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Ode To The Automatic Shotgun
TheDRMaster | 2:35 PM on 03.26.2010 15 comments



Hell yes!


Ladies and Gentlemen, I am here to commemorate one of the most amazing and deadly weapons found in the modern shooter: the automatic shotgun. Often overlooked and unfortunately replaced by longer-range weapons (read: LeetSnipers), these weapons are the true man's guns. Whether it be the Modern Warfare 2's AA12, Bad Company 2's USAS-15, or Borderlands' many "Sweeper Shotguns", these guns are all around you. Here is why YOU should be the badass motherf*cker using these deadly pieces of machinery:

1) It takes just enough skill to not be considered cheap


Follow the Vladov rule: you don't need to be a better shot, you just need to shoot more bullets! Precisely. You can run into a room and clear it of several enemies in seconds flat with an auto-shotty. After you're done annihilating the enemy team, one whiner can call shenanigans, claiming auto-shotties are "cheap". The great thing with auto-shotties is that you can have two points to rebute his statement: A) Auto-shotties have low ammo and B) Auto-shotties have poor range (but that's no problem for YOU!). Now the whiner's argument has been nullified and you can proceed with killing him a multitude of times.


2) It's hilarious to kill snipers with an auto-shotty



Did some asshole sniper just put a bullet in your noggin from across the map? Does the bastard deserve payback? Hell yes he does. And there's no better way to do so than putting 350 12-gauge rounds in him per minute. But to do so takes some skill. You gotta be sneaky, you gotta be stealthy. You gotta get in close. Even though it may be difficult, the end result is extremely satisfying.


3) You feel like a badass (it's because you are)



You are holding 7.3 kg of hot, automatic death in your hand. Screw those wussies with their pump-action Spas-12's or their SEMI-auto Strikers. No, your gun shoots fully auto. And that makes you about 200x scarier, and about 9001x more badass. So they can shoot you once, that's cool. In the same time it takes for them to pump, you can shoot them 4 times already. That's possibly the best thing ever and you know it.

4) They mount them on unmanned tanks



Hell yeah they do.



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13 comments | showing # 1 to 13
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Elsa's Avatar - Comment posted on 03/26/2010 16:04
Elsa
I can't seem to get the hang of shotguns. I suck at shotties in Killzone, MAG and other games.
... I do like knives though! (hopefully you'll continue this blog into a series and do an ode to knives!)
Occams electric toothbrush's Avatar - Comment posted on 03/26/2010 17:03
Occams electric toothbrush
Automatic shotguns are neat.

Knives are neat.

Combine the two and get a super neat thing?
Elsa's Avatar - Comment posted on 03/26/2010 17:26
Elsa
I like the way Occams thinks! :)
dragracedude's Avatar - Comment posted on 03/26/2010 20:42
dragracedude
9001x? wait...THATS OVER NINE THOUSAND!!
SimonSaysDie's Avatar - Comment posted on 03/26/2010 22:07
SimonSaysDie
@Occams: That's called a flechette gun, son.

In FPSes, I tend to go for shotguns. I like to be up close and personal when I bring down my enemies.
pedrovay2003's Avatar - Comment posted on 03/26/2010 22:12
pedrovay2003
That last picture is amazing.
Monodi's Avatar - Comment posted on 03/26/2010 23:51
Monodi
The awesome thing about Counter-Strike: Source is the wide amount of weapons, and the auto-shotgun is always a hit-and-run delicacy.
Occams electric toothbrush's Avatar - Comment posted on 03/27/2010 02:16
Occams electric toothbrush
@SimonSaysDie: I thought about that but I always thought flechettes were more like tiny darts? Though I guess they could be like tiny stiletto daggers.
Caspulex's Avatar - Comment posted on 03/27/2010 08:01
Caspulex
Shotguns and scatterguns have done nothing for me but cause extreme fun and cause my enemies to rage.

Though, on the sniper rule, it's equally fun to blow his nest out (and any sniper friends he has) with a bazooka shot, but that's Day of Defeat: Source achievements talking.

Dang. I think I'm gonna load up Saints Row 2 and enjoy the unlimited ammo mixed with auto shotgun action.
FatherChesz's Avatar - Comment posted on 03/27/2010 21:17
FatherChesz
The AA-12 is pretty badass, but I watched a man hold it upside down and fire it with his pinky. Seems like something so ridiculously powerful should have at least a little kick to it.
TheDRMaster's Avatar - Comment posted on 03/27/2010 21:45
TheDRMaster
@FatherChesz

That was the point, it has a crapload of power without sacrificing control or accuracy...so badass.
Beezy603's Avatar - Comment posted on 03/28/2010 16:25
Beezy603
if they could make a shotgun the size of a handgun but retains all it's original power I'd shit myself
SimonSaysDie's Avatar - Comment posted on 03/29/2010 00:40
SimonSaysDie
@Occams: More futuristic flechette guns are more like metal darts or shards.

@Beezy: I think that those might exist already, but I'm not sure.
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