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About
A relatively new dad telling tales on what life is like as a gamer and a father.

- I'm the youngest of two children with one older sister.

- I'm first generation American as my parents were born in Italy.

- Married to a wonderful wife and have an amazing daughter who makes me laugh and smile every day.

- Hobbies include exercise, reading, writing, sci-fi, film, and of course, video games.


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I never cease to be amazed how even though videogames have come so far in terms of mainstream acceptance, there are times when I must contain myself accordingly when showing my enthusiasm for my favorite past-time.

At a former company, I had a good friend who was an avid gamer like myself. We had a lot in common generally speaking, and gaming was a normal topic of conversation for us. I looked forward to small breaks in the day, to take five minutes to chat about games.

At times, during our conversations, my eyes would wander to see who was eaves dropping. More times than not, you can see the glares, either of disapproval or amusement. One coworker of ours, who sat nearby once said to us, “You guys are so funny, you sound like by 10-year-old nephew.”



Is that comment supposed to be some kind of slight, since we’re two grown men, in our mid-thirties with families who just so happen to like playing videogames? No one bats an eye when a bunch of guys go on and on about their fantasy football leagues, but two guys talking about videogames? How delightfully juvenile. I wanted to tell her to eat shit and die, but I would probably have gotten called down to HR and get a stern talking to.... AGAIN!

The glares and passive aggressive comments are not only limited to strangers, casual, and professional relationships. Just a couple of weeks ago, a good friend and I were on the phone discussing Titanfall strategy. He and I have been gaming together for a long time and have no qualms geeking out and discussing games for hours on end.

In the midst of our conversation, I was delving deep on Titanfall “best practices” and the virtues of using your Burn Cards and the timely deployment of electric smoke when an enemy pilot is rodeoing you, when my wife just so happened to walk by. Her response… “you guys sound like morons.”

Now, my wife has always been supportive of my gaming past-time, and even though she was half joking, she has no idea how close she was to getting drop-kicked to the face right then and there. I had visions of pulling a Stanley Kowalski and flipping a table over and going on a diatribe about being king of the house and Huey Long or something bat shit crazy like that, but my wife is freakishly strong and would probably kick my ass.


How I look when I'm gaming.

It’s those little instances like that which makes me hesitate approaching people to talk about games in untested environments. Just last week, I noticed a co-worker wearing a graphic t-shirt with an old school NES gamepad the front. I was tempted to go over and strike up a conversation about games with him, but I stopped short and just paid him a compliment on his shirt.

Being relatively new at this company, god forbid anyone gets the wrong idea about me. My new boss could’ve caught wind of the conversation and made a beeline to HR. Sure, the new guy has over ten years of experience and is very qualified, but he was talking about games, let’s confiscate his building credentials and collect his computer., because hiring him was obviously a mistake.

I say this tongue-in cheek, but honestly, you never know. So I'm going to bide my time, wait for just the right time to strike up a conversation about games, perhaps in a dark corner, when no one is looking, like a ne'er-do-well punk from a 1950's anti-marijuana Reefer Madness character.


Hey kid... you into videogames?
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SpielerDad
10:41 AM on 04.06.2014

…Same as the old boss? Let’s hope not for Xbox One fans and game fans in general. After just under a year of monumental missteps regarding the Xbox brand and direction, Microsoft has seemingly done something right.



After touting everything the Xbox One would be capable of, other than games that is, Microsoft has named Phil Spencer the new head of Xbox, who formerly was the Corporate VP of Microsoft Game Studios.

Known around the industry as a long time gamer, it’s rather refreshing to see someone who’s passionate about gaming, being the head of a gaming division, and not just some marketing flack who wants to position the Xbox One as a glorified Texas Instruments cable set-top box.


I’M LOOKING AT YOU!

Time will tell if Spencer can right the ship after a shaky launch. Will he be able to surpass the PS4? I personally doubt it, but he can at least get the brand competitive, which I think everyone would all agree is better for the industry.

