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When you get as old as me, your hardcoreness
comes at the expense of a pill...



Who's pants are these?
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I want to buy my wife a DS for christmas...

Ok, I want to buy a DS for christmas, give it to my wife, and have it around to play with more to the point, but my wife, ever the pragmatic, wants to know "what else does it do?"... Can I sync outlook? Can I keep appointments? What else does this little black folder do that makes it worth the time to me? (she can be such a extravagant, wallet crunching purchase buzz kill)

So here's the thing... Nintendo's site is kinda sparse for a lot of information, seeming more interested in getting you shuffled over to the store (which keeps hickuping for me on my wii jacket orders, more on that later) than giving you any solid information on what else it's capable of.

So here's your chance nintendo fanboys, tell me what's out there that would make a 30 / 40's professional interested in having one around? Please? I know I probably should purchase this or that instead, but that's not the question (plus, then I don't have the DS around, see the point)... so...

What gives?







SlavedHeart
12:39 PM on 10.10.2007

It's another of those quandaries that hits you at 3am, while surfing the fridge for that last piece of KFC, thinking about DLC, and wondering....

Why isn't the big 10/10 Sony announcement (you know, the one that isn't happening) that Valve and Sony are putting steam on the PSN? This seems as though it would have been yet another example of high power winnage for the sony crowd. We could have gotten the Orange Box as a surprise today (though I've checked, no dice) and danced around the fire of the 65nm motherboard flames. We could have hoisted SCEA on our shoulders and shouted "huzzah! we smote the chief!". Instead, we face a rumor induced announcement drought while the rest of the gaming world puts the sniper to the test on just HOW many can be in one map at one time, as well as exactly how fast CAN you accelerate through a portal at your head and feet.

This seems like it could have been a match made in heaven, but again, so does DLC for GTA IV, and the potential lack of it for Heavenly Sword (p.s., for HS2, multiplayer please...), how is it that we can persuade Sony to open up to PS3-ware... to give even smaller folks a chance at the black obelisk of lust. I'd love to go back to programming Flash, or even back as far as Director if given the chance were we given a emulator better than the web interface... sure a lot smut and crap might filter in (and it would have to be community monitored), but you would still have the opportunity to have some truly engaging content, made by people with a couple grand in pc toys, instead of a million dolor P&L statement. I think if this were the case, we would see much faster DLC available from the big boys, especially when lonlyboy326 put out the next game of the year, or stinky-stiches45 makes the next big puzzle addiction with just a little math and grid. Having these things would get the larger firms to direct more attention towards the DLC side of the equation, instead of following the same paradigm of the last 10 or so years, and just putting out a disk, and forgetting about it...

My proof to back up these wild claims? How many of the biggest games out there DON'T have an active Mod/Map community? Even the classics have fallen into disrepair with the advent of better and bigger add-on creation toys, yet the console generation, where the power and ability is now there, still seem resilient, as though they are going to have to give up part of the profits in order to have success, and there is nothing tighter than a business man and his purse strings.

Anyway, I'm sure this post isn't shaping up to be the convincing be all and end all that I would have liked it to be, but instead I'd like to feel that if we do ever see steam, or even just valve on the PSN, it's all by my doing...

your welcome....








I've been playing Warhawk for what... about 6 mos now it feels (beta)... Last week, I rented (and quickly returned, after performing a rite of exorcism over it in vein) Lair. I'm currently suing the rentals place for not warning me that this game might suck...

I think someone at GI said it best that a dragon that performs this badly would be relegated to tricks at the bar, and begging for scraps. What it DID have though, was a single player campaign, and a decent story line at that, as well as some innovative levels (that could have supplemented the.. umm.. 5... in warhawk), and some decent voice acting and scene creation. Mix in a healthy dose of fantasy and you round out an almost good experience. BUT, with the control scheme making me sometimes dash forward, sometimes u-turn, sometimes cough up a smurf, as well as a fighting system feeling like I'm only pressing two buttons to make things die, and a glitchy mission tracking system (there ARE NO MORE FREAKING TORROS ON THE BRIDGE you jackhole burner), this game suffers some of the most inexcusable breaks in a game system... heck, superman 64 was better than this in some spots... (ok, that was too far, I'm sorry).

Then I get into warhawk again, which I think has a wildly playable experience. Great structure, well balanced game play, and a lot of team work opportunities. But, when I don't want to play against anyone, and just get through a short play of something, I can never reach for Warhawk, because it requires too much time and attention. Instead, I've found myself playing "just another scene" in Stuntman Ignition (legendary 35 bitches...) and wondering why I never see any of my clan online... Why aren't these two one game, remove the mandatory sixaxis, replace the dragons with warhawks and nemesis... these would have been one GREAT game, better controlled, better (heck, any) solo length... lots of stuff... and I'd even go so far as to bet they would have doubled the sales attributed to BOTH these games.

Am I naive? Yup, you bet, I'm sure there are a lot of dissenters, who would say, no, each game needed to be it's own game... they each are unique... yeah, sure, they definitely are... but a combination would have made them original...










Though I am now over tired...
my thumb and fingers, all blazing fire,
HalfLife done, Doom's next on the pile
How I love to game.

Eyes tracked dots, from wall to wall...
Resistance found me slow to draw
Sniped in the head, but GG ya'all.
How I love to game.

