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7:14 PM on 01.04.2011

2010 Sucked: The disappointment that came with No More Heroes 2

No More Heroes 2: Desperate Struggle was released in January last year. I was a huge fan of the first game, and I'd been waiting with bated breath for months for its sequel's release. Needless to say, I bought it on day one, and it was everything I'd hoped for. The gameplay was ridiculously fun, the humor was as present as ever, the music was fantastic, and the story was nothing short of amazing. A great taste was left in my mouth for months after I beat it, and that's how I knew it was one of my favorite games ever.

But why was the game such a disappointment?



Just a few months later, I went to my local Gamestop and saw a copy of Desperate Struggle for a mere 20 dollars. The game sold less than 30,000 copies in its first week.

Fuck everyone.   read


11:06 PM on 11.22.2010

HAPPY BIRTHDAY KARUTOMARU

Here is a viewtiful joe pic for your birthday:


Karutomaru is an old community member, an unofficial game reviewer and Viewtiful Joe's #1 fan. He tells me he is having trouble with Dtoid support. Apparently he can't get his blog back. He tells me perhaps you should give it back to him as a birthday present. How about it?   read


5:35 PM on 06.05.2010

Sakura's theme fits none

So it's been proven many times that Guile's theme fits everything, no matter what it is. Sakura's theme, however, fits nothing. Here are some videos I made that would have been better with Guile's theme in them.
[embed]175572:30368[/embed]
[embed]175572:30366[/embed]
[embed]175572:30369[/embed]
I posted this because I haven't posted anything in a while.   read


4:21 PM on 05.06.2010

Atlus shows us what's new in Persona 3 Portable / P3P's awesome preorder bonus

Atlus just uploaded a new video about what's new in Persona 3 Portable. It's pretty kick-ass. I'm a huge fan of Persona 3 and judging from this video, they've fixed pretty much all its flaws and added some cool new stuff in too.

[embed]173074:29667[/embed]

In case you don't want to or can't watch the video, here's a summary of the new features.

*You can now play as a female protagonist.

*Playing as a female protagonist changes the story and opens up new social links. The soundtrack will also be changed, including the battle song. The new one's still pretty cool though. The main story is essentially unchanged.

*2 new difficulty modes, Beginner and Maniac, have been added. Beginner gives you 30 chances to revive yourself when you die and makes battles easier, and Maniac makes the battles significantly harder, and makes it so that nothing carries over from your previous playthrough in a New Game+.

*New hazards have been added to Tartarus.

*There are more costumes and weapons.

*You can now have complete control over your allies.

*You can now access a place within Tartarus resembling the Desert of Doors and Monad, called the Hall of Doors, which gives you the chance to fight challenging battles and redo old boss fights with added challenge.

*You can now choose a new assistant for Igor in the velvet room named Theo, who can replace Elizabeth. You can only do this if you play as the female protagonist.

What do you guys think about the new additions? I personally love them, even though it seems like they kind of neglected the male protagonist. Why is it that the female can choose between Elizabeth and Theo and the male protagonist can only have Elizabeth? Oh well, no one's going to choose Theo anyway.

If you're planning on getting Persona 3 Portable, you should hurry and preorder it for the awesome bonus item you get as a preorder bonus.

  read


11:39 PM on 05.05.2010

My gaming webcomick "DOUBLE CLICK" Episode 1

hey guyse, I was reading Ctrl Alt Delete which is the best comic in the world. I decided to aspired to become like Tim Buckley and created my own gaming webcomic, here are the first 3 episods enjoy!!!!
U might have to right click view image because it cuts it off!
BUY MY TSHIRTS AND MERCHANDISE ALSO 2 PLZZZZZZZZZZ
ths ones caled cocks, its a refernse to an old film i liked

this one is caled dongs like the bell of life the rings and gives life 2 everoyne

this one is one of my proudest wroks yet, i think i done a good job of making it darmatic and not always humaras. ppl think that this comac is only baout gamers, but gamers have problems too like girlfirends.

i apologize for the watermarks, but ppl migth want to steal these there really good
hope u enjoyed i encourage everynoe to make there own gaming comic but not too many cuz ull take my bandwich.   read


11:10 PM on 05.03.2010

DEsTRuCTOID: A YoutUBE SEArCh stoRY

I accept your challenge.
[embed]172771:29565[/embed]
You can make your own if you'd like.
Why don't you try it out?   read


8:34 PM on 04.20.2010

E for Effort: Thank You, Come Again



Imagine youíre in high school, and youíre taking a course you really love. Your teacher is a really cool person who you admire. Youíre earning an A in the class, and have been working really hard for that A. One day, the teacher decides to give you a multiple choice pop quiz consisting of 6 questions about his wifeís measurements. Itís worth 8,000,000,000,000 points, and if you miss one question you get an F.