Everything he has said so far should resonate with gamers in general and Xbox One owners in particular. He believes that “…gaming is a first class citizen within the company.” I certainly hope so, because if he truly believes it isn’t, then he’s in trouble. As Spencer puts it, “you’re going to get a gaming led platform.”

Just recently, on April 3, various sites have reported that quite a few layoffs have occurred within the Xbox division. A corporate restructuring, that has impacted various positions apparently. Microsoft has been relatively mum on what positions have been eliminated, but a representative was quoted by VG247.com that “we are always evaluating our development priorities, and there are times when decisions need to be made to realign plans and refocus our efforts.”

That sucks for those who have lost jobs. I’ve been there before. I can translate that quote for you thusly, “Some overpaid asshole with an MBA misread the market, and our marketing was woefully shitty because of it, so we’re firing a bunch of people, who, of no fault of their own, were working on projects that are now redundant.”


I’M STILL LOOKING AT YOU!

I would think, given Spencer’s quote that many people who were let go were most likely working on some of the TV  and media functionality of the Xbox One, as it appears that Spencer wants to focus on games as a priority, much like Sony is doing with the PS4. This is just pure speculation on my part, but it seems logical. Then again, as someone who was a drone at various large companies, logic is not something that you encounter very often when executives are making decisions.

In a recent internal interview with Xbox mouthpiece Larry Hyrb (aka Major Nelson), Spencer, quite refreshingly states that “I learn a lot from listening to feedback, reading ideas. The two-way dialogue will be important as we drive this product forward, I think it will be a foundational element.”

Well as a long time gamer and an Xbox fan, allow me to reiterate a concern that we core gamers have with where the brand is going, and offer some advice. Stop sucking, concentrate on games and stop talking about TV for fucks sake.

I reckon that we will have to wait until E3 to see what direction the brand is really going. Even then, with E3 just around the corner, there may not be enough time for Spencer to make an impact yet, but it is possible. If he walks out onto the stage, and the first things that comes out of his mouth is TV, and media functionality, well folks, come meet the new boss, same as the old boss.
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Don’t you love “where are they now shows?” Nothing makes us feel better about ourselves than watching someone that had it all and pissed it all away. Child actors, teen popstars, mega athletes, you name it. Humans love to see our heroes fail and sink into obscurity as much as we root for them to succeed because we’re horrible.

The other day, I was perusing my local Gamestop, because I was feeling particular good about myself and needed to knock myself down to reality. As I looked through the walls upon walls of used games stacked up like cord wood, I began to reminisce of high profile games that had initially wowed us, but are now relegated to the junk pile. One can already get an idea of what next-gen launch titles will soon be tossed aside once developers get a grasp of what this new crop of hardware is capable of.

I began to look back at the launch games of yesteryear and came up with a personal list of games that I’d like to share. These are titles that were propped up and pimped out when consoles were first launched, but quickly fell into obscurity as better, more impressive games were released.

I’m open to hear what titles you feel should be included. Go ahead and share in the comments section. We’ll start with the 8-bit era and work our way up to current-generation.

NES: Hogan’s Alley



The eighties were an interesting time. Videogames were trying to rebound after the crash instigated by shoddy quality and over saturation of the market. Nintendo was in a unique position to corner the market, and as we all know, they did.

Everyone remembers Super Mario Bros. and Duck Hunt, but there was another title that I clearly remember being part of the launch line-up and that was Hogan’s Alley.

Lightgun shooters must have been in the Marketer’s Handbook for console launches back then, because every system had them. I didn’t recall caring for them that much. It was a novelty as far as I’m concerned, exciting at first, but limited in appeal. There was already Duck Hunt which was packed in with many NES units, why would anyone need another light gun shooter?

I would give a description of the game, but I never played it. I didn’t know anyone that even owned it, yet the game was everywhere. I saw it advertised in commercials, it had screenshots on NES console packaging, and displayed in stores, etc…

As a child of the eighties, I initially thought that Hogan’s Alley had something to do with Hulk Hogan, the wrestler, because I was a kid and kids are idiots. Actually, now that I think about, a light gun shooter with Hulk Hogan would be sweet.

