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11:11 PM on 10.01.2015

The ESRB just called out the United Nations over video games.

(Header Image source )

Ok that may be a little bit of an exaggeration more correctly a group backed by the ESRB called The Video Game Voters Network just put this out on twitter.

So what's all this insanity about?

Well recently a division of the UN called the broad band commission put out a report. This 70 page+ report (Edit: If this link doesn't work try this one, thanks to Elsa for linking it in the comments) about what should happen to the internet and included a section on video games. Which at the conference it was presented Anita Sarkeesian and Zoe Quinn were there to support the report. (Note: Recently Zoe Quinn has claimed she does not support the report and only saw it the day she got to the UN, but it's up to you how far you wish to trust this in the circumstances). Now I'm going to focus on the report in question here rather than the rather insane things Zoe and Anita said while there.

So what does the report say about video games?

Core roots of mainstreaming violence. There is widespread representation of VAWG in mainstream culture, including in contemporary and popular music, movies, the gaming industry and the general portrayal of women in popular media. Recent research on how violent video games are turning children, mostly boys, into ‘killing zombies’118 are also a part of mainstreaming violence. And while the presentation and analysis of this research is beyond the scope of this paper119, the links to the core roots of the problem are very much in evidence and cannot be overlooked.

For those who don't yet know VAWG isn't a sex term it's the abbreviation used for the term "Violence against Women and Girls". Or as Anita was calling in 2 videos ago "Gendered Violence". But clearly reference 118 must be some heavy scientific research right? I mean this is pretty much the main paper being used to claim games are turning children into killing zombies. Heck the report doesn't even give a balanced representation of video games research it just deliberately obfuscates the research counter to this. Like say the research shown on BBC Horizon recently. So what is source 118 and what does it show. Well it's this one "PROGRAMMED TO KILL - Video Games, Drugs, and The ‘New Violence’ " So lets take a look at some choice quotes.

Yet Littleton was only the most notorious of at least eight similar such incidents carried out by child killers, “Manchurian Children,” who learned their deadly skills from video games, and their scenarios from Hollywood.

If this is starting to sound a bit familiar it's because it is familiar as this piece of "research" later reveals.

A day later, on March 22, ABC-TV’s news magazine “20/20” aired a 15-minute segment featuring Jack Thompson, the attorney for Steger and other Paducah parents in their suit. Also featured is Lt. Col. David Grossman, Army Psychologist, who proves the role of the video games in training killers, and desensitizing the users to violence.
The “20/20” segment also showed that the video games industry is counterattacking—using the FBI as their defense! Interviewed on the show, the current (unnamed) Chief Executive Officer of id Software, makers of Doom and Quake, had a ready-made line: FBI statistics allegedly show that violent crime has “fallen” for the past nine years, while the video game industry has grown to a $7-billion-a-year enterprise, even bigger than the movies. “20/20” and id Software’s CEO insist that it’s a right of “free speech” to make products as violent as the user “wants.” Their “free speech” argument is the same one used by advocates of drug legalization..

Now if this piece of research seems a little one sided that's because it is. Most of it is a retread of the claims made by none other than the video game boogeyman himself Jack Thompson. It's quite funny really as the sources for this piece of "research" include "1. Nintendo of America, Inc.: Manufactures Pokémon, Game-Boys, and equipment for satanic video games." and of course "3. Sony Computer Entertainment: Equipment for satanic video games. Was a defendant in the lawsuit on behalf of the three girls killed by video game addict Michael Carneal, the 14-year-old shooter in Paducah, Kentucky.". You read that right this report is seriously based on religious Zealot esc pieces calling games satanic.

Oh but if you thought that's all that was wrong with the UN broadband commission report you've seen nothing yet. You see someone called Jaime Bravo looked into the UN Broadband commission report and more specifically the citations. Here's what they found.

Credit to Jamie Bravo and Super Nerd Land for the chart.

Now if over 20% of the sources not being there and only 47% would meet the level expected of the average 1st year college Freshman. It suggests the report maybe has some problems in it, that's not to mention one of the citations actually cited the computer path to the document that was downloaded on the persons PC and into their documents.

Just when you thought it could get worse. Well there's an unconfirmed rumor that this is mostly based on a previous UN broad band commission report from many years ago.

If anyone does wish to read the report feel free or I can give you the highlight in a later blog but this combined with Anita and Zoes comments would make criticism of them illegal. Criticism of any organisation working to enforce "internet law" an offense. Oh and they'd be punishable by Jail time. The report also goes on to claim how online pornography is leading to sex trafficking and suggest that's a problem.

In short the report is a huge piece asking for people to censor the internet because somehow that will save the world and solve all it's problems.

The ESRB'slatest report actually is very different the last years to, with Mobile considered a separate group. The average age of a game player being 35 for men and 43 for women. It also estimates that over 50% of Us homes now own a dedicated games playing console of some kind. Also only 39% of people playing games are playing social game (so Zynga won't be happy)

So I should really ask the questions.