Persona 3 and Persona 4 are my favorite games in the world and I love them to death. But that doesn't mean they aren't full of poor design choices and flaws. It's really hard to say which I like more, as they are both fantastic games, and they each have flaws that the other game doesn't.

I wrote a blog 2 days ago describing features of Persona 3 I hated, that were all fixed in its sequel, Persona 4. But that blog wasn't in any way a declaration that I preferred Persona 4. The fixes of the flaws made room for new ones. And the worst one was its bad ending. The bad ending in Persona 4 is a perfect example of how not to make a bad ending.

Alternate endings are meant to give a sense of non-linearity, but this goal is usually not achieved. In Bioshock, if you get the "evil" or bad ending, you're portrayed as some sadistic asshole who makes Stalin look like Mother Teresa. And getting this ending doesn't even require being evil. It requires you to harvest ONE single Little Sister. Most people will probably do this out of curiosity at least one time if they go into the game knowing nothing about it.



Persona 3 did have one normal and one "bad" ending. However, the bad ending of Persona 3 was one of the best examples of a bad ending ever. Contrary to a game like Bioshock, Persona 3's ending is determined by a single, straightforward choice. You are presented with a decision that clearly decides your fate, and you can easily tell what consequences each of your two possible choices will lead to. This is good. The bad ending you get in Persona 3 isn't just a giant f**k you for giving into curiosity like it is in Bioshock.

Notice how I put quotation marks around the word "bad". Another reason Persona 3's "bad" ending was a great example of how to make one was because it wasn't THAT bad. It was depressing enough to make it clear that it was meant to be a bad ending. But it certainly wasn't a f**k you. It left you with a sense of emptiness, but didn't leave you feeling cheated. Depending on how you look at it, it could even be considered happier than the normal ending. A reasonable discrepancy between alternate endings is good if you're going to have them. In Bioshock, you're either Jesus or Satan. In Persona 4, the difference is just as bad.

In Persona 4, there are 3 endings. Thereís a bad ending (with no quotes), a normal ending, and a true ending. Firstly, let me explain why the bad ending is the worst ending Iíve ever seen. Even worse than Shark Attack 3ís. It offers absolutely no closure. I donít want to spoil anything, but imagine a detective novel in which the main character tries to figure out who the murderer is once and for all. He thinks of 3 people who couldnít be the murderer. He then gives up and quits.

I just spoiled it, didnít I? Damnit.

But the ending itself, even though itís terrible, can be SOMEWHAT forgiven because itís supposed to be a giant f**k you. The implementation of the ending and how to get to it canít. Iím going to have to put this in the most juvenile way possible to get my point across.

The way you get the bad ending in Persona 4 is f**king stupid. F**k it. It is literally a taint on gaming, not just in the sense of ďa stain on gamingĒ but literally a taint, the anatomical area between the anus and the testicles.

Look back at the beginning of this blog. How does that relate to anything? Well, that is how Persona 4 gives you your choice of which ending youíll get. Or wait, no it isnít. Imagine that you passed the quiz, and are really happy about doing it, whether you cheated or not. Then the next week, another quiz is given out, this time worth 16,000,000,000,000,000 points, and it consists of one question where you have to write down 3 guesses as to what your teacherís favorite food is.

You can save before the long series of game-deciding questions in Persona 4, but it kind of breaks immersion when you have to re-load your save file after getting the bad ending to re-watch an hour of scenes that were actually really heartfelt the first time.

Yes, thatís how Persona 4 gives you your choice of which ending youíll get, rather than Persona 3ís straightforward yes or no question. If you do manage to get past the 2 quizzes without using GameFAQs, give yourself a pat on the back. If you did cheat, no oneís blaming you. Congratulations, now you get a B because you didnít stay in class wiping the chalkboard for 2 hours after the last bell on the last day of school rang even though your teacher told you to ďget out of the class what are you doing hereĒ.