Sega Master System: Alex Kidd in Miracle World



I was a huge Sega fan. My first console was an SMS even though all my friends had NESs. The SMS was a fine console with some great arcade ports, but what it didn’t have was a mascot that could hold a candle to Nintendo’s Mario. Alex Kidd was Sega’s attempt to create that mascot, which in my humble opinion was not a success.

I really wanted to like Alex Kidd in Miracle World, but he was just so lame. I recall showing the game to friends who immediately called it a Mario knockoff and they were right. Like all knockoffs, they always lack the same quality and polish of whatever they are trying to emulate. Alex Kidd was no exception.

Sega Genesis: Last Battle



In 1989 when the Sega Genesis was released in the states, years of Sega devotion finally paid off for me. Sega released a new powerful console and I managed to talk my parents into getting me one for Christmas because I was a spoiled little shit. All my friends who had NESs were in awe of it, and that is what childhood is all about, making your friends jealous.

The Genesis launched with a fairly decent library of games. Altered Beast was the pack-in, Space Harrier, and Ghouls ’N Ghost were among the launch titles that I owned. Last Battle was also among the launch titles that I recall seeing in Toys ‘R Us, magazines, and advertised on the Genesis box, but I had no desire to get it.

For years I wondered if the title was any good, given that it was one of the launch games that I never played. It looked impressive for the time, with large sprites and branching paths, but I don’t recall any friends that owned it. Years later, I downloaded the ROM and realized that I hadn’t missed a thing. It was an uninspired brawler, much like Altered Beast, but far less memorable.

Turbo Graphics 16: Keith Courage in Alpha Zones



The TG-16 holds a special place in my heart. My good friend owned one and he’s the only person I knew who had one. The games were so unique compared to what came out for the Genesis and SNES. The TG-16 had a few gems, Keith Courage was not one of them.

Keith Courage was the pack-in for the TG-16 for a short while, before it was replaced with the far superior Bonk’s Adventure. I remember seeing the game being played on a video loop at the local Babbages store and the game looked incredibly cool. The video showed you playing in this little mechanized suit fighting monsters with guns for heads. What’s not to like?

It wasn’t until I played the game for the first time at my friend’s house and realized that was only one half of the game. The other half, you played as a little kid in a Japanese village who killed cats that fell from the sky for some reason. It wasn’t a bad game by any means, just incredibly average. I also couldn’t help feeling a bit slighted that NEC was showcasing the far cooler looking mecha suit sections of the game in its advertising.

Super Nintendo: Pilotwings



This entry may very well cause a shit storm in the comments. I’m not saying that Pilotwings was a bad title. It could have very well been one of the better launch titles, had it not released alongside Super Mario World.

Everyone of my friends who had a SNES owned Pilotwings. It would be played for 15-minutes, a few skydives before we would say, “Enough of this shit, why aren’t we playing Mario! There is a fucking dinosaur we can ride!” and that would be the end of Pilotwings.

Sega Saturn: Clockwork Knight



The Sega Saturn did not have what many would call a smooth launch. Sega managed to release the console early, to the surprise of gamers everywhere, and also to their retail partners, who were pissed.

The Saturn did have Daytona, Virtua Fighter, and Panzer Dragoon, but they still needed to have an action platformer, so we got Clockwork Knight.

Clockwork Knight, like all previous titles mentioned was advertised on TV with snippets of other titles as well as having a call-out on the Saturn’s packaging. I owned this title and hated it. I plowed through it and traded it in to Funcoland (Remember them?!?).

Sony Playstation 1: Battle Arena Toshinden



The Playstation launched with a pretty decent library. It put the Saturn to shame. Not only did the games look better, but the console was cheaper. One of the games that I clearly remembered looking better than anything out there at the time was Battle Arena Toshinden.

