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I am a girl gamer, and totally not a dude.
Totally Not A Dude | 2:05 PM on 02.23.2008 81 comments




Hello Destructoid. As you can see by my username, I am a girl, and totally not a dude. I have a vagina and breasts, and my body is quite shapely. I have been told that I am favorable to look upon. Sometimes I send pictures to boys who comment on my bloggings and forum posts, because that is what girls do on the internet. I am totally not a dude.

I play video games. They are entertaining and a lovely way to spend my time. I have consoles and handhelds, and games for my consoles and handhelds. I purchased them. I have a funny story about a video game store employee and his reaction to a girl purchasing video games. This story is so amusing. You laugh at funny stories. I laugh at funny stories. We have this in common. This implies that I will engage in sexual relations with you, as I am of course a girl on the internet, and totally not a dude.

Animals are cute, except for those animals that are not. As a girl, I have delicate sensibilities with regard to the harming of the cuter varieties of animals. I like pink things. Girls like pink things and cute animals. This proves that I am totally not a dude. I am a girl. Ha ha ha.

I include intricate smiley faces after everything I say for no reason. >=)P

I have been informed there are males here who will react to my posting with what appear to be harmless comments, but are in actuality clumsy attempts to begin wooing me. Fortunately, both of us know there is no harm in our flirting, as we are all the way across the internet from one another. That is, of course, if one of us is not a serial rapist. Then one of us would locate the other via Google, come to the other's house and engage in violent sexual relations with them. Murder would probably follow soon after. I am a girl though, not a serial rapist. I am totally not a serial rapist.

Please post in my comments. I will send you pictures of my female form in provocative poses, but the angles of the shots will be strange and awkward in an effort to appear artistic and unique. Unfortunately, everyone else does the exact same thing, but I am a girl on the internet, and totally not a dude or a serial rapist, and I will do these things anyway.

Here is a picture of me:



This picture is a real picture of me, a girl.



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76 comments | showing # 1 to 50
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next 50 comments

007's Avatar - Comment posted on 02/23/2008 14:08
007


^This looks like a dude to me...
Neonie's Avatar - Comment posted on 02/23/2008 14:09
Neonie
I agree entirly with 007
thomasa's Avatar - Comment posted on 02/23/2008 14:09
thomasa
Definitely packing meat.
Arcanum's Avatar - Comment posted on 02/23/2008 14:10
Arcanum
trap?
Nah....
junkie's Avatar - Comment posted on 02/23/2008 14:10
junkie
This is a joke, right?
Mizruko's Avatar - Comment posted on 02/23/2008 14:12
Mizruko
OMG a girl this truly is big news...
power-glove's Avatar - Comment posted on 02/23/2008 14:13
power-glove
Seriously, the person who came up with this stupid joke needs to die.
Arcanum's Avatar - Comment posted on 02/23/2008 14:14
Arcanum
Come on guys, you have your work cut out for you. 100 comments in the next 20 minutes.
CaffeinePowered's Avatar - Comment posted on 02/23/2008 14:16
CaffeinePowered
Its a trap
demonelite's Avatar - Comment posted on 02/23/2008 14:16
demonelite
$10 says its Wiisucks.
DaedHead8's Avatar - Comment posted on 02/23/2008 14:19
DaedHead8
I cried at first, realized its a joke, loled a bit, now I'm meh. My guess is it's Sterling.
A Sexually Disturbed Jedi's Avatar - Comment posted on 02/23/2008 14:22
A Sexually Disturbed Jedi
DO A BARREL ROLL!
PANZERDRAKO's Avatar - Comment posted on 02/23/2008 14:23
PANZERDRAKO
well, cook me something!
Harknett's Avatar - Comment posted on 02/23/2008 14:26
Harknett
Sounds legit.
Kaos Angel's Avatar - Comment posted on 02/23/2008 14:27
Kaos Angel
I love the header!

And it's obviously this is a joke XD
Arcanum's Avatar - Comment posted on 02/23/2008 14:28
Arcanum
This is a JOKE?
You don't say....
A New Challenger's Avatar - Comment posted on 02/23/2008 14:31
A New Challenger
Will you marry me?
No shutdown's Avatar - Comment posted on 02/23/2008 14:32
No shutdown
I was wondering when ackbar would show up...
Totally Not A Dude's Avatar - Comment posted on 02/23/2008 14:32
Totally Not A Dude
I am a girl. I am totally not a trap.
B-Radicate's Avatar - Comment posted on 02/23/2008 14:33
B-Radicate
I vote electro lemon.
bbrigg1's Avatar - Comment posted on 02/23/2008 14:35
bbrigg1
picture is shopped.

