Over the first couple of days returning to school, one thing has crossed my mind: freshman girls. Now this is my third year attending college and last year there were freshman girls, but I saw them more as little sisters and they were a bit too close to my age for my liking.

There is the high school teacher pedophile creed of “Man, I get older, but these girls stay the same age.” And this goes further than that. This summer, a friend and I indulged in an anime called Fruits Basket. In the anime, one of the characters writes erotic fiction as a career and has a hidden obsession with high school girls. There’s a particular scene where he’s cleaning up the house in preparation for a visit from said girls and he sings a brief funny/creepy song:



I came up with my own version of the song that simply switches “high school” to “freshman,” and it has the same effect; I’m perceived as a creepy pervert. Of course, I do this all for irony, while my roommates are actually the ones who are obsessed with the "youngins."

While tweeting about the subject, I came up with the brilliant game pitch for Ubisoft’s 100+ games in the Imagine series: Imagine Freshman Girls. In this game you follow the day to day lives of your choice of one of seven freshman girls including the activities of:

-showering
-panty pillow fights
-deciding on what to wear for the day
-trying on clothes
-subtlety degrading your friends’ individual self-esteems
-shop at Hot Topic
-shop at Macy’s
-shop at Victoria’s Secret
-Asking parents for money
-curling straight hair
-straightening curly hair
-gossip
-texting
-MySpace/Facebook
-Obsessing over Twilight
-Talking about the boys they like
-Talking about cute boys
-Bragging about their relations
-tripping when going up stairs
-running into people in the hallways
-standing and staring blankly in public places
-order food and get full after one bite
-suck horribly at Guitar Hero/Rock Band
-going to the bathroom with other girls
-make-up
-shave legs if not wearing jeans
-wear jeans
-Starbucks
-bake
-Listen to Death Cab for Cutie
-Listen to Taylor Swift
-Listen to Kanye
-Ask everyone in class for gum
-Obsess over the Jonas Brothers
-Complain about being too cold
-Watch MTV/MTV2/MTV7/VH1
-Watch 27 Dresses… again
-tanning
-being too hungover to come to class
-cross legs when sitting
-cross arms when standing
-fail at driving
-get knocked up

This package alone would satisfy the needs of creepers of all ages. Considering the Imagine series is geared towards women, why not gear it towards men also. This could be the start to a series of games such as Imagine Fratboy and Imagine Douchebag, but that would be redundant…