I played this title to death. It blew away Virtua Fighter and Tekken graphically and was weapons based, which was a nice little twist. The gameplay was shallow however, and nowhere near as technical as Virtua Fighter or Tekken. It was good for showing off what the new PS1 was capable of and not much else.

Nintendo 64: Pilotwings 64



Pilotwings can’t catch a break. When the N64 launched in the U.S. you had your choice between two titles, Mario 64 and Pilotwings 64. Nothing wrong with Pilotwings 64, but who has time to play that game when you can play Mario in 3D for the first time.

Atari Jaguar: HAHAHAHAHAHA!


Stock photo of Atari Jaguar with CD-ROM attachment.

Sorry, but the only thing I recall being any good on the Atari Jaguar at launch was Tempest and I don’t even think it was a launch title. Everything else was crap.

Sega Dreamcast: Blue Stinger



The Sega Dreamcast had a pretty solid launch launch lineup. Memorable games included Sonic Adventure, NFL2K, Soulcalibur, Ready 2 Rumble, and Power Stone among others.

Blue Stinger was one of those titles that looked pretty cool and the reviews for it were decent. It was an action shooter with a good dash of survival horror. Having played it a handful of times, it was a decent title, but falls into the same trap of many other launch titles on this list. It’s a passable game, but there are games that launched along with it that are simply more impressive.

Sony Playstation 2: FantaVision



The Playstation 2 had one of the most amazing launches I’ve ever seen. It had the right mix of powerful hardware and big time software, as well as a DVD player. The media got onboard and the PS2 became a phenomenon.

The PS2 was an impressive piece of hardware which begged to be shown off to friends and family. That must have been the inspiration of FantaVision. For all intents and purposes, it was a tech demo disguised as a puzzle game.

It also had nothing to do with Fanta, the delicious orange soda. SO ZESTY AND REFRESHING!



I remember going to my local Gamestop to pick up my PS2 where they pushed me and everyone else there picking up a PS2 to buy it as an add-on. I did not see one person bite, nor did I meet anyone who owned the game.

Nintendo Gamecube:  Wave Race: Blue Storm



Wave Race 64, when launched for the N64, was met with much welcome. Saying that the N64 had a small library of launch titles would be an understatement. Wave Race 64, which came out after the N64 hardware was released, also showed off what the N64 was capable of technically. The wave physics were remarkable. I used to crank them up to the max in the options and tear it up on the courses. It was a lot of fun.

Wave Race: Blue Storm tried to build off on that success and nostalgia. It wasn’t a bad game by any means. Graphically, it was also impressive, but gameplay wise, I felt that not a lot has changed between it and its predecessor. Unfortunate really, as this could have been something that had legs for Nintendo. I imagined this title being very much like SSX, where it would evolve and become more outrageous over time. Unfortunately, that wasn’t the case.

Xbox: Blood Wake



Even though not technically a launch title, Blood Wake was released within 30 days of the Xbox hardware release. Microsoft even had put out a TV and print ad campaign to the support the title. It was up there with Halo, Dead or Alive 3, and Project Gotham Racing as a must have launch title.

I have fond memories of this game and have no idea why a sequel was never made. Some initial research shows that the game sold fairly well. It was also one of the first titles to be re-released as an Xbox Platinum Hit.

Much like wave Wave Race, there must be something about water based games, because it was technically impressive. It really showed off what the Xbox was capable of.

Xbox 360: Peter Jackson’s King Kong: The Official Game of the Movie



Movie tie-ins are never a good idea, but King Kong had a few things going for it. Peter Jackson was closely aligned with the project along with Ubisoft’s Michel Ancel. Graphically, the game was amazing and really showed off what the Xbox 360 was capable of. Incidentally, it was also one of the first games plagued by the growing pains associated with the game industry’s switch from SD to HD. The game was pretty much unplayable on SD TVs without being patched, which was later released by Ubisoft.

