The following is an interview that took place a few weeks ago for the British newspaper the Daily Evening.

DailyEvening: So what inspired you to make “Left 4 Bed”?

TYS: Well, ever since I was a small child I’ve always had a fascination with rape. I think it all started the first time I ever saw Phil the Wonder Rapist in action. Watching him rape his was to victory in the 92 games was one of the most spectacular thing I’ve ever seen, I mean seriously, those elephants had to be put down after he was done. Simply amazing.


Phil the Wonder Rapist

DE: So what effect do you think “Left 4 Bed” has had on your life?

TYS: Well, Left 4 Bed hasn’t just changed my life, it’s changed the world.
It’s changed attitudes, I mean, before “Left 4 Bed” came out, rape was taboo, you know? People were too scared to talk about it. Now though, everyone can openly talk about last Saturday night when they raped that ginger paraplegic bird in the alley behind Marks and Spencers.

It’s also physically changed the world, I mean, we all obviously know about the tragedy that happened in the Philippines when the video came out. I honestly never expected to overload their tubes. My heart goes out to the families of those who passed away.


The aftermath of the 08' tube explosion

DE: Yes, we can only hope they can rebuild the countries entire infrastructure and economy soon so they can pull themselves back out of this carnage.

TYS: The one good thing about this situation is that it has brought the issue of catastrophic tubes overload to the public. Perhaps now we may never again have to witness another meme related disaster.

DE: We can only hope. Moving on however, how would you say Left 4 Bed has effected your life personally?

TYS: Well, being “Internet Famoose™” has of course totally changed my life forever. I receive almost a constant stream of “Internets” that I have won. I’m running out of room to store them.
I’ve also hung out with other “weblebrities”, (here are two facts you probably didn’t know about Chuck Norris, he has an almost psychotic lust for shemales, and he does NOT know how to share his drugs).

DE: Have you had any romantic involvement with any internet celebs?

TYS: Well, Master Chief is a pretty cool guy, but he takes me out for dinner and doesn’t call me back for anything.

Also Chris Crocker is one sexy female. She let me do anal.

At this point I was forced to do a high five with The Young Scot

DE: Umm, ok. So what’s next for TYS? Can we expect more rape videos in the future?

TYS: In the future? What about right now?


[i] It was at this point that I saw a previously unnoticed camera pointing in my general direction, hidden on a bookshelf. With the fury and agility of a flaming gorilla, TYS was out of his chair and on top of me.
I’d rather not talk about what happened next, my lawyer says I should keep quiet until the trial is over. However it was safe to say that at this point, the interview was most certainly over.
Pray for me dear reader, pray for me [/i]