Has anyone read the report yet? (I mean Polygon didn't despite writing an article in support of the UN report.)

Are you glad to see the ESRB stand up to this?

How much longer do you think this latest push to censor games will last now?


9:44 PM on 09.29.2015

I'm thinking that thanks to #Pigate (Alleged pig fucking by UK PM) I really shouldn't do a review of Squishy the Suicidal Pig but damn it's so tempting to ham it up with lame jokes.


10:24 AM on 09.29.2015

To fix the Cblog video embed for those having trouble. 1) Switch to code source on the Cblog mode. 2) Use the youtube embed code. 3) Delete the


around the code if the editor puts them in by default.


4:13 AM on 09.29.2015

Can I have some More: Mystical Ninja Starring Goemon

Ok so I know there's a sequel to this game but we don't talk about that because it turned into a 2D adventure game without most of what made this game great for some quick cashing in because as true as it is now it was also true back then #FuckKonami. Even back on the N64 Konamia still was still being a dick. Oh and boy was Mystical Ninja Starring Goemon great.

For those who've never experienced this is pure madness pretty much. Mystical Ninja Starring Goemon is a slightly tongue in cheek adventure game very much in the same vein as Legend of Zelda Ocarina of time but with a very Japanese feel to the game. Also the game very much was tongue in cheek. The main character Goemon uses his pipe as a weapon and a later upgrade is the chainpipe which is basically the Legend of Zelda hookshot. There's Yae the female secret agent who gets the power to block projectiles with her sword. There's Saksuke a robotic Ninja who has the power to fire his hair at people as a weapon (yes really) and rounding out the cast is Ebisumaru a fat pervert who wields a giant hammer. Oh I almost forgot there's one other character. Impact

Yes You just watched that, Impact is a giant robot you summon to take on some of the giant bosses and the Impact fights are done in a rather spectacular first person fighting mode. which honestly probably makes it one of the best power rangers esc games in a long time despite not really trying.

The story is as follows. The Fashion loving Peach Mountain Gang want to use a giant space station mounted laser to turn the entire world into a stage for dancing you must stop them. No really you read that right.

In the Zelda tradition you can increase your life by collecting certain items, however unlike Legend of Zelda these come in the form of Lucky Cat statues, each giving you part towards another bit of health and gold ones giving you a full extra bit of health. Additionally each character gains a magical power. In the case of Goemon it's a parody of Japanese anime at the time as he throws money onto his hair turning it gold which grants him bonus strength and damage bit also causes him to take slightly more damage.

Honestly for anyone who likes Zelda the first Mystical Ninja starring Goemon is something you should take the time to check out. I don't want to spoil to much more here but it's one of the most insane games ever.


3:11 AM on 09.27.2015

My Entirely Politically Correct review of: Gone Home

Price: £14.99 / $19.99 / €19.99 (On Steam)

Platform: PC (See FAQ for spec this take you to my main blogsite)

Review Bit:

Firstly this review was written by me but in the interest of political correctness it has been run through a political correctness language correction too, to remove inherent bias in the name of inclusivity. If however you wish to read my highly politically incorrect review click here (Note: This link takes you to my other blog site and off Dtoid, I'm still trying to figure a way to post something and have it hidden on Destructoid and am experimenting with it for the futre) Therefore expect it to make far less sense than normal . What I have to do something different with my review as it's Gone Home by now most people have an opinion on it. Hell from what I'd heard of the game (a lot of perfect or near perfect scores) and what I'd seen of the game (Watching some lets plays) I had a view on this game.  So no this time the review makes no sense for a deliberate reason which kind of ruins the fun of grammar MRA Atheist overly hairy scrotums doesn't it?

So I decided to do something that many will yell I should have done earlier on. I played the game.

So has my opinion of Gone Home changed much by playing it? Yes in that I no longer think it' the worst piece of junk out there at least to me.

So with Gone Home I feel it can only be reviewed by breaking the game into two distinct chunks. On one hand the technical aspects and on the other the story.

Technically it's arse. I mean real arse. My machine as laptops go is a bit of a beast and well the game was playable on medium settings. Even then at times it chugged or seemed to lose frames and honestly the recording of it in Raptr is even worse. Maybe the background replay recording impacted the game but if so it's the first time I've ever known such a thing happen at least to that degree. It actually seemed to get worse when I reloaded saves having moved objects round in the game as though it was loading everything into my computers memory in one go and not properly unloading things when not needed / being used. It may be some issue with it being Windows 8, It may be due to using an AMD graphics card. Whatever the case I could either play with poor textures or at less than 10 frames per second, oh and even at the highest setting, the graphics still didn't look amazing. Also I crashed the game 5 times just by changing the graphics settings and the game just stopped running and shut off for no apparent reason. It also should be commended for having the option to turn off motion blur and a working FOV slider.