King Kong falls neatly into a recurring theme for a lot of launch titles. It was graphically impressive, but gameplay wise, it was shallow.

Playstation 3: Genji: Days of the Blade



Giant Enemy Crab meme aside, this game really was a graphical showcase and not much else. Perusing the reviews for this title, they pretty much all praised it for being an eye candy powerhouse while having an uncontrollable camera which had a tendency to disorient the player.

Nintendo Wii: Red Steel



There was plenty of fanfare with this title leading up to the Wii’s launch. The writing was already on the wall that the Wii was going to be more family friendly. Red Steel was meant to appeal to a very niche group of core fans excited for the Wii.

Red Steel was one of the few Wii launch titles that took advantage of the remote and nunchuck combo and it showed. Reviews of the title are pretty aligned on the fact that the controls are glitchy at times and on occasion unintuitive. The title did have an amazing soundtrack which I was quite fond of.

Despite mixed reviews, the game sold well, enough for a sequel released four years later.

Nintendo Wii U: ZombiU



Time to look into the crystal ball and predict what games will become future obscure launch titles.

Riding on the wave of zombi mania, ZombiU got a good amount of exposure leading up to the Wii U launch. Much like Red Steel for the Wii, ZombiU was a showcase for Nintendo’s new control device, the Wii U gamepad.

The game got mixed, to generally positive reviews. Rumors circulated that a sequel was in the works, but Ubisoft squashed that idea when it announced that the game was not profitable and there are no plans for a sequel.

Xbox One: Ryse: Son of Rome



This was a toss up between Ryse: Son of Rome and Killer Instinct.  I settled on Ryse because it fits so many past examples of launch titles that eventually disappeared into obscurity. It’s a graphical powerhouse that shows off what the Xbox One is capable of, but has shallow, even rudimentary gameplay that has been done better on older titles like God of War.

Playstation 4: Knack



Knack has a lot going for it. It has pedigree given that Mark Cerny was the title’s director and like Ryse: Son of Rome, it’s a technical showcase for the Playstation 4.

Cerny described the game as “a little bit like Crash Bandicoot and Katamari Damacy, with a touch of God of War.” Translation, we’re not reinventing the wheel.

Conclusion:

Hardware launches are great. Gamers get excited because it’s a new beginning. Hardware launches are also predictable in that the  launch games are many times just glimpses of what the new hardware will be capable of doing. The constant theme here is that many of them are graphically impressive for their time, but are showing nothing revolutionary gameplay wise.

I hope you enjoyed this list. Let me know what games you think deserve to be mentioned in the comments section.
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First off, I don’t condone the misuse of controlled substances. One should only use prescription drugs under the supervision of a doctor, unless that doctor is named Dr. Feelgood, in which case, you’re not taking a prescription medicine, but rather smoking crack.

I was recently prescribed the pain killer Codeine, which is technically an opiate. How I came about acquiring said substance is a tale in upon itself. You see, I’m 6’4” tall, and when you are slightly above average height, you have slightly larger than average feet which can and will smash into things.  One day, at the office, about a year ago, I was walking through the warehouse reading some e-mails on my phone. In the walking path, a “hardhat” left a pallet of product ever so slightly in the walking path. Not paying attention, and also under the belief that a pallet would not be in the walking path, I kicked the wooded structure with such force that for an instant, I contemplated hurling my phone across the warehouse, where it would hopefully hit the worker who left it there in his big stupid face. I was able to constrain myself and would have made my old football coach proud, by walking off the pain.


Broken Leg? Walk it off pussy.

A few days later, my toe was still sore, and I also noticed the faintest white line in the nail, which I believed to most likely be a crack. That white line slowly got bigger every week, until it covered my entire toe. Friends, it was time to visit the local podiatrist.

At the podiatrist, I was informed that I was suffering from a disgusting toenail fungus. Apparently, one way to get a toenail fungus is by banging your foot into something really hard. The nail separates from the nail bed for an instant, and that is all it takes for the fungus to set in.

