So tonight and tomorrow there will be mass blogging about Final Fantasy XIII. The rabid PS3 and 360 fanboys have already let their freak flags fly over it. In the weeks to come PS3 fanboys will be touting its superior graphics while the 360 guys will be hoping to flaunt higher sales numbers.



They will wage war over FFXIII because its formerly one of Playstation's exclusive franchises (I guess everyone missed FFXI) and much like Resident Evil and Metal Gear Solid before it, its another sign that console exclusives are a thing of the past with third parties.

Sony fanboys have, and will continue to, cry over a lack of "loyalty" on Square-Enix's part and claim that Final Fantasy will suffer a loss of quality just for touching the 360. Kinda like how Final Fantasy "lost its way" when it stopped being sprite-based and moved on from Nintendo to Sony, this according to ardent Nintendo fanboys of the time.

But that's just the tip of the iceberg, there's all kinds of other fanboys that actual, returning fans and newcomers will feel the insanity of with the arrival of FFXIII.

Weeaboos. Do I even need to get into it? They're still not over FFX's dub, they'll be here. They'll pretend to give the FFXIII English dub a chance and proceed to start crabbing about it, nothing in English can meet the Japanese gold standard they assume to be the best, even if they don't really know Japanese at all.

But the most notorious Final Fantasy fanboy is the FFVII Fanboy. Just like the Weeaboo Brigade, they're going to put Final Fantasy XIII under the microscope and pretend to give it a fair shake. In reality, judgment has already been passed and FFXIII has failed in their eyes.



But that's because they've built an alter to FFVII and believe it is the Alpha and Omega of the franchise and, by extension, they believe themselves to be the beginning and the end of the fanbase. Your opinion does not matter, if you are not an FFVII fanboy, you are not relevant to them.

Most often, they cannot even articulate their opinions beyond, "Final Fantasy VII is the greatest RPG ever!" Talk about any RPG at all and they will jump in to say that. They don't have anything else to add in terms of substance, just that.

And they're just like the rabid Western RPG fanboy. I'm not talking about the guys started with Wizardry and Dungeons and Dragons, but the guys that started with Knights of the Old Republic and Mass Effect.

They're the same as the FFVII Fanboy. They reek of First Kiss Syndrome and use the same thread of logic - "[Bioware RPG] is the greatest RPG ever." You don't see the Diabolo or Elder Scrolls fans acting like this. They like what they like and they're too busy with what they like to waste time on forums declaring what's the best.

If you can get either the FFVII Fanboy or the Bioware Fanboy to open up a little for a reason, for the FFVII Fanboy the reason its "story" and for the KOTOR guy its "choice." While this does define one difference between JRPGs and WRPGs, the reasoning is painfully one-note, because this is all you can ever get out of them. The Bioware Fanboy thinks Bioware invented choice, while the FFVII Fanboy thinks Aerith's death is the most gut-wrenching, emotional thing ever.

Metroid hatchling hit me harder, just sayin'. The Bard's Tale also did the whole "chronic asshole by choice" thing before Bioware ever did it.

And again, similar to the fans who feel Final Fantasy lost its way by going 3D, there's the artist they Yoshitaka Amano fanboys love to hate because he took over with that shift - Tetsuya Nomura. No longer was Yoshitaka Amano the lead artist of the franchise, but this guy. And they'll blame Nomura for anything that happens with Final Fantasy, even if he's not directly involved.

Never mind the fact that no one ever asked Amano if he really cared that he had been displaced. I mean, the guy's an artist and not a game designer. Not doing Final Fantasy lets Amano have even more freedom as an artist.

But Amano should be shackled to a desk and make FF stuff forever. Nomura should be blamed for anything, even stuff you make up about him which people actually do. This is basically the view of the Amano fanboy.



This also goes back to that PS3 Fanboy "loyalty" thing. I like to call it the "Die for Darkseid" mentality.

Darkseid is a DC Comics villain and on top of that, an evil god. Your greatest gift to him is to give your all the expense of everything until you die. Darkseid wants to strip everyone of thier free will so he occupies the minds of everyone and only Darkseid exists.

Darkseid is a big Darkseid fanboy.



And FFVII fanboys, in their cult of personality, kinda do the same thing. They believe FFVII being remade is like the most important thing ever, that SE should forgo all other projects and even risk losing money just to sate their incessant need for a remake. To die making an FFVII remake is to die for Darkseid!

There's more. I could keep going on the topic, but I'm gonna leave it at this. I think I've shown enough faces of insanity.

If you're new to the franchise as a whole, I'm going to ask you do yourself a favor and do not visit Final Fantasy related forums and possibly consider a media blackout. The freaks are about to come out yet again. You should have fun with your shiny, new FFXIII.

And dear god, don't go to Gamefaqs forums about Final Fantasy right now, that's just asking for it.