Mechanically it's extremely simple, you pick up objects and put them down, there are a few puzzles in the game but most barely require though and have the answer either outright given to you, or sat right next to the puzzle itself.  At best it's comparable to a hidden object game were interacting with the right object will at times advance the narrative story.

Narrative wise the story is admittedly well done. It is a fairly unique use of the medium to push people to discover the story on their own to quite such an extent. The main story surrounding Sam (your characters sibling) and Lonnie is well done, it's also cliche trash. Well done cliche trash mind but it's the kind of story that was present in 1980's lesbian Pulp Novels such that the trope became almost a joke itself. The additional stories of the Parent falling for a colleague at work and then getting Friend Zoned by him, was ok enough. The story of the main characters Parent and the relationship to the Relative that previously owned the house is a weird interesting one with no definite conclusion only speculation over possible abuse, though with some of the items about it also suggests some kind of accidental drugging thanks to the presence of morphine boxes about. The other story is the Parent and his work as a writer such as his work with AV machine reviews and his previously less than successful novels which were being reprinted. The Parent then seems ready to suggest publishing another novel if the company are willing to do it. It's also strongly suggested the Parent found out about the Parents feelings for one of her colleagues and booked them onto a couples counselling retreat to make sure their marriage is ok.

I will praise part of the narrative of Gone Home for such a successful bait and switch. The game initially very much has the set up of a horror game with the house in darkness a strange mystery and vague implications of the house being the person with symptoms of a mental disorder house and some kind of dark incident in its past. Along with this the game mentions plenty of clues about a possible haunting, even  if a lot of the events can be explained away by a wage earner pointing out the house has wiring problems and a few creaky board.

Also worthy of credit are the moments of humour such as the changing on screen text showing your characters reaction to things. For example the slight disgust at finding condoms in her parents room, or the shocked reaction to finding hidden porn stashes belonging to members of the house.  Or the shock and then refusal to re-read a piece of her siblings diary detailing her siblings sex life.

I'll also say I'm not sure if it was brave or a foolish design mistake by the developer to structure the game so it's extremely easy to miss a good chunk of the later story as skip almost to the end without finding out some of the more dramatic incidents that occurred.


A fairly technically inept and mechanically vapid game whose only real high point is a well told story. Though it isn't an inherently new story, just a fairly new approach to gaming outside of some obscure Twine games. The Story in the end isn't particularly new and comes off as a well done but in the end ultimately cliche story. It's like say the film Love Actually or the earlier Dresden Files books enjoyable enough and well done but very much cliche and retreading old ground of past works and sticking to a genre formula. It has nice touches in it every now and again from the few bits of humor to the music from what I'm guessing is an actual band, but they're just that nice touches on a fairly generic tale. I'd say how well it managed to play the market and abundance of rather poor youtube fodder poor quality horror games is more to its credit but I don't think such a move will work with the upcoming title Tacoma.

I finished the game in a little over 3 hours (including close to 30 minutes sorting out the graphics and testing the settings.) for the price I paid of about £3 ~$4.50 it was nice enough but nothing special. The problem is the game's regular price is £14.99 ($19.99) and it is most definitely not worth that price. It's very much trying to price itself closer to being an almost premium indie title and at least for me it's really not worth it.

I'm not recommending it and would only say it's worth it for people who are very new to gaming or don't play games at all or those who just really do genuinely enjoy hidden object games as it's one of the best of them.

In the end all Gone Home has done is made me a bit more interested to read the review and watch some lets plays ofTacoma to see if it does manage to do something different or if it does the same kind of switch again.


2 out of 6



1:39 PM on 09.26.2015

So I'm seeing plenty of uproar coming about Rinse and Repeat and how it's some great double standard because Twitch isn't letting people stream a game with gay guys. My ex Boyfriend the Space Tyrant isn't banned. Go stream it


6:33 PM on 09.25.2015

If certain people get their way. The following quickpost will be breaking the law. I find Anita Sarkeesian to be a poor researcher and making a highly manipulative series that misrepresents actual research. See you all in Jail people.


11:17 AM on 09.24.2015

How to get me to care for VR. Make this TV show a game on it

Ok this is going to be one of those "Yeh the UK is weird so deal with it" things but I just really stumbled upon this and it brought back memories and now we're in an age where VR tech isn't a specialist thing.

So picture the scene you're a kid whose just rushed home from school to turn on the kids TV shows (then unlike now the kids shows were very much only on at very limited times and there was no youtube). A new show is starting out a sort of game show about VR and a sort of spiritual sucessor to Knightmare. Welcome to the weird and Wacky world of Virtually Impossible. A TV show that set one contestant into a virtual world to try and win back video gaming from the mega corprotation now holding it randsom. (Man if EA, Ubisoft or Konami had a sense of humor they'd publish this with them as the evil company aswell as a joke) To win it back they must score over a certain ammount in the 4 games, normally a 3D platformer like game called Tetris Towers, A Dungeon crawler, a strage spaceship flight sim and a kart racer.