Thatís right, they pull the true ending bullshit on you. Literally, the game tells you to ďgo homeĒ. You canít get the true ending unless you are a MOTHERF**KING rebel and disobey the gameís commands. How awesome!

I donít see why the developers decided they needed to put the true ending into the game.
[VERY MINOR SPOILER ALERT]
Youíd think that after you solved the gameís mystery and beat some giant thing that was pretty much god in an epic boss fight with epic music, that youíd beaten the game. Nope! That wasnít God, it was Godís puppet! Now you have to really fight God so you can witness a scene with some terrible voice acting that was the equivalent to patching a bunch of (plot)holes on the hull of a ship with rice paper. Shut up, you shouldnít care that I spoiled something that stupid, unless youíre just disappointed because you expected something better from an otherwise blissful gaming experience.
[/VERY MINOR SPOILER ALERT]



The reason this is less forgivable than Bioshockís bad ending is because Bioshock isnít 80 hours long. I shouldnít have to explain this.

Alternate endings have to not have a f**k you as a bad ending to be effective. Saying f**k you to the player is not good storytelling. They should be implemented in such a way that makes them near impossible to get without a guide or without knowing how to get them in the first place. Thatís it for this blog. In closing, make sure to use a guide when you get to November in Persona 4. Seriously.   read


1:41 AM on 04.18.2010

Persona's lame joke.

Alright. lets get this over with. i hate the PERSONA games. they just came out with PERSONA game number 6 or three 3 if you cant count. and i here there is supposed to be persona 5 after! holy crap! doesn't PERSONa die when its 4 years? thats the joke....

its called PERSONa. wheres the PERSON? ya know...that part everyone dies from canser when their 4?! where the organs start to FAIL ...then the angle comes down and u start to not breath but its peaseful.

but it looks like that is never going to happen.

there is no person in PERSONa. nice joke guys...nobodys laughing.

PERSONa should be JESUSa. see what i did there?! did you see it? Everyone dies of cancers when their young but jesus lives forver..

and please dont flame. i know this is a short post....but dont troll. trolling is bad for you tumor. and testicals.
remember....this was just about the persona joke. this is also about my life. thats why its short. yes...i really do hate cancer. But its okay my mom told me everyone does it =

I have one more 4th birthday cake to pwn befor I dieÖ   read


8:44 PM on 04.17.2010

E for Effort: The Answer


Itís always nice to be challenged by video games. Persona 3 is a JRPG developed by Atlus, and itís the wonderful game that made me fall in love with RPGs in general. Persona 3ís main storyline is certainly very difficult, even on normal or beginner mode. While this is partially because of good design and challenging turn-based combat that required actual skill/thinking, it was also because of glaring design flaws and extremely frustrating gameplay mechanics. Challenge should only come from good game design, and a game being purposefully excruciating shouldnít be an excuse for bad design, and Persona 3 is a very hard game, but is hard mostly for the wrong reasons.



Donít get me wrong, I loved Persona 3, so much that Iíd call it my favorite or second favorite game of all time. However, some aspects of it made me want to shoot myself in the head with a real gun. A perfect example is the ďCharmĒ status effect. If you havenít played Persona 3, Charm is a status effect that makes you heal your enemies and attack your allies. This is damn stupid. Why? Because itís completely based around luck. I once faced a boss with around 800 HP and very high defense. When my partners were charmed by this boss, I could just heal them from it before they healed the boss. But then I was charmed. This battle embodied everything I hate about Persona 3. My idiot allies decided to heal me instead of attack the boss or un-charm me. I then proceeded to heal the boss for 360 health. Eventually I died, and quit playing for a while.