Here's the real one:
NeoPrime's Avatar - Comment posted on 02/23/2008 14:36
NeoPrime


Internets is a lie. What's one more?

DO A BARREL ROLL!!!!
Silverback 55's Avatar - Comment posted on 02/23/2008 14:37
Silverback 55
In the great words of Eric Cartman...
"Get your bitch ass back in the kitchen. And make me some pie."

Oh and this is totally Wiisucks.
braulio09's Avatar - Comment posted on 02/23/2008 14:37
braulio09
i vote Yoj1mb0
bbrigg1's Avatar - Comment posted on 02/23/2008 14:38
bbrigg1
shit
Andrex's Avatar - Comment posted on 02/23/2008 14:38
Andrex
Write about video games and you will be fine,

Welcome and Don't suck
youkilledmyguy's Avatar - Comment posted on 02/23/2008 14:41
youkilledmyguy
Go die in a fire.
Sharpless's Avatar - Comment posted on 02/23/2008 14:43
Sharpless
I FULLY BELIEVE YOU.

Stop it, Lemon.
sleepingagain's Avatar - Comment posted on 02/23/2008 14:44
sleepingagain
lol cross dressing trolls..
casualweaponry's Avatar - Comment posted on 02/23/2008 14:46
casualweaponry
Screw this, I'm calling for help...

CannibalCalvin 's Avatar - Comment posted on 02/23/2008 14:49
CannibalCalvin
TITS OR GET THE FUCK OUT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Aertyr's Avatar - Comment posted on 02/23/2008 14:49
Aertyr
OMG U IS A GAMER? U SHULD SHEWS ME UR BOOBZ LAWL ASL? SEX LAETERZ?
Maurice Tan's Avatar - Comment posted on 02/23/2008 14:51
Maurice Tan
Still in before Whiteboy and 13th Dragon!
Knivy's Avatar - Comment posted on 02/23/2008 14:52
Knivy
"I include intricate smiley faces after everything I say for no reason. >=)P "

Hey!! I do that all the time =(.
Aertyr's Avatar - Comment posted on 02/23/2008 14:54
Aertyr
WILL U FRIEND ME! I NEED FRIENDZ! PLZ?! OMGZ BFF FEREVAR
weirdfunk's Avatar - Comment posted on 02/23/2008 14:54
weirdfunk
SHAMELESS!!
VWGTI's Avatar - Comment posted on 02/23/2008 14:55
VWGTI
Hide this garbage. You fail at being funny.
crackity jones's Avatar - Comment posted on 02/23/2008 14:56
crackity jones
I have a feeling this will end up being copypasta everywhere now, also dumb troll is dumb


hmm but I guess I'm feeding it .... oh well
bitterbohemian's Avatar - Comment posted on 02/23/2008 14:57
bitterbohemian
sure...oh, BTW, I'm Uwe Boll.
insomnia's Avatar - Comment posted on 02/23/2008 14:58
insomnia
You owe me a new keyboard.

P.S. The C-Blogs are very fickle.
Jonathan Holmes's Avatar - Comment posted on 02/23/2008 14:59
Jonathan Holmes
Pics please.
Aertyr's Avatar - Comment posted on 02/23/2008 15:13
Aertyr
SHOW UZ UR TITAYS
Cowzilla3's Avatar - Comment posted on 02/23/2008 15:16
Cowzilla3
It's a trick. Get an ax.
Segasonicdude's Avatar - Comment posted on 02/23/2008 15:18
Segasonicdude
this is very puzzling.....and very funny

Never Heard a Girl Talk like that before ....except those pesky Myspace Spam Bots that want you to join some Psudo-dating site
BS3 Owner's Avatar - Comment posted on 02/23/2008 15:35
BS3 Owner
@ DTOID

Notice : There is NO story here...

@ youkilledmyguy

My thoughts exactly!
Samit Sarkar's Avatar - Comment posted on 02/23/2008 15:36
Samit Sarkar
I hope this is some sort of satirical joke. Because if it isn’t, then GTFO my internets. For cereal.
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