Yes that's a fish swimming in cyberspace with a nose. Yes that's a kids TV show about playing VR games. Also a very useless piece of information is the games actually ran really badly. Behind the scenes talk on the show revealed the developers of the games you see were told the specs of the machines months in advance and so produced the best looking titles they could to max out the spec. The problem was when they arrived on set the machines given were vastly less powerful for the titles and so they had to do as much technical meddling as they could to get the games running just about (albeit running quite badly). With Modern VR technology it's almost shocking to me that no-one has yet tried to make this to give everyone who grew up as saw it a chance to now feel like they're taking part in it and vicariously relive a bit of their youth. Only this time being able to play it themselves not just watch.

Oh and for those of you who want to watch the rest of the cheesey UK show part 2 and part 3 of the first episode are also on youtube.



4:47 PM on 09.23.2015

Jed Why do you hate Hot Ryu ? [img][/img]


12:59 AM on 09.23.2015

Just a Reminder, this is part of the Official Last of Us special Sale. [img][/img] And you thought Amibo were a cheap cash in.


12:33 AM on 09.21.2015

Explaining the insanity around Gamechangers.

So as you Might have seen Rockstar commented about Gamechangers, they're also suing the BBC over it. So I think it's worth wading into this mess to see what's going on and talk about the show.

BBC presented Gamerchangers as a factual drama and claimed that some scenes and parts had been changed for increased dramatic effect.

If Rockstar are to be believed they took some pretty huge liberties with events.

So first the actual show itself. It was alright. If you have a relative or some-one who has no idea of Jack Thompson etc you can show them it to give them a vague idea who he is and what went on. It's mildly entertaining (look the BBC's output has far lower points than this). I will say it may have been a bit more Harsh on Sam Houser showing him as a bit coarse and abrasive but ultimately showing him as an artist chasing his vision. The show also seem to show Jack Thompson in a bit more of a sympathetic light and downplayed quite how nuts he went at points and almost entirely ignoring Jack Thompson going after other companies too about the only real show of Thompsons nasty streak were in side mentions and a short scene where he organises a protest outside of Rockstar.

 I don't think there was really anything to be up in arms over as some developers seem to think. It did to game development what the film hackers did to the idea of being a hacker.

 Now plenty of people have been directing a few bits of well disgust at Rockstars reaction to this and as such I think even not knowing Sam Houser and Rockstar I can shed some light over some of the matters and the reason for the lawsuit.

 Firstly as dumb as it sounds Rockstar had to sue the BBC under US law. Sounds dumb right but part of the US copyright system means that any time your Intellectual Property is used without your permission you must defend it or it could set a precedent.

Bethesda most likely didn't want to Sue Mojang over the use of Scrolls but in the US legal system Scrolls being allowed to exist unchallenged would mean that Bethesda were setting a precedent that anyone could use the name scrolls. So if some Greenlight yahoo unity game came out called The Bellder Scrolls then due to the precedent set of Mojang Scrolls going unchalleneged it would give the yahoo a legal defence for his games name. Dumb I know but hey that's the US legal system.

The reason Rockstar is suing the BBC is because the BBC didn't get permission to use the Rockstar name, The Logo and the name of the property Grand Theft Auto. That's most likely part of the present lawsuit and Rockstar had no real choice as to not challenge it would allow someone to set up as Cockstar studios making Band Theft Auto and have legal ammo to then defend against a copyright claim.

The second part is having gone through what it has and the present climate surrounding games and the idea they can cause harm in the real world (now influencing people's views like a shady puppet master than outright programming them) Rockstar are likely on edge. The BBC have been accused of biased reporting in the past such as the infamous Atheism+ blockbot of undesirables, which I'm proud to announce I'm considered a level 1 threat (level 3 being the top) on. Let's just say Rockstar were worried that the corpse of Jack Thompson's campaign might be brought back, a new depending on how this was portrayed. That is if it did present it as Thompson being right and them being monsters.

For them Thompson represented an actual threat to destroy them and they really didn't want something showing his fight as some great righteous fight against a company of pure evil. What we got more in the show was showing the clash between the self righteous Bible thumping Thompson calling for help from God on a Golf Course (pictured above) and the somewhat free creative youth spirit and dedication to art of Sam Houser and Rockstar.

So there we go I've dug into what's gone on or at least what I think has and the far more likely reason Rockstar actually sued the BBC over what amounts to BBC doing to game development what Hackers did to code junkies.


7:12 AM on 09.20.2015

This time and space is being reserved for another blog next week, It'll make sen


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