This brings me to the next thing I hate about Persona 3. The fact that you canít control your allies is the worst part of Persona 3. 90% of your deaths will be due to this. Not only do they decide to restore your health instead of healing your charm which they are perfectly capable of doing, but they suck at fighting too. You have some degree of control over your allies in the form of ďtacticsĒ. You can instruct your allies to do things like ďHeal/SupportĒ or ďFull AssaultĒ. However, they still act like idiots. When set to Heal/Support, once Yukari, one of your party members who is primarily a healer, gets a spell called Wind Break which nullifies wind resistance, she will prioritize using this over healing near dying allies. On Full Assault, characters will usually ignore the weaknesses that youíve exploited and that they can exploit too, and hit enemies with the wrong attacks that will drag the battle on pointlessly. But sometimes your alliesí artificial intelligence screws you over in a way that is unrelated to the tactics you choose. In the final boss battle, which takes about an hour, your party members will kill themselves, a lot, in the last 10 minutes of it. This will most likely make you have to redo the whole thing unless youíre level 99 or something. This issue is completely related to the crappy AI. When the boss puts up a reflector shield, and your support character tells everyone to hold their attacks, they ignore her, and proceed to kill themselves. And there are plenty more AI issues that youíd know about if you played the game, but I donít want to rant about that anymore.



I don't understand why these issues weren't fixed in the re-release of the game (Persona 3 FES) which included lots of minor enhancements. Were they too lazy to fix the big problems?

While these issues can be forgiven in Persona 3ís main storyline because Persona 3ís main storyline is just so goddamn awesome in so many ways, these issues are exacerbated in Persona 3 FESís new chapter Ė The Answer, or Episode Aegis if youíre Japanese. In this new section of the game you play as Aigis, a party member in the last game. Since youíre now playing as a robot, most of the gameís elements have been removed. This includes the ability to switch weapon types and costumes for a more personalized dungeon crawling experience, but the worst change was the removal of day to day school life and ďsocial linksĒ.



This isnít all of whatís bad about the Answer though. Although I forgive the returning bad design flaws from the main story less for the removal of social links, this isnít why I didnít like The Answer that much. Even though the AI sucks and there are stupid status effects that sometimes ruin the game like Charm, the combat is still very fun, and The Answer is based entirely around combat. This would be fine, if every single second of the game wasnít so goddamn difficult.

No, stop commenting and telling me that Iím a pussy and that you beat The Answer with only your Surt with 99 Magic. I donít care. The Answer is too hard. Not Demonís Souls hard, not Donkey Kong hard, just damn stupid hard. And this isnít just because of good design. Giving bosses too much health and giving a lot of them charming spells is not good design. Battles donít require any more strategy than they did in the main story; they just require more healing items. Every single boss in this game will kill you multiple times unless you grind for a ridiculous amount of time. And by a ridiculous amount of time I mean an EXTREMELY large amount of hours. If you didnít grind your ass off in the first dungeon, expect even weak monsters to take out half your party every battle.

The amount of health and charming spells the bosses have isnít the only reason why theyíre so hard, though. Itís because you donít get to heal up before you fight them. This is so goddamn stupid. I cannot stress this enough. Normal enemies in this game WILL require SP (Spirit Points, i.e. what you need to cast spells) consuming spells to beat, and by the time you reach a boss youíll normally be almost out of SP. And no, you donít get SP restoring items, unless you want to spend about 2 minutes waiting for a soda to come out of a vending machine that can restore 5 SP points (which is nothing). So what you have to do is either fight the boss with little SP for spells, which you need, or return home and go through the entire dungeon again while trying to dodge enemies to avoid wasting SP, which is really hard to do as they move just as fast as you do. I thought it was really cool that Persona 3ís main story let you heal before bosses and I expected a return of this feature going into The Answer.



Another thing thatís stupid is the lack of a Persona storage system. Seriously Atlus, why the hell would you remove something so convenient?

The Answer is unnecessarily hard, but battles are still pretty fun. It's by no means bad. I wouldnít say itís not worth playing through if you werenít satisfied with Persona 3ís main storyís ending. But although The Answerís ending is straightforward and concludes the story well, itís stupid. Seriously, beating this game probably wonít feel as rewarding as beating the main story at all, even though its ending was confusing and left a lot of questions. I donít want to spoil anything, but the ending of The Answer looks like it was copy pasted from a generic anime. After the ending youíll be treated to a credits song that is good, but not nearly half as good as the main storyís. Beating The Answer just isnít rewarding, and it should be considering its difficulty.

These issues are all fixed in Persona 4, which is a fantastic game, and a better game than Persona 3, but it's still not Persona 3, which has a completely different style and charm to it.



