Life has been finally moving along this past week, which means I do have stuff to do, but I'm reluctant to move as fast as possible. So, rather than begin my online driving courses like a responsible adult, I just gave this "LUMP" thing a proper try not one hour ago. Possibilities ran through my head and my fingers pounded out some quick searches of choice topics such as Persona, Alien, and kaijus.
The blog that would have originally followed would've been a glorified LUMP ad where I only would get paid in FAP's/Dixon's. A quirky look into the dankest realms of this newfangled service which would make even one such as myself blush.
However, I quickly found that, in it's current form, LUMP is best used as an image browser rather than a search engine. Without searching for anything specific and, instead, sticking strictly to it's home page, you can find some really powerfully interesting or surpremely odd things. You click on this, you click on that, and, before you know it, that rabbit hole is way way deeper than you first thought.
But, not a whole lot of it was quite what I was after.
"Fuck it. I know how to salvage this."
For as well aware as I am of FurAffinity (I'm not afraid to say that I use it pretty often), some of my searches came up... very surprising. I cupped my mouth a couple times, lemme tell ya.
Normally, I'd keep this all to myself. But, I know you sad plums are just as sad and plumy as I am. So, eheh, enjoy?
Zeke and Grilder - The last of us
I could go for The Last Of Us being a bit more vibrant as opposed to strict photorealism. Heck, reimagine the game as a lighter mascot adventure ala Jak & Daxter. They really should fucking do that. That'd be a remaster worth purchasing.
Doctor Who + Ratchet and Clank crossover
Holy moley! Talk about brilliant ideas. I haven't even watched Dr. Who and I can get behind this.
Ratchet and Flank
That's right. I kept my Safe Search off.
Live dangerously, my friends.
This was one of those searches I assumed would turn up hardly a thing, if anything at all. Alan Wake doesn't exactly scream "furry". But, something I have learned over the years is that these communities will always find a way.
That has not been more reassured in quite some time.
It's not often I see eyes take front and center on a FurAffinity picture without the eyes looking up in a POV shot.
A Pokemon Persona? Just in case you aren't catching on: That's incredibly silly.
Party in the Rub' al Khali
Had the Subway promotion gone belly up, perhaps this could've been Sony's next step.
Free FurAffinity prints with select artists! Pre-order now, ya rascals!
Hide yo kids hide yo candy
For once, an inflated character portrait is fitting to the reference material.
All's Fair In Love & Mario Kart 8
And she's playing on 200cc. I am not worthy.
Welcome... To Greenvale
This was my first "Gosh..." moment of the night. Another "I don't think they'll have this.". Bravo.
My Little Lebowski
About 95% of the time, when I'm searching for images pertaining to particular video games or characters, there's going to be at least one bit of pony art within the first couple dozen results. It's like the Internet is turning against itself. We're living in the Information Age and our number one source for said information insists on delivering you fucking ponies.
Fear of the dark
Turning Riddick into a Lombax? Is this eventually canon? I mean, the third film does get pretty nuts, but not quite this nuts.
We all just want a Xenomorph we can have a beer with. As feisty as they may be with that tongue of their's, all is forgiven by the time their babies burst out of our tummies.
GC_Late For the Party
I totally didn't grab this from my favorites. I swear.
I was so desperately hoping to find something of Chris Tucker's character from The Fifth Element and FA did not disappoint!
Thank you very much.
Did someone just shove him into that outfit without any sort of prep? He looks surprised. Or aroused. Or both. I know I'd be both.
I'm not kidding when I say that this search killed my childhood just a tad. I completely forgot about Amelia and all that could be ruined from there on. So, here's something nice. Something that, at worst, may have you wonder just what these two look like having a flesh party.
Trust me. It's best you keep it in within your imagination.
I saw Mr. Arrow in positions I never needed to see him in. Never thought he could be in.
