<p>DESTRUCTOID CARDS: CARD HARDER WITH A VENGEANCE HD REMIX ALPHA EDITION
The end is nigh! The afterthoughts at the bottom will explain precisely what that means. HEAVEN OR HELL! Booster Pack 11: The Workmeng Cometh Kryptinite card notes:
Sure he spells Kryptonite incorrectly, but who cares? He's one of Destructoids resident, shall we say achievement aficionados
that took us for one helluva video game store/nostalgia trip,
critiqued survival horror gamers
and gave us another well written perspective on the "racism" controversy surrounding Resident Evil 5.
I figure that should be enough to let him spell his name however the hell he wants :) Did I mention that he learned some very important things about being a bad-ass from the Star Wars series? Ron Workman card notes:
The ying to Nieros yang (or is it the other way around?), Ron is a man of many names: NSFWorkman, Ronaldo Workmeng, Greybush etc. Regardless of what name you know him by, Ron is like the official drunk uncle (that touches you inappropriately) of Destructoid. He leaves naught but chicks making out
( scroll to the bottom), crazy birthday videos, threats of being fucked by Margerie
and an intense hatred of both Nameless Ted and Paris Hilton in his wake. Also lots and lots of empty liquor bottles. Ron also has a softer side though, one that he only shows via poetic letters to Olivia Munn
in his c-blog. No, I'm not going to mention the whole Yaris 4 coming to the 360 thing. That would be beating a dead horse and would prove that I don't actually know the guy and am thus probably leaving out all sorts of great references and whatnot that a better Dtoider would know... Sorry; I blacked out there for a second. I've thrown out about a million (re: 4) links that you'll never click on, and since Ron has such a, uh, rich history I could go on forever, so I'll wrap this one up. Note that this is the single best, or worst (depending on whether you want to win or just get really trashed), card you can pull when playing the drinking game. Much like how the Niero card is an automatic win, the Ron card is an automatic lose, and whoever pulls it will be taking 10 drinks, thereby ensuring that whomever gets the card will get good and drunk good and fast. Booya! Pro-tip: for an extra fun game, make an all Workmeng deck; you'll have such a good time that you'll throw up all over each other and pass out naked in a public place. Fronz card notes:
This was a bit of a tough one since Fronz doesn't have any c-blog posts and I wasn't able to find any pictures of him on the forum, so his card is based around the two regular features that he does every week: Game Debate to the Death
and Monday Mind Teasers.
This is one of those times that my newbishness becomes apparent as I really don't know much about Fronz. Hopefully this one turned out reasonably well anyways. Dale North card notes:
(The following is paraphrased from Dales sidebar) Editor extraordinaire at Tomopop
and Destructoid, editor-in-chief at Japanator, freelance writer, musician,
member of The OneUps
(who appear to be playing at PAX this year :D) and Videogame music remixer.
Dale North is clearly a pretty talented guy, but one wonders why he always seems to be flipping the camera off in every picture that he's in. In delving into this mystery I discovered some shocking things that I described in the second ability on Dales card. Mr. North is also a fan of Welsch Corgis (hence the Ein, of Cowboy Bebop fame, ability icons) and an un-fan of Mac & Cheese People. Mr. Sadistic card notes:
The ever-present Mr. Sadistic has a bit of a thing for the newbies. You can be sure that Mr. Sadistic will be there to welcome the new kids with open arms and a tender "I love you", thereby helping to ease their entry into the world of Destructoid. Either that or it creeps them out and scares them off ;) When Sadistic isn't letting newbies know that they're welcome at Destructoid, he's busy writing somewhat homosexual love notes to Destructoid
(see the last picture) or facepalming at Clinton Vs. Obama: SMACKDOWN!
videos. Oh and Mr. Sadistic? I love you :) Afterthoughts
Well I've got some bad news: it looks like I won't have as much time as I thought to work on the cards before I leave, so there'll probably only be one more booster pack, and I'm also not sure if I'll be able to tune up the older cards like I was planning. I feel kind of bad because there were so many people that requested cards as well as many people that I personally wanted to do that I'm just not going to be able to get to. Mayhaps I'll start doing these again once I get back home, but that won't be until September. If all goes well, the final card count for this summer will end up being 85, which, if my Fourier transform and orthogonal polynomial calculations are correct, is about 85% of what I was planning on doing, so that ain't too bad. As to who will be in the last pack; I think that I'll keep that a secret (partly because I haven't really decided and partly because I don't know how many of them I'll be able to do). Last thing: before I leave for the rest of the summer I'll be making a wrap up post with links to .rar files containing all of the photoshop files and jpegs that I've made/worked with. Random quote... EXECUTE! â€œI never drink anything stronger than gin before breakfast.â€¯ ~W.C. Fields</p>