But wait! Persona 3 Portable is coming out, and it fixes everything! Oh yes Atlus, thank you for making a 3rd version of Persona 3. It's like Persona 3 3! This is totally better than Persona 5 will be because you can play as a girl! And she's super hot, man! And guess what, it fits in your pocket! This is going to be the best and most necessary game ever.
I'm not being sarcastic ;_;   read


11:28 PM on 04.07.2010

Do You Think This Is Real? - Dude, This One Lives In Caves

Dear Podtoid Members/Listeners,
[embed]170324:28910[/embed]
You're welcome.
Much love,
Tray Ben   read


6:51 PM on 03.30.2010

[NVGR] The Greatest Idea for an Invention Ever

I have just thought of the greatest idea for an invention ever. I'm serious. This will blow your mind.

"Hold it Tray Ben", you say, "how will your invention top the car? Or the airplane? Or the NES? Or the lightbulb? Or the wheel? It can't be that good". But I can guarantee you, this will blow your mind. Follow me as I walk you through what my thought process was when thinking of this amazing idea.

First, imagine a Slurpee or Icee machine. Whatever you prefer. But with no logos.
it took me 20 minutes to draw this


Next, fill the machine with, hot and ready to eat, RAMEN.
this is probably my favorite image out of the four


YES! IMAGINE YOURSELF PULLING DOWN ON THE HANDLE AND HOLDING YOUR CUP UNDER THE NOZZLE AND FILLING IT UP WITH DELICIOUS RAMEN.
oh god this image is terrible


Now let's paint it again, with style.
I got lazy okay


This is not one of those ramen machines that already exists. No no no, this is very different. This isn't just a vending machine; the ramen will come straight out of the nozzle ready to eat like how air comes out of the hand dryers in those diagrams. You know what I'm talking about, right?


Someone who knows how to use a wrench needs to go invent this right now. No need to credit me, just send me a check for a billion dollars in a year or two. It's only about 10% of what you'll have made by then.

drawing those seriously took me 45 minutes   read


11:50 PM on 03.26.2010

First Impressions: Killer 7 + Contest Results!

Here is a short paragraph I wrote in 5 minutes about my thoughts on Killer 7 for the sake of this post having some content.

Going into Killer 7 having previously played both games in the No More Heroes series and knowing it was made by Suda 51, I expected a game even crazier than No More Heroes. And that's what I got.The game starts off with a boring opening sequence of a black guy who does some stuff. Then a red man who looks like he was pulled from a Katamari game talks to you about being in a tight spot a couple hundred times. Not much is explained in the beginning of the game, including the plot, which is pretty weird and annoying. Most of it is left for the player to find out. This, in my opinion, sucks. The game is pretty damn complicated as far as games go. The 'blood' mechanic confused me for most of the 2 hours I spent playing the game today. The sounds that sometimes play mean things, which aren't explained. All the tutorial teaches you is how to move and shoot and stuff. This brings me to the combat, which is pretty damn fun. It's a lot like a rail shooter, except a lot cooler. It works well with console controls and is challenging enough, but not too much. You can play as 7 different personas all which have their own unique weapons and powers to use. The art and animation are unique and outstanding. However, I couldn't say the same about the music, which seems thrown together and is not nearly as good as No More Heroes'.

Overall, I've enjoyed Killer 7 so far. Despite its super steep learning curve, I'm going to commit myself to sticking to this game. Expect a full, well thought out and written, review of Killer 7 within the next few weeks. And Chibi-Robo if I'm in the mood for writing.

CONTEST RESULTS!

I received a lot of, uh, good entries! Since I couldn't decide on a favorite I decided to pick 11 and pick the winner by rolling dice. If the comments don't make sense, it's cause you gotta view the image, dummy! Here are the contenders!


The closest thing to what I would have said which makes it good, right?

I wish I could have tea with a girl.

Definitely.

Inorite?

I preferred Shadow Yosuke actually.

The most unexpected entry which happens to be one of my favorites.

Or maybe this was the closest thing to what I have said. Either way I totally agree.

I'd hit it...

There are two enemies!

I'm sorry, you deserve an apology.

Don't forget Ice Break. I have 10 HP, Heal/support doesn't mean spam Ice Break.

And the winner is...

Phantomile!


I rolled 2 six-sided die, I swear! It has nothing to do with the comment, mind you. Contact me for the prize. Thanks for entering, everybody! I'll try to do one of these little contests every once in a while.   read


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