On the count of ford!

FORD!



FASTER boy! We ain't never gonna reach the bank at this rate!

*spit* Pa, the mud's gone into my shoes. It is very uncomfortable and it smells much like that time we had burritos.

Goddamn I love burritos. Anyways, we're almost there. Full speed ahead!



Honey, did you eat burritos again?

Naw Mary dear, 's just the mud.

I could swear it smelled just like...

IT WAS THE MUD OK.

...fine.





Oh! Y'see that in the distance, kids?

Y'mean that massive rock that looks like an African with a migrane?

fugahsphloosh

That's right, my little angel! It's Fort Kearney, the first stop in our AUUUUUGHGGSKHDGSKJGAJSGGHDKJGJ


Ma? MA! What's wrong, ma?



She done been bitten! 'Ey, you! Get back here! I'll punch your goddamn face in! Snake! SNAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAKE!

It's no use, pa! He's gone!

That bastard ran towards the fort! FULL SPEED AHEAD DIGIT! We're gonna AVENGE MARY JANE if it's the LAST THING I DO!

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~End of Part 1~