The doctor prescribed me first creams, which after six months did nothing. Then it was time to try oral medications, which seemed to work at first, but the fungus quickly recovered. Apparently, your nail bed is like the Ritz Carlton for fungus. They have a well stocked mini-fridge, complimentary bath robe, mint on the pillow, and Egyptian cotton sheets on a luxurious California king-sized bed. The fungus checks-in and doesn’t want to check out. At this point the only thing you can do is an “extraction,” which is fancy doctor talk for ripping out the toe nail like your an American POW in a North Vietnamese prison camp.


ANESTHESIA HASN'T KICKED IN YET!

Did I mention my podiatrist is actually Vietnamese? I knew at the point I was in good hands. Her grandfather probably had the honor of ripping Senator John McCain’s toenails out. She had a toenail ripping pedigree running through her veins for sure.

After getting a bunch of local anesthesia shot into my toe, the doctor commenced with the procedure. She first used a thin metal tool to dig underneath my toe and separate it from the nail bed. She then used what look like pliers to peel/rip the nail off my big toe. I asked if she would pretend to interrogate me while she was doing the procedure to make it feel more authentic. “WHERE IS YOUR BASE!?! WHAT ARE YOUR ORDERS?!? “WHO IS YOUR COMMANDING OFFICER?!? YOU ANSWER NOW FILTHY AMERICAN OR I RIP OUT NAIL!!! My wife who was there giving me some moral support thought that asking the good doctor to role play would be highly inappropriate.


She did let me keep the nail as a souvenir. Thanks?

When she was finally done, she gave me instructions on how to care for the wound and a prescription for Codeine. At first, I totally thought I was not going to need a painkiller as I didn’t feel anything, but less than an hour later, the local anesthetic began to wear off. As my toe began to throb and burn, I begged my wife to run to the CVS and fill the prescription ASAP. I needed that sweet Codeine urgently, like a crack whore begging a pimp for some of the rock.

Thank god the meds worked quickly. The pain subsided and I was able to calm down and relax. I was also feeling pretty good about myself. I WAS CHASING THE DRAGON BABY! Well, it was actually more like a small lizard, or a newt, but I was still feeling the effects of opiates, for what it’s worth.

The day went on as planned. I followed doctor’s orders and tried to take it easy, laid up, on the couch, foot elevated. Had a good lunch, took a nap, had dinner, watched a show with my daughter. Things were good.

I hate to say it, but having a procedure like this is heaven for fathers. You have an excuse to be a lazy shit. Can’t chase the kid, can’t make dinner, can’t clean up. It’s heaven really, and the wife can’t do anything about it. So my toe feels like someone smashed it with the blunt end of an ax, it was all worth it.

Like clockwork after eight hours, the toe began throbbing again. Time for a second dose. The wife and daughter were already fast asleep. There was really only one thing to do, pop in a game and play while chasing the dragon.


How I pictured my game room.

First choice was Tomb Raider: Not as Definitive as the PS4 Edition, but without fast pace action, I feared that I would quickly fall asleep. Maybe Battlefield 4, I thought, but there was a very good chance the hamsters that power the EA servers were on strike night. I would probably fall asleep waiting for a round to start. Dead Rising 3 was a distinct possibility, but I’d probably have horrible nightmares, made more vivid due to the medication. I settled on Call of Duty: Ghosts.

The first thing I noticed after booting up the game and waiting for a round to start was how calm I was. I’m a competitive guy, played sports in high school and college, and before starting a multiplayer game, I had the same feeling before an actual sporting contest, even though substantially muted. My heartbeat would be slightly elevated, maybe a dash of anxiety for the game to actually start. The medication however made me eerily calm. I was like a stoic samurai, taking a shot of saki before battle, calm, collected, ready for death…. Shit I’m falling asleep, I need to focus.

