Steamtoid Challenge: Week 1 - Destructoid

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Name's Ozz, I'm 25 and hail from Southern Ontario, Canada. Tetris broke my gaming cherry back in '89, thanks to Game Boy, and I've been obsessed with gaming since '98.
My favourite console would be the Nintendo 64, and favourite game is Legend of Zelda: Ocarina of Time. Aside from Zeldas, my favourite genre is First Person Shooters (Specifically old-school, DOOM, Duke Nukem 3D).
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I've decided to host a weekly challenge to fellow Steamtoid users (Even new ones!) and give out a prize to whoever does it better than everyone else (including Batman). The prize will be $5 worth of anything from Steam, and maybe extra goodies depending on what I have. If there's nothing the winner wants for $5, they can "Bank" it for later use, or if they win again and claim $10 worth of goodies, and so forth.

However! There are rules to be followed!
1) Must have a Steam account!
2) Must join the Destructoid group on Steam
3) Must join Dtoid's chatroom (AKA Steamtoid)

Simple, really. Now unto the first week's challenge.
What would Destructoid's Uncle look like?
Deadline: Monday, September 12th, 2011!

Picture can be anything. Drawn, photoshopped, or just Googled, it's all good!
Submissions can be sent by PM, commenting here, or by finding me through other means.
Prizes are given out on Mondays, because Mondays need less suck!

Do I have to talk dirty to you? Come on! Open up for daddy! I'm gonna shove a load into you! Here we go! Come on, it's nice and easy. Aaah! Come on, here we go! Ah! Take that! Take that! Come on! You don't want the crowbar, do you? Come on! OPEN UP! UUGGHH! I'm gonna shove my load into you whether you like it or not!

This week's winner is: Max!

Clearly this man knows Mr. Destructoid's history very very well. From the greasy gut, to the noose, and even his favourite game!

Second place: Mollygos!

This entry was just too good not to share. Another great image of what it's like to be in the family tree. While there may be no prize for the runner-up, there will always be cocks!
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