Snaileb 's Profile - Destructoid

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So I know I haven't exactly been a very hands on member, mainly because my hands have been on my Xbox controller for the past EVER. My junk is very jealous of my right hand lately. I've been having A LOT of fun with Fallout3, Lego Batman, Gears 2, Soul Calibur 4, and Left 4 Dead. I seriously suggest Lego Batman for couples.

I've been using my new room mates PC for the past couple days to talk to some people online, and I do really miss you guys. 'cept Tazar. You mo. I'll be getting back on more and more after this weekend, when I finally pick up the power cord for my crapped out PC.

Finally I do need two favors from the community. I need a link to the NARP in Miami, hopefully I can get in touch with Kryptinite. Also if anyone knows caffienepowered's email that'd be grand. Send it to ( snaileb at gmail ), and not in the comments! :P Thanks.

In the meantime thanks for all the well wishes, and I've been playing a lot of Gears 2 and L4D. If anyone want's to hop on sometime, my Gamertag : Snaileb

Thanks for listening CHHHIIILLLDREEEN this is THREE SNAIL (OOOOOWWWW)...

OK, sorry, no more Fallout3 for a bit.

For all the people that aren't hitting the jump to read my review, here's the short and skinny : It's retarded, please rent it.

Now for the more complex piece of this here blog.

I really REALLY wanted to like the movie. From the epic scenery and lush CGI effects, to the awesome crossover of Jet Li and Jackie Chan. Intresting note, they both played two seperate characters each, and the opening credits didn't put one above the other, instead it was displayed like so :

Jackie Chan

OK so that was corny. First red flag. Anyways.. I'm not much of a review for movies, and I don't do this too often, but I thought it should be known. The amount of money, time, script, and planning on this was wasted. Don't get me wrong, this would be a fantastic movie to take the kids to, but the "Karate Kid time traveler" plot was uncalled for, and the Monkey King character was ridiculously Saturday Morning Cartoonish. Remember, for the kids...

The fight sequences, the good stuff. OR so I thought. Most of the fighting in the beginning is Jackie Chan doin his drunken master thing. Fun stuff, loved every bit. Then we get to the kid and his training montage complete with cheezy backdrop music. The only fight worth seeing was Jackie and Li duking it out, but even then it was one fight, and too short to care. The rest from there on out are all wires and CGI. It was terrible.

For the Kung Fu enthusiast, you'll appreciate alot of the culture and fighting styles used, but you'll curse them for using CGI and wires. It's not even entirely a feel good movie, or a kung fu hussle, so I don't understand why this even had to been made apart from the crossover.

There's not much I can say without ruining the movie with spoilers, so just let it be know if you're going to take your kid to see this : Great. 3 out of 5 stars, and you'll probably enjoy taking him to see this than Kung fu Panda or whatever the hell is out now. If you're trying to see this to see some sort of action flick, I wouldn't waste my breath, or cash.

2 out of 5 Stars. Why stars anyways? Can I use Snails?

Come on in, the atmosphere is dank with nerd joy.

Alot of stuff has been happening this year, mainly to bring the best games on time for Summer. I know there's been alot of impressions, rants, and previews, and this could certainly fit well in the forums, but I have alot to say.

Games I'm playing

First off : TOO MANY GAMES! Currently for the Xbox 360, I gamefly'ed The Club and Rainbow Six Vegas 2 (sweeeeet) with Lost Oddesy and Resident Evil : UC coming to the house. I'm still trying for that seriously achievement (2000 kills away) to prep myself for Gears 2. Ikaruga has been kicking my ass on repeat, and for those who haven't picked it up or figured it out : Dark Sector blew. Oh and the new COD4 maps are phenomenal. When the crap will Killhouse be used to gain XP? (COD4 blog coming, I swears.)

On the Wii, I've been having a blast. I downloaded Link to the Past and Super Metroid. I play these alot when I'm not on Brawl, and today you need to download River City Ransom. We can hop on XBL, play at the same time and pretend we're online with each other.. and stuff..

And finally, I purchased a DS. I mainly bought it for the woman, and got her Prof Layton and Pokemon Diamond. Except.. I picked up pokemon, and I'm straight hooked. 107 pokemon with 7 badges in 40 hours. I tend to play inbetween deaths in Gears.. yeah now my fiancee hates me. I just have to buy a seperate DS I guess..

Games I want to play


That is all I can think of. From the co-op to the deathmatch, and even some healthy competition for our competing brands of gaming goodness : Sony and Microsoft. There's enough hooker slapping for everyone, please don't be like Wardrox.

Also, Mortal Kombat vs DC. To the haters, I say let go of the past. All the people that don't care for this game seem to be MK fans, and all the people who busted a nut want to finally have a Batman vs Superman game. I'm the latter, and I simply cannot understand all the negativity. For more on this, see Butmac. He sums it up in a way I could never replicate.

The Iron Man demo! YESSSS oh lord I had a blast. In fact, I played it four times just to master the flight controls and jet through the level as a certified badass. It seems more like a Mech game, maybe some Armored Core 4. The weapons were pretty simple and only a few were present, so hopefully the upgrades will provide some more diversity. Let's just hope it drops in price soon, hmm?

Games that shouldn't be played

I've been playing ALOT of Dreamcast too. Marvel VS Capcom 2 seems to be the only other fighting game I excel at besides Smash, even though I know I'm probably poop. Well there's alot of other games on the DC that other people suggested to me, and here I'll label some that you should stay very far away from.

Ooga Booga
Powerstone 2
Neo Geometix
Heavy Metal (Soundtrack is epic.. but.. a it's heavy metal game)
Psychic Force 2012 (so cheesy it should be good.. but it's not)
Dynamite Cop (Did you know if you use a light gun on an HD tv it doesn't work?)

All in all, it's been an eventful week away from the internet and into my gaming room. I don't have much else to say.. what are you guys mashing your thumbs to this week?

Hey guys! Bet you didn't expect to see one of these anytime soon eh? Yeah well I admit I haven't been keeping things in the spotlight, but I wouldn't want to ruin the movie on it's big day. Besides, I've seen alot of movie blogs here and enjoy reading all of them. Well you didn't come to hear me blog about blogs. On with the goods! First..

The Hulk is getting saucy. Apparently there's a Iron Man and Hulk crossover, but only in the Hulk movie. YES I know I posted this before (back in Janurary. Ohhhh I'm good), but back then it was only a rumor for the new Avengers film. Now it's been confirmed! From the article :

They also confirmed that Robert Downey Jr.'s Tony Stark will appear in the movie and they showed a clip of Downey Jr. walking into a seedy bar and meeting General Thunderbolt Ross (William Hurt) to talk about his "problem."

Now admittingly, I have never picked up The Spirit, but you guys know me. I'm a comic fanatic! So anyways, I guess I should pick it up. Besides, anything Frank Miller does makes me remember why I have a penis. His manly, over-the-top action titles such as Sin City, 300, and not to mention his awesome comic book style definitely makes me want to stab stuff with my penis. Is there anything more manly? Here's the poster and clip.

Last, the final Joker pics! Surprisingly these are actually old pictures. They were leaked on April 7th, but were quickly taken down the same day! Luckily your buddy Snail has taken the liberty of not deleting all his old junk on the ol photobucket account.

You've been servered Destructoid! Which movie are you anticipating?

PS - Many more Snaileb blogs today. Sorry I haven't been around, but I has no PC, and am blocked from Dtoid at work.

Cry me a river.

You can just hear all the nerds rushing to create a new post...

Space Captain, entertainer, Price-line negotiator, and now video games salesman can be added to that resume.


Cutest cat ever.

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