GODZILLA EATS MARGE
PICTURE CONFUSES ME
Godzilla wants Subway
I think we've all been there. Kaiju Con is over and done with, their vendors have shut down for the night, you've fought off both Gigan and King Ghidorah, you're exhausted, and you just wanna relax with a nice sandwich.
There is R63 of SpaceGodzilla. Suck it in.
Mike Patton headshot
Sadly, nothing fancy for Faith No More frontman Mike Patton. Which is weird. You'd think Mike Patton fans had more active imaginations.
Dave Growl Foo Fighter
I was going to caption a pun, until I saw what they already did there.
All I can muster is me shaking my head in silent, unnerved approval.
Dramatic Look Diz
I guess I should've at least expected to see some co-op shots of Jonathan Coulton and his fans. The 2% of my brain function that is completely demented and irrational wished for more.
God, those furry suits always creep me out. I can get down with anthropomorphic creatures, but that just look unsettling.
011 - JoCobo and Frontalot
Scratch what I said just a second ago. There actually is art of Jonathan Coulton as a Chocobo being ridden by a warrior MC Frontalot.
I would say I can no longer be surprised, but we still have some real shit to gander at.
This is genuinely awesome fanart.
There is proper R34 of Ziltoid the Omniscient, however. Much like with Treasure Planet's Captain Amelia, I'd prefer to keep that unholy trite where it dwells.
Considering the source material, one of the band members of Psychostick becoming a T-rex isn't that crazy. What would be crazy is if Rawrb sprouted a horse cock and fucked Alex back into position while screaming Hall & Oates singles.
Actually, that'd also be appropriate.
Here's the Bill Nye cover in question. It's twice as splendid as you may be thinking.
... yes? What's with the pause after the title? Where you going to explain why you anthropomorphized the lead singer of Def Leppard as a small mouse wearing cufflinks, knee boots, black cut-offs, and grinding down a stripper pole?
Because I'd like an explanation for why you have anthropomorphized the lead singer of Def Leppard as a small mouse wearing cufflinks, knee boots, black cut-offs, and grinding down a stripper pole.
Deftones - White Pony
This literally is the worst thing.
Five nights at Fredd........ Freddie's!
NO I TAKE IT BACK THIS IS WORSE HOLY SHIT WHY DID THIS HAVE TO HAPPEN YOU DON'T DO THAT YOU DON'T EVEN THINK THAT HOW COULD YOU
Midna colored Ralts, Kirlia, and Gardevoir
Hey! No need to fight over who's best (Midna) when you can have the best of both worlds!
I elect Midnavoir as Destructoid's official new mascot.
Y-yes, m'am. =o.o=
Kirby and Hibari
Two adorable pink warriors on an adventure for the ages. I assume Hibari's journey ends with a trip to a plastic surgeon to fix up that face of her's.
SUPER DUPER YOKO LITTNER
I'm sure some of you are into this. I almost envy you... almost.
It's terrible that I've spent more time watching Monster Musume than I have spent watching Kill la Kill, but it is actually a rather entertaining fanservice fest.
Naoto's Pimp Hand Is Strong
Naoto-kun demands satisfaction!
Rosalina the Echidna
Your Name + the Hedgehog could turn up worse results than this. However, Rosalina isn't known for her sense of humor. She'd probably just rework the Big Bang again like at the end of Mario Galaxy in hopes that we create a world without awkward Sonic fanart.
rosalina in splatoon
The squidling reminds me of the "Oh, you!" dog. As if to say "Oh, you, FA! Putting things where they shouldn't belong!".
Princess *inflate* Bubblegum
I'm right there with ya, Finn. That is one wicked giantess.
Yay Monday, Princess Bubblegum
Haha! Am I right? Monday's are like the bottom of a bowl of spaghetti.
Percival +Blaze the Cat
Another genuinely quality fanart!
MeMeMe! Stimpy Bikini
Annnnnnnnnnnnnd we'll end things here.