I’m a middling Call of Duty player. I never lead my team in kills, but I’m rarely at the bottom. I comfortably middle of the road. Under the effects of my meds, however, I noticed that my play style was very different. I wasn’t sprinting through the maps like my normal self. I was being cautious, moving from point to point. For once, it was I getting behind the enemy, double tapping him in the back of the head. I wasn’t raking up as many kills as I normally do, but I was certainly not dying anywhere near as often as I normally do.

As time went on however, my kill to death ratio started to even out. Then, the deaths started to over take the kills. Before I knew it, I was getting only a handful of kills. Everything was a blur and I was a sitting duck. My reaction time was non existent. It was time to call it a night.

The lesson learned? Opiates will help you, but only at the very beginning. Once the drug takes hold of you, you might as well give up, because you have no chance. It was fun while it lasted, but in no way do I recommend any type of competitive multiplayer while using opiates. Don’t operate any heavy machinery either.

All kidding aside, this article should be taken as completely tongue-in-cheek. Drug abuse is serious stuff. I don’t condone it and have known people who have suffered from it greatly. Joking about it is a way for me to cope with it. With that said, I hope you had a good laugh at my sacrifice. Now I must go and change my bandages.
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Anders Breivik, the Norwegian mass murderer convicted for killing 77 people is threatening a hunger strike if he’s not given a Playstation 3 among other creature comforts. Apparently, he believes his current Playstation 2 is too juvenile and is cruel and unusual.

My first thought when I heard this was “Tough! You play PS2 and you’ll like it or starve motherfucker!” The balls this guy has to demand a new console after causing so much pain. At least he retrained himself a bit by not demanding a shiny new PS4.

It’s surprising to me that this turd, this monster, who killed 77 people has access to anything that can provide him with any type of enjoyment or the ability to pass the time. It reminds me when I was a kid and my parents punished me by sending me to my room. In my room, I had a TV, videogames, stereo, books, etc… It was fucking paradise. If they really wanted to punish me, they should’ve sent me anywhere but my room.

Anders, who fancies himself as a right-wing extremist has gone a bit soft it appears. In a letter he wrote to authorities, he says “…Other inmates have access to adult games while I only have the right to play less interesting kids game… One example is 'Rayman Revolution,' a game aimed at 3-year-olds.”

Why Anders, I thought you were a militant, but evidently, you are just a giant fat pussy, with a chin beard.


Image search for Big Fat Pussy were very inappropriate, even for my standards. Here's an image of the world's fattest cat instead.

It get’s better though. Breivik needs extra amenities to accompany a PS3. He continues in the letter that he needs his $49 allowance doubled and demands a more comfortable chair.

Breivik closes out his letter of demands with this, “You've put me in hell … and I won't manage to survive that long. You are killing me. If I die, all of Europe's right-wing extremists will know exactly who it was that tortured me to death."


Here's Breivik's hell. What? No mint on pillow? Fuck this I'm writing Amnesty International.

Norway has what many would call a “progressive” system of incarceration. Inmates live in what apparently look like well appointed dorm rooms, with plenty of amenities. It’s not like Breivik has to worry about dropping the soap in the communal shower and getter buggered by an inmate called “Ripper”. No one is going to shank Anders with a filed down toothbrush in the cafeteria. I’d say he should thank his lucky stars that he’s incarcerated in Norway and not somewhere else with more “conservative” views of punishment.

That is what is most ironic with this situation in my opinion. Regardless of your political affiliations, I find it quite funny that Breivik, who massacred so many people in the name of right-wing fanaticism is now trying to game a very liberal and progressive system. You can’t have it both ways pal.


Nice "chin strap" beard. What's the matter? Your mustache grows in too thin for normal facial hair? Also, nice eyebrows freak.

Anders Breivik, I hope that the authorities deny everything you requested. As far as I’m concerned, you have it too good already. As a parent, what you did to those people and especially those children is my worst nightmare come true.

