Hello, my robot brethren!

I'm Joseph, though most of my friends just call me Joe. I'm an 18 year old unemployed gamer hailing from the glorious mass of floating land that is Great Britain -- which of course means that, yes, I only drink tea, have dreadful dental hygiene, regularly ride around on penny-farthing's to the tune of Benny Hill and personally know the Queen (well, three out of four isn't bad). I'm also an ex-student, having decided to take a year out before University to pursuit a career in life. Thanks to the whole unemployment thing though, all that pursuit really means right now is that I just sit around all day playing video games and watching TV.

I'm also an aspiring writer, hence my impeccable grammar and delightful vocabulary. I say 'aspiring', but as we've already established, all I really do is sit around all day playing video games and watching TV.

I do love to write though, even despite my perfectionist mind demanding I spend hours meticulously correcting and rewording every sentence until it deems it acceptable. I even have somewhat of a tendency to make-up words to help better fit my point, and can be known to occasionally (read; frequently) use specific English idioms in my writing, such as 'chaps', 'jolly good' and 'what took you so goddamn long in World War II'.

Still, my main passion in life would have to be gaming, which I've honestly been doing since before I can remember. Me and my brother were brought up with a Sega Mega Drive (or Genesis to those outside Europe), but over the years we've owned everything from Game Gear's to Xbox's. Even so, we've only ever properly gamed together over football games, which he's infuriatingly always remained better than me at (two and a half years extra on this Earth is clearly cheating!).

As for current consoles, I personally own both an Xbox 360 and PS3, the latter of which I recently won in a competition I don't even remember entering. I really only use it for exclusives though; I'm far too attached to my achievements to just give them up now. I actually think I've still got my old N64 knocking around somewhere too, which I might have to dig out soon for some wondrous nostalgia.



I don't actually have a favourite game, mainly in the sense that I've never actually being able to narrow it down to a single title. One minute it'll be Grim Fandango, the next Final Fantasy X. And then when I've convinced myself that it is FFX, I'll remember all the unbridled joy I had playing Mass Effect and be right back at square one. Honestly, I doubt I could even manage a top ten.

And now, because I'm sure you're all interested (and totally not because I've run out of things to say), here're some random facts about me; my all-time favourite movie is Gladiator (excluding V for Vendetta, Phone Booth and Garden State). I'm horribly afraid of spiders. My favourite/lucky number is twenty-two. I regularly attempt to drink copious amounts of alcohol even though I shouldn't. I love the word 'copious' and wish I had the opportunity to use it more often. I possess an unhealthy addiction to Wikipedia. I hate text language (srsly m8). I finished at the top of my class in college. I've a habit of rambling on incoherently when nervous or uncomfortable. I pretend to text to defuse awkward situations. I secretly wish I could play the guitar. And I like long walks on the beach, candle-lit dinners and literary clichés.

Apparently I also like saying 'I' a lot.

That about wraps it up for now. Hopefully I'll start blogging properly over the next few days/weeks/months (I have an idea for the Fear theme which I'm itching to write about). I'll even try and drop a post or two over at the forums sometime, too. So, what I guess I'm trying to say in a really long-winded-kind-of-way is -- hi, Destructoid. It's nice to meet you.

Now, must dash; I've luncheon with Elizabeth at noon. Toodles!