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7 Stupid Things You'll Hear from E3 this year (short blog) - Destructoid

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Hi, I'm Toadofsky. If you're reading this blog, you've either...

A. Hit a typo, and found my blog
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Well, I came up with the name from Mario RPG, that composer at Tadpole pond.
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I also enjoy doing lots of photo shop work. Most of it is
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I suck at blogging, I haven't made a post in like 4 months, maybe more, oh well. But this was a topic I definitely wanted to talk about. You see, over the years, I've seen the same exact pattern follow from every year of E3, and well, here's a few things...


1. WHO WON E3?!
Yes, the ultimate question raised every year. No, no company can be different from one another, no sir. They can't offer different things from their competition in order to stand out, no sir. Every ridiculous game journalist has to lump every company together because he/she isn't satisfied unless some fanboys get upset over what they think, or to feel superior over another console manufacturer.

2. Ugh sales charts, yawn...
Companies SHOULD show their year over year progress. Sometimes they outdo others by a wide margin, sometimes not so much. But the business side is always nice to hear. Of course, to lazy obnoxious journalists that only want to be wowed by fancy trailers, celebrities, the physics engines that show how unrealistic games will still be for a long time to come (really, should you think any different?), and booth babes, the business side is “boring”. But have they ever considered that they're not the only ones that attend E3? Maybe potential investors watch the show? Or REAL journalists, you know, newspaper/news channel journalists, are there wanting to see some facts? Food for thought people...

3. NINTENDO IS DOOMED......................AGAIN
Doesn't matter what Nintendo does at any point in time. They can be first in sales overall each year (they have been overall), and have the best holiday season they've had since the launch of their console, THEY'RE DOOMED. Even when people start trying to pit them “against” Apple, since they don't want to pit them with the other consoles, THEY'RE DOOMED. They show 3DS!! THEY'RE DOOMED!!! DOOMED DOOMED DOOOOOOOOOOOOMED!!! (Doesn't this get old?)

4. NO HARDCORE GAMES FROM NINTENDO
You just got Mario Galaxy 2, you have Metroid Other M coming out (yawn), Sin and Punishment 2, you probably have Super Smash Bros. Brawl, there are a ton of great games NOT MADE BY NINTENDO THAT ARE GOOD GAMES ON THE WII. I'll quote Dr. Phil, “IT'S NOT ABOUT YOU!!!! GET REAL!! GET OVER IT!!” I could do a whole blog about how ridiculous and out of touch the hardcore are with reality, let alone how stupid and unreasonable they are. Sure, they'll talk about how great all the M-Rated games are, and how games are some sort of “art”, but they never seem to think about games expanding, and catering to other people, and that games should only expand if it's in their tastes. To think otherwise, is stupid and selfish. Companies don't grow and expand if they stay in the same place, same thing goes for gaming in general. And to be honest, far too many franchises either need to be left alone for a while, or just left alone. Case in point, Zelda. Ocarina of Time has aged HORRIBLY, and we keep seeing a “revision” of that formula on the console versions. People are sick of that, I am, and gamers, or maybe as one blogger called them, returning gamers, are. I forget though, hardcore are the ones who believe they're the only ones that matter.


5. PACHTER: “Well I think.....(Hint: something stupid)”
I don't care how many Pachter apologists there are out there (why are there any in the first place?!), Pachter has proven time and again to be consistently wrong. And not about just Nintendo. “Borderlands was sent out to die!”, “Red Dead Redemption will fail!”, “ Project Ten Dollar is great! They should charge more!”, “Blue Ocean Strategy doesn't work”, “Vitality Sensor is Stupid!” (who knows what that will be for, really), “Wii HD exists! I TOLD NINTENDO TO MAKE IT!”, I may not be a market analyst, but if I had been consistently wrong on so many things, I would have kept my mouth shut after wards. But for some reason, since few journalists seem to do any fact checking, want to use this guy, and make him out to be some sort of “go to” celebrity. Considering he's probably getting kick backs to run his mouth, I won't be surprised that he will eventually say something stupid again, and again and again. The market consistently proves him wrong. I honestly pity Wedbush Morgan for putting up with this sort of behavior (if they're not getting kick backs from it in the first place).

6. (Insert game name here) WILL BE GAME OF THE YEAR!! EPIC!!! FTW!!!!
If you haven't already figured it out, I don't like much about E3 except seeing some of the upcoming games, all the other wasted fluff, cirque de sole this year, celebrities, and much more means nothing to me, show me some games that look entertaining, not a bunch of stupid 5 hour movies I've seen this past generation. Of course the fanboys will be circling the forums and web pages offering their two cents on what game will be the best game ever, since they know only from 2 minutes of a trailer, and haven't played it at all.

7.BEST E3 EVER!!!
Yes, each year is the best ever. No, every year gets topped, doesn't matter. No single year is ever going to be pinpointed. It's just a buzz word thrown around from all the hype getting thrown at all the people attending/watching E3. Can't we just have some sort of stand out year? 2006 was a good year, at least to me it was...

Sorry for this essentially being a rant, but this is basically the same pattern I see every year from this event...



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