Dude, violent games rule. Because itís fucking fun you know? I am getting sick and tired of these liberal pussies whining about this shit. They need to get their heads out of their asses, and listen to somebody who is ARTICULATE about this crap. AKA: me. So shut your mouth, stop moaning and I will tell you itís all about man.
1 Violent games are fucking fun you know
Dude, what is the difference between violent games and nonviolent games? Violent games are FUCKING FUN, thatís what! What is more fun than playing Call of Warfare and shooting a whole bunch of people in the face? Itís awesome, man. My favourite part was in that airport, and all these people were just standing there, I mean, they did not even have a gun, and I had this rad AK or something and I was like: letís rock and roll! I mowed those suckers down like a fucking champ: I was kicking ass. That shit was FUCKING FUN.
2 Violent games make me think about other shit
Dude, my life is hectic. I got so much crap going on, I am telling you. Life in college is busy, especially if a difficult course like I am doing: marketing is where itís at, baby! But fuck man, itís not just school, I got responsibilities. My buddies in the team count on me to rock the pitch for training and games, GO HAWKS! The babe wants me to take her out all the time. I mean, she is cute and all, but fuck, get off my back sometimes, you know what Iím saying? And almost forgot the boys in Omega Delta, you guys rule! I just have to get away sometimes; you know what I mean, get it out of my system. Thatís what games are for, dude, they take my mind of shit.
Dude, like this one game, postman or whatever itís called, you do some sick stuff to people man, it cracks me up every time. It takes me to another place, like that one time my bro Dexter got this mad pot: shit was on another level! Flying hiiiigh like a dragon!
3 Violent games donít make kids do bad stuff
Dude, all the communists that say violent games make kids go crazy have no idea what they are talking about. When this Lanza went all fucking mental on those poor kids, those media pricks began blaming this game Mass Respect or some shit. Man, I have never even played that game, that crap just look too geeky like Star Wars and shit and I ainít no nerd man. But screw those dicks who donít know what they are talking about, because I know why they are saying these dumb things.
Dude, they been playing the wrong games! Fuck, if I had a kid, I donít want the child playing Brass Effect either, that shit will let you hump an alien and everything, fucking disgusting. Games for real men, is where itís at, like Fortunate Soldier, that game kicked ass and took names.
Dude, in the entire game you run around blowing peoples headís off, shooting them in the gut and you can see the shit coming out of their stomachs, blowing all these non-Americans into pieces with a big-ass bazooka, shit is brutal man! People who hate on games should play that shit, it will make them realize the awesomeness they are missing!
Take THAT, non-Americans!
Which reminds me:
4 Violent games are for real men
Dude, if youíre a dude, you should play games for dudes. Donít play games for pussies, because that shit sucks. Play fucking GDA, thatís a real manís game for you right there. The entire game you drive around shooting whores in the chest. How fucking amazing is a game about shooting whores in the chest. You drive around in some fake-ass New York, run over a bunch of people on the side-walk, pick up some random whore, AND SHOOT HER IN THE CHEST! Yeah!
5 Bad games
Dude, and then there are these games that are clearly not for dudes. They will make you less of a dude when you play them. I did fucking research into this shit, I spend ages looking up these games that nobody plays and nobody cares for and everybody has forgotten about because they suck donkey balls. But I did it because I love you guys and I want to warn you because there is crap out there. There is this game called Partol (what a fucking stupid name anyway), and the only thing you do in that game is shoot holes in walls. What is up with that? Who cares about shooting holes in walls, fuck that shit. You know which game also sucks? A piece of shit called Journal. That game is fucking gay and everybody who plays it is fucking gay. Some dude wearing a fancy dress running around in a desert. How. Fucking. Gay. Is. That.
Fuck this shit
Dude, you better listen up because I know what I am talking about. I can educate you about this shit any day. I know there are good people out there who get confused about the crap that liberal haters write about games. They fucking brainwash people like those asshole communists in Russia do. Fuck the commies, fuck the liberals, grow a pair and play a real game. Peace bro.