THUG 1 THUG 2, THAW and Tape8
don't spend this much time when I masturbate
another line or another (oblivion) gate
How I love to game.

Time draws neigh, this is over dramatic
Though I was going to keep up at it.
Instead I'm going to load Warhawk, addict....
How I love to ......

Hell with this... I'm going to play...









Would it have crazy redhead kickass written all over it? Burned in through some cosmic, spiritual, tutorial level magic fire crap perhaps? Or would they pick one that looked more like Kai...

I picked up Heavenly Sword on Friday afternoon, about 4 pm... Blockbuster down the road gets their shipment in late because their delivery guy likes to hit on the girls at the coffee shop next door, even though they are in their teens and he is approaching Picard age... (nerd meets bald).

So, now it's Monday, and since I've played through the game about 2 or 3 (hundred) times on normal mode now, I though I would take a stab at my hell mode game again, and see if I could make it past the first chapter without crying like a little girl...

Ok, well, maybe it's not THAT bad, but it took me easily three hours to finish the first flying fox encounter on hell mode, when it went like butta on normal mode, first try. That all being said, I've got to return the game tomorrow, and I've got to work this afternoon... I wonder if I can actually make it through hell mode on one rental... that would be the TRUE mark of a short game. Mind you, it's TRULY BEAUTIFUL, with a rich and layered story that leaves room for several sequels, and is quite moving, even for a guy, but man, it's short like "Flock of Seagulls" fame short

{{Update}} Shortest -- Game -- Ever... finished Hell mode 1/2 hr before Blockbuster opened, took it back first thing, hoping to find Dirt, Lair, or perhaps Stuntman... No Dice... back, thankfully, to Warhawk.

All that being said, the whole reason I sat down to write (other than my clever use of adoption humor) is a stunning realization I had yesterday when I went down to Gamestop to grab a copy of the Ratchet and Clank demo...

The Orange box, the next game I'm SURE I'll purchase,comes out on November 13 (along with Assassin's Creed and several others), or at least that's the current listed date for the PS3 on IGN... but RockBand comes out on the 20th, which for a former touring drummer (as long as Touring qualifies as my home state, and the 3 or 4 surrounding it)... Well... see... it's kinda like having someone finally dedicate a video game to frog baseball. It's always sounded like a good idea, but no one ever did it just right... Usually it's just a sloppy mess of frog guts...

So... even though I'm the biggest halflife nerd going, and know the path through the first two of HL2, I've got Episode 2, Portal, and all of the online options (which includes TF2, I'm not forgetting it) to finish ALONG with completing the first path, and trying to hit all the lambada stashes... make a point of hitting all the accomplishment's or whatever sony is calling them...

THEN, I've got to get a IV drip started, so I can begin the orgy of Rock and Drugs and Groupies and SuperStardom (all of which deserve capitalizations in their own rights) or at least me playing through the entire drum career of the game just to learn the songs, before going on to trying them on hard or expert (the easy looks too easy to mess up if you are actually playing all the minor notes and such, but what do I know, I've not played it yet... )

My question today is this? What is the best saline brand to put myself on, and what month long illness should I be researching now in order to clear my calender for these two games? And what about everything leading up to that point? Simpsons, Blacksite, Tony Hawk, Haze, Skate, the fricking list goes on and on...

Where were these games when I was pining for a shooter or adventure while trying to stay out of the 110+ heat down here in Phoenix? Warhawk? Ok, but that's only 1... and the stats are STILL messed up... or were friday...








Ok, this will require some history, so I'll backup before I ever put the transmission into drive.

I've lived with, and have been married to my wife for over 10 years now. We've both got past's, ex's, I've raised her two sons as my own for that long, even to the point that people often mistake me for their biological father. I've been there... for a WHILE.

We all just found out the other day (both the boys live on their own now..) that my wife's ex-husband, the boys real father, died almost 6 days ago. He'd go so far as to disown his own sons because he didn't want the responsibility of taking care of them, even 1 or 2 days a month. He'd even dis-invited, in person, his youngest son from the annual family picnic. This guy is a jerk, control freak deadbeat, but he is the boys dad...

BUT WE HAD TO FIND OUT FROM THE NEWSPAPER, almost 2500 miles away. His obiturary even mentions the boys, but none of the aunts, uncles, cousins, or anyone contacted them. That's how deep the jerkism runs in his family....

Now, everyone is feeling complex emotions, he was the ultimate assholz dad, deadbeat, back almost 10 years on a simple 40$ a month child support (the minimum he could be charged because my wife couldn't bear to put any further burden on him..). We've had problems getting our own morgage because of his bad credit. He has made my life diffucult, but I don't want him to die, he's another human being, and all human life is equal...

BUT, someone then asked me, does that make my Wife a Widow? What? ? Don't I count?

Talk about uncomfortable.

P.S. You can try to defend him, maybe I have a bad perception, but before you do, know this, my wife has a picture of him passed out drunk, with his car parked on the front lawn, running, with his oldest son in the back in a car seat (he took him to the bar with him, instead of sticking around the house, while his wife was at the only job being held in the household at that time)... still think it just might be my perception?

P.P.S... this is catharsis, so please don't think to judge, I needed to tell someone annomous, and you guys are cheaper than a therapist for single issues...