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Jim Sterling
The Worst Thing Ever [NSFW]
Super Drybones | 7:28 PM on 04.04.2010 18 comments


Alone in a castle, playing with his tassle

The Drybones gazed at the sea

Ever so carefree

When out of his sight

With a bum ever tight

Came Firion from Final Fantasy 2




They began to chat

Of the man in the red hat

When Firion did have a strange stare

Not one of humble and care

As Mr. Destructoid pulled off his pants

Not nude at all it would seem

His dick did reign supreme

In a pair of overalls

There to catch his dangle balls




As they began to all kiss

Pants wet with something other than piss

Boo did come on the scene

With his best friend the Master Chief




The Drybones did cry

As Master Chief went up on his thigh

As the Boo kept disappearing

Except for the visible semen




Things were going well

For the turtle in dead shell

Until Mr. Destructoid began to grow mad

The others praise he had not had

So he began to describe

With turtle splooge in his eye

All his great accomplishments

Starting with Free Willy




So after some boney dick

He stopped being such a prick

And began to be grateful

As along came a staple




Firion and the staple were making love

As Drybones thought of his first turtle dove

A spirit whose heavenly nature was from above

And so Ekans came on the scene




And the Orgy Began

As the Drybones went through Master Chief like a bull dozer on a kitten

The Boo was ever quite smitten

With the staple he just met

The two were locked in a love net (along with their penises)




I can’t describe what happens next

As I believe Drybones have no necks

But his gazing at the sea

Ever so lonely

Was now at an end

As was Boos virginity




Someone was Watching



Is this post awesome? Vote it up!

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Those who have fapped:  revelation216  


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16 comments | showing # 1 to 16
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Velt's Avatar - Comment posted on 04/04/2010 20:19
Velt
i shed a tear.
Super Drybones's Avatar - Comment posted on 04/04/2010 21:34
Super Drybones
Dear Chelsea,

Thanks a ton you whore, I was all excited that someone commented on my blog. I love hearing from the community whether it's negative or positive, but you have managed to fuck that all up with your fucking advertising. You'll never read this(since your probably a bot), but I like to complain so here I go. I hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate HATE you!
KalosBlue's Avatar - Comment posted on 04/04/2010 21:38
KalosBlue
Takes penis out. Reads post in horror. Puts penis back in pants.....slowly takes it out again
Enkido's Avatar - Comment posted on 04/04/2010 22:46
Enkido
Someone get this man a medal.
Los255's Avatar - Comment posted on 04/04/2010 23:02
Los255
WHAT. IS. THIS.
Monodi's Avatar - Comment posted on 04/04/2010 23:45
Monodi
What.
garison's Avatar - Comment posted on 04/05/2010 00:11
garison
Oh mah ghad! This is the greatest thing ever!
Caffeine Knight's Avatar - Comment posted on 04/05/2010 01:38
Caffeine Knight
"As they began to all kiss

Pants wet with something other than piss

Boo did come on the scene

With his best friend the Master Chief "

Poetic fucking genius!!! Like Edgar Allen Poe mixed with Ron Jeremy!!

Fucking A' dawg!
ikiryou's Avatar - Comment posted on 04/05/2010 16:47
ikiryou
Ladies and Gentlemen, *this* is the Citizen Kane of lewd poetry.
Super Drybones's Avatar - Comment posted on 04/05/2010 17:00
Super Drybones
HOLY CRAP IT RHYMES!!!
walrusmustdash's Avatar - Comment posted on 04/05/2010 17:32
walrusmustdash
Gah, stupid blank post.

Wow. This is both slightly less and yet somehow far more terrifying than I thought it might be before clicking the link. You have shown me wonders in this undersea kingdom of magic, sir. I thank and curse you in the same breath!
revelation216's Avatar - Comment posted on 04/18/2010 23:58
revelation216
Fap fap fap
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