As a gamer, I find it reprehensible that you considered yourself a fan of my beloved medium and allowed the media to paint gamers, once again, as a threat to society. You’re a sick twisted person, who should have been treated for your obvious mental illness before you became a societal threat. I pray that when your 21-year sentence is complete, the Norwegian authorities rightfully put you right back in indefinitely. You can spend the rest of your days playing video games, from your comfy chair, while everyone else moves on and forgets you.

Good riddance.

You can read more about Anders Breivik's letter of demands here.
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They say the grass is greener on the other side. I hate that saying, people who say that deserve to get punched in the throat, and yet it’s what I keep telling myself when I think of the PS4. It’s not that I feel that I made a major mistake when it comes to buying and Xbox One. It’s just that I maybe should have given it some more thought before I plunked down my cash.


"The grass is always greener on the HIIIIIIYAAAAAAAAA!"

Making the decision to buy an Xbox One first was really a no brainer. I was an avid Xbox 360 fan, even though I owned a PS3 as well. All my friends had Xbox 360s and the vast majority of them were going to make the leap to the Xbox One. I’m also a fan of Xbox exclusives and the Xbox Live service, where even though you pay a premium, you get a certain amount of stability and quality from that paid premium service, which I always found lacking from PSN.

I may be simply trying to justify my investment, but I still feel that the Xbox One was a sound purchase, for someone like myself who is looking for the best of both worlds at least. For all intents and purposes, the Xbox One had the better launch lineup, if only slightly. Forza Motorsport, Dead Rising 3, and yes, even Ryse are good exclusives for a launch and of course there were some solid third-party multi-platform offerings like Call of Duty: Ghosts and Battlefield 4 (BF4 is a turd regardless on what system you play it BTW). Quite simply, the Xbox One had the slight edge in my opinion in terms launch.

There is something about the prospects of the PS4 that are hard to ignore, however. There were some very early developments that showed that the PS4 hard a certain edge. The French call it a je ne sais quoi, which I believe means having coitus with a mime.


We're about to get freaky.

I never gave much notice to the specs, which stated that the PS4 had an edge, what I care about are the games and it’s quite evident that the PS4 has the architecture to create slightly better games. When you’re a core gamer, slightly better is night and day as far as I’m concerned.

First there was the news that Call of Duty: Ghosts would output at 1080p on the PS4 and 720p on the Xbox One. No big deal right? What’s one game? Of course, more comparisons of cross-platform games came out. Pretty much all multi-platform games on the PS4 looked slightly better than they did on the Xbox One. A testament on how easy it is to develop and port to the PS4, compared to the Xbox One.

Then of course, you have Tomb Raider: Definitive Edition, which quite frankly, is more definitive on the PS4 than it is on the Xbox One. There really is no reason why these games shouldn’t be practically identical for all intents and purposes if Microsoft continues to claim that the difference in specs between the Xbox One and PS4 is negligible.



It’s pretty apparent that there has been a clear role reversal between Microsoft and Sony in terms of how I personally plan to utilize their respective consoles.

I’ve been a two console owner for a long time. I had a Sega Saturn and PS1, where my Saturn was played for first-party exclusives and my PS1 for everything else. I think I had an N64 during this time as well solely for Zelda and Mario etc… Same thing for the Dreamcast and PS2. Then I switched over to the Xbox as my lead console and PS2 for exclusives. My Xbox 360 was my lead console for multi-platform games and exclusives, while my PS3 was relegated to just playing Sony exclusives and watching Blu-ray. There’s has been a very clear method to my madness.

What is becoming very clear this time around is that my Xbox One is going to be taking a secondary role to a future PS4 purchase. Don’t get me wrong, the Xbox One is a great console which will have some great exclusives like Forza, Halo, Titanfall, Gears of War, etc… and those exclusives are going to be amazing for sure, but it’s clear that in terms of multi-platform games, it’s going to be the PS4 all the way. The PS4 is going to be the workhorse, at least in my household. The Xbox brand had a good run, but Playstation has caught up. There are no iron clad allegiances for core this core gamer. I care for the best possible experience, and it appears that the PS4 can provide that.
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