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8:43 PM on 03.30.2008

Satriani signs on for Guitar Hero, Rock Band

Pioneering guitarist Joe Satriani has stated in an interview with Guitar World that he has licensed his hits "Satch Boogie" and "Surfing with the Alien" for the next installments of Guitar Hero and Rock Band.

My question is: how will Harmonix implement these songs into Rock Band if they have no vocals? Perhaps they will overdub a cowbell solo.   read

12:19 PM on 11.17.2007

More Rock Band videos, this guy gets ANOTHER game early

pdtecrj, the guy that got Guitar Hero 3 well before it's release date and posted videos of each song, got his grubby little hands on Rock Band.

He'll be uploading almost every song.   read

8:54 PM on 11.16.2007

Live Rock Band Stream, all songs inside.

Seems like this guy's got the full retail version of Rock Band, and has been playing it for a while now.


Green Grass and High Tides is the final song.

Link of win: mms://   read

8:08 PM on 10.22.2007

Game Review Website Battle of the bands, Epic fail inside

A couple of weeks ago, Harmonix approached ScoreHero to help organize a press event for their upcoming title, Rock Band. ScoreHero gladly accepted the offer, and Phr34k took on the challenge of creating the tournament format for the event. The end result was a fantastic tournament format that showcases the various game modes that will be in Rock Band. This event will take place over the next couple of weeks, leading up to Rock Band's release in late November of this year. The participants in this event will be none other than 10 complete bands (4 members each), derived from the top 10 video game review sites:

• GameSpot
• GameSpy
• Team Xbox
• GamePro Online
• 1up
• GamesRadar
• GameTrailers
• Yahoo

ScoreHero will be providing per round updates on the event and how the 'bands' are progressing, and each website has the opportunity to release articles based on their experience with the game and tournament. The event will start early next week with Round 1, and will continue towards the finals in mid-November. Which band will emerge victorious? Stay tuned to find out!

And where does Destructoid fit into all of this? NOWHERE. Nero could've put those asshats in their place.

*sigh*   read

5:49 PM on 10.17.2007

Guitar Hero III's rendition of the Devil went down to georgia... LEAKED!

And it's amazing. SPoilers....

No wonder it's the final encore!   read

5:06 PM on 10.16.2007

Slave to the Sock: Masturbation and its Popularization in North American Culture

I'm travelin' down the road an’ I'm flirtin' with disaster
I've got the pedal to the floor an’ my life is running faster
I'm outta money outta hope it looks like self destruction
Well how much more can we take with all of this corruption

We’re flirtin' with disaster, ya'll know what I mean
And the way we run our lives it makes no sense to me
I don’t know about yourself or what you wanna to be, yeah
When we gamble with our time we choose our destiny

I'm travelin' down that lonesome road.
Feel like I'm draggin’ a heavy load.
Yet I've tried to turn my head away,
Feel about the same most every day
You know what I’m talkin’ about man

Speeding down the fast lane an’ honey we’re playin' from town to town
The boys and I been burnin' it up can't seem to slow it down
I got the pedal to the floor our lives are runnin' faster,
We got our sight set straight ahead but I ain't sure what we're after

We’re flirtin' with disaster ya'll damn sure know what I mean.
You know the way we run our lives it makes no sense to me
I don't know about yourself or what you plan to be, yeah
When we gamble with our time we choose our destiny

Yeah!! We're travelin' down that lonesome road.
Feel like I'm dragging a heavy load.
Though I try to turn my head away,
I'm flirtin' with disaster every day.
An’ you are too baby, Ha ha ha ha ha
You aim for everyone, Oh come on baby

Guitar solo

We’re flirtin' with disaster baby ya'll know what I mean
You know the way we run our lives it makes no sense to me
I don't know about yourself or what you plan to be
When we gamble with our time we choose our destiny

Yeah!! We're travelin' down this lonesome road.
Feel like I'm dragging a heavy load.
Though I try to turn my head away, Bop mm bop bop yeah
We’re flirtin' with disaster every day.   read

6:49 PM on 10.10.2007

Coheed And Cambia's "Welcome Home" to be in ROCK BAND!

h-h-h-h-h-h-h-h-h-h-o-o-o-l-l-l-y sh-sh-sh-shit!

s-s-s-stutter!   read

2:51 PM on 10.05.2007

Led Zeppelin Will not be in GH 3: Confirmed.

