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TehBuLL Reviews : Pomegranates
TehBuLL | 12:44 AM on 03.02.2009 12 comments


In the last couple of years there has been a strong new comer in the world of fruit hot on the heels of the 90's cranberry craze. That new contender for title of 'other juice added' is pomegranate juice. It is easy to see why pomegranates would show up on the scene after cranberries because their flavor and defining characteristics are similar in pure juice form. But there is one deep dark secret about pomegranates.


[spoiler] if u don't want to know the deep dark secret, you should stop here[/z]

They are impossible to eat. Inside this normal looking fruit is an orgy of tasty, ready to burst tiny fruit seed things. My main complaint here is that these do not spill out of the fruit like the treasure chest it should be. No, these things are basically glued to the inner rind of the fruit and only through pure effort can some of them be extracted. Some is the key word here because it is inevitable that half of the bastards will explode, rendering both the fruit and any amount of accomplishment you were taking in extracting it void.


After smashing the entire fruit and eventually getting a bountiful palm full of hard earned fruit kernels, I would love to say it was worth it. But it isn't. Overall you will get basically no juice from the individual kernels and you will feel cheated out of both time and money. Sure that small amount tastes great, but your mouth will be left dry and begging for more and your brain knows that it just isn't going to happen.

Color : 7
Taste : 8
Accessibility to humans : 0
Ability to be turned into something better by giant corporations with machines : 10

Overall - 4 (Dont Bother. There are better things in the world and your life is short.)



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8 comments | showing # 1 to 8
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s0lesurviv0r's Avatar - Comment posted on 03/02/2009 02:13
s0lesurviv0r
Yea, cranberry-pomegranite juice is great(especially mixed with green tea), but screw the fruit.
CWal37's Avatar - Comment posted on 03/02/2009 02:42
CWal37
Such a bitch of a fruit to eat. Awesome review, totally spot on. Pomegranate innards need a nerf.
thefil's Avatar - Comment posted on 03/02/2009 08:05
thefil
This is one of those comments where I want to let the authour know I appreciate the sentiment, but have nothing to contribute to the conversation.
The Bez's Avatar - Comment posted on 03/02/2009 10:42
The Bez
to get to the fruit you so greatly desire submerge an open pomegranate in water and it will be much, much easier to get the seeds out.
BakaTanuki's Avatar - Comment posted on 03/02/2009 12:16
BakaTanuki
This fruit is a trap. Tasty though
mix's Avatar - Comment posted on 03/02/2009 14:32
mix
Awesome review, but I detect a hint of bias in it. Did Mr. Banana slip you a $5?
TehBuLL's Avatar - Comment posted on 04/19/2009 04:36
TehBuLL
i clicked everyone of those links and all i got was a hate for chairs.
Mary Firefighter's Avatar - Comment posted on 05/13/2011 09:55
Mary Firefighter
Thanks for your patience and sorry for the inconvenience!
Best regards, Mary, CEO of small business seo and iscsi mpio windows 2008
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