisher 505 Games announced that they've agreed on a deal for Office Create to develop the sequel to the popular casual game.

Remember that really fun time when we broke 8 virtual eggs over that fake bowl to make cookies we couldn't eat on our television? Me neither.

Here's a video of me playing the first Cooking Mama game. NSFW.

6:23 AM on 08.09.2007

Since everyone around seems to have Metroid fever, myself included, I thought I'd post this little game that mashes up Mega Man with Samus Aran's old stomping grounds.

This might be old news to most people, seeing as how I remember first playing it around a year ago. But it was fun to revisit during my rampage through all the old Metroids, spiritually preparing myself for August 27th when that atomic bomb of joy named Corruption gets dropped.

Play it at GameZhero

You can finally use your Mega Buster arm cannon on a Skree.

Sure it's a little early to get started, but this year's holiday season is utterly mindblowing in its video game line up. I live in an expensive city, where you're practically forced to valet park during a trip to McDonald's. My night job as a janitor on David Hasselhoff's beach resort does not pay as much as one would expect. This often leaves me turning to friends and family as the main suppliers for my favorite addiction: collecting and playing video games. Each holiday season and birthday is a huge jackpot for me. I'm very blessed to have such generous people in my life. If any of them are reading this, I've saved you all the hassle of doing any research. Please preorder the following titles for me immediately. Yes, all of them. In return for your kindness, I will continue being the perfect son, friend, coworker, husband, grandson, kissing cousin, or midnight gay-lover-on-the-D.L. that you all adore.


NiGHTS: Journey of Dreams
Blast Works Build Destroy Wii
Lego Star Wars: The Complete Saga
Dewy's Adventure
Geometry Wars: Galaxies
Beautiful Katamari
Metroid Prime 3: Corruption
Super Smash Bros. Brawl
Zack & Wiki Quest for Barbaros' Treasure
Super Mario Galaxy
No More Heroes
Blue Dragon
Bio Shock
Mass Effect
Assassin's Creed

Divide and conquer, guys. I'm sure if you split this up among yourselves, each of you will be able to find an affordable chunk of games to purchase me. Remember that cute way I smile when you buy me something?

What about the rest of you? Anyone have a list less Wii-centric than mine? Are you buying all of these on release date or are you hitting up Mom and Pop?