Hate to be the bearer of bad news.

That sucks.

But at least there's still PC customs that I can look forward to.   read

9:25 AM on 09.30.2007

Girl Gamers: I am getting sick of this topic.

It seems almost every time Hamsa CTZ posts a "Destructoid Network: This week's finest," there is always an entry about girl gamers somewhere. Why do you people care, besides the bewbs? Is it the drama that attracts you? Is it because they are a rare breed?

The topic of girl gamers is the dead horse that is being beaten by the metaphorical stick. Yes. Girl gamers are being pounded by the stick. Girls.... uh... pounded by... *drool*....stick.... um....   read

7:32 PM on 09.29.2007

An ugly chick

You're welcome.   read

2:52 PM on 09.24.2007

Some New Guitar Hero 3 Videos

Sorry if these have been posted before:

Bulls on Parade, with Tom Morello playing with you (his model looks creepy)

Cult of Personality


I think the singer's amazingly lifelike mo-cap makes up for his freakish chin. The drummer's robotic movements seem to have been fixed as well.   read

8:47 PM on 09.23.2007

My Comprehensive Review of the Transformers Movie

Yeah, I'm a little late on this one. I've been bitching about this movie since 2004 and I don't think I'll stop any time soon. I'm gonna try and get this over quick.

In 2006 some concept art was leaked. Whoever drew those concepts needs to be beaten profusely above the vulva because they looked like the result of the Predator having sex with a grinder. Bumblebee looked like a zombie baby from a Tim Burton movie gone wrong, and Incinerator looked like the Alien with six sharp blades jutting from his jagged robotic posterior.

The fans were not pleased.

Then a couple months later the script was leaked. Roberto Orci said it was a false script but all in all it was the same one with a few name changes.

On July 3rd, I watched Transformers. I was completely and utterly shocked by the mediocrity that was splashed upon my eyes.

The basic plot of the film is some 16 year old trying to get laid with the hottest girl in his school while his yellow robot from outer space assists. Meanwhile, a helicopter pops out of nowhere and blasts the fuck out of some military base in the middle-east. Once it's done blasting several buildings to oblivion, it shits out some scorpion thing made of barbed wire that is afflicted with ADD for no reason at all except for a money shot to use in every single trailer and TV spot.

Meanwhile, on Air Force one a boombox transforms into another shiny robot thing made of barbed wire that is high on vicodin, trying to hack into some high-tech computer with access to high-profile government file which is for some reason unprotected and unguarded. It proceedes to stick some metal extendature into a hole and skullfucks the computer until it gets the files.

The lonely teenage nerd meets the other robots from outerspace, consisting of the typical one-dimensional heroic, patriotic, red white and blue character that believes in freedom, a gun-toting Clint Eastwood wannabe, a mute naive yellow robot who can only speak through his radio, the typical medic with three lines, and the black robot who speaks ghetto and gets ripped in half. Yeah, this movie is original.

It all culminates into a battle over some shitty plot device cube thing that can grant life but can't destroy this movie so nobody else has to see it. The following 40 minutes is your typical Michael Bay explosion fest. Of course, there's a happy ending, which surprisingly (or not) consists of the nerd and his hot slut fucking on top of the yellow robot that saved his life.

Basically, this movie defines mediocrity. The robots are completely one dimensional. The first half consists of only humans and Bernie Mac thinking he's funny and the other half is robots goring eachother to death in a movie made for eight year olds. There is absolutely no time in between to give the robots personalities except for the ones pasted on the back of their toy boxes.

All in all, the only saving grace of this film is Shia Labeouf's comical wit, adding the only personality to this plethora of wooden characters. And the CGI is pretty. And a masturbation joke.   read

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