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4:44 PM on 03.12.2012

Animal Crossing Thus Far

I dont think I'm good at writing , but I'm here (again) to write a thing about a thing...

Animal Crossing is a game I have never actually bought with my own money. I always borrow it from
People . Mostly because I'm poor... But also because it's a top game.

List of good things bout animals crossings

Charming Characters
Wastes time
Dont know

I dont fucking know why I enjoy Animal Crossing I mean its fun , but it's everything that doesnt annoy me in one place and its so fucking tranquil and quiet and calming.

The soothingest thing ever it's literally the best stress reliever.

I had a bad day at school because I said stuff about soldiers and then got called "saddo".

So I went home and played animal crossing and bought a shovel and buried it. Then when I come back from school I will dig it up and have a golden one. Then I ate a whole bag of vegetarian haribo's and made some constellations. THEN I CAUGHT SOME FISHES AND BUGS. I really think that Animal Crossing Lets Go To The Paradise City Where The Grass is Yellow and The Girls Dont Talk To Me Because I Am A Nerd................ Jesus christ.

I'm tired of the same run of the mill shooter, strategy game , RPG , adventure game , sidescroller , Rhythm Game and driving game.

It's different and peacefull . I really want a 3DS just so I can get Animal Crossing . I really think that they should have an Animal Crossing clone on the PC so I can mod the fucking tits off of it.

The simplicity of the controls also is very attractive and pick up and play.

I dont think I have ever been in such suspense for my little bag of polygons to get a bigger house.

The graphics and presentation are "CuTe???????Ņ??" and beautiful very cartoony and every game should be like it.

If you havent played Animal Crossing you should . If you dont like it YOU ARE A RACIST...

Thanks for reading and sorry for all the grammatical incosistencies (<SPELLING MISTAKE) and spelling mistakes.

Thanks lol bye   read

8:38 PM on 01.03.2012

Are Gamers The Most Hatefull Culture/Group???


A couple of days ago I posted a blog about how I (AYE) never meet gamer girls. YOU ALL HATED IT. I mean I hated it. But CMON .

Thank you for reading it and thank you if you enjoyed it atleast a smidge.

One of the points in the blog was that people hate me. The majority of you hated it .

I'm sure if I were you

I would have hated it . And would have proceded to punch my keyboard and tell my alternate universe self that you're shot at writing. Ahem.

Since then I played MW3 with a friend. That game is hated by many of many people. I thought and think it's a well rounded game and was fun.

Things I Like:

Being A Cock

Things I hate:
Annoying People
A small Minority of Valve Fans
Minority of Blonde Girls
Any Physical Activity
And going out side.

My hate list is bigger than my like list . But dont take my word for it. Ask yourself , when was the last time you were angry at another gamer??


See I'm angry just writing this. Nope I'm not angry I'm just ticked off that someone can call me a retard over the Internet then go on to write utter shit . Sorry if you can point out that I'm talking directly about you but you did act like a bit of dick and weirdly enough I don't think I was being that much of a cock so you can probably see why I'm pissed off to the end of my tether.

So yet again thank you for reading(hating) and or liking my shit smear of a writing I did.

Let me just define another problem I have. My idea of a cblog is roughly written and not to be looked at for grammar,spelling or characteristics. So fuck not you.sorry.I love you. Baby.

Sorry about that and all that swearing how bout that guys

Ok last thing write the most hateful comments you can and I'll tell you if I cried or not. Go ahead. WRITE   read

7:30 PM on 01.01.2012

Gamer Girls . The Lack Of Them.

So I'm a nerd. If you didn't know already on which you're probably new to reading my drivel.

Dungeons and Dragons
Fantasy Books
Sci-Fi books
Video Games that are made by Nintendo ...

Just some of the things that I like . People usually don't like stuff like I do.

* just so you know I writ like three paragraphs but I backspaced them into the sky . They were abit like that whole blog I wrote that was about me not getting to talk to those are like not there. But the stuff that is written below is about me talking to girls. And failing. And losing faithsss.

This is the bit about gamer girls. Gamer girls are very rare especially in the real life. If this is just me please just tell me. When I was around 11 a thing called the Internet was around. The Internet opened my eyes to girls that actually game. In real life if I hear a girl talking about a video game it's usually something her boyfriend showed her. COD. The least said the better

. A girl I got kind of close to ( a girl that actually let me talk to her without her shouting EWWW) would usually talk about how she played kinect . I once told her about portal and told her about the physics and the humour and the story if I remember she said " That sounds boring" . She's now got a boyfriend and I don't really talk to her. A good place to start is Portal .Girls like portal , I found this out by talking to girl(s).

I only really talked to three girls about portal . The second girl I talked too plays Bejewled. And she's a massive bitch. The third one doesn't need a mention. Because.

I tried to make girls listen to me about nerd shit I like. I once even talked to a girl I sit next to in geography about my D&D character yorrick. She nodded her head and giggled. I can't bring myself to speak to her. I'd probably just embarass myself.

I don't get out much . I think that also harms my ability to speak to people nevermind girls. I mean I can speak to girls. But god fucking help me when I can grow a pair and ask a girl if she wants to go out and grab a coffee. Most girls I know don't like coffee. People hate you seb. People hate me.

THAT WAS REELY HAPPY . I'll add some smiley faces just so you don't laugh at me too much and more at the similey faces.


Thank you for reading.

Don't care too much.


Sorry there's no tags for this I get confused sometimes. I'm actually quite smart. Just out of place.   read

4:38 PM on 12.12.2011

My Gaming Year In Summary

Oh I'm writing.

So 2011 was a very good or bad year , depending on your opinion LIEK WIT MOST FINGS HHHHRRRRRGGHHHH.

Okay I'm trying to be as serious as a serial masturbator can be...

Fuck it.

2011 was a good year for FPS's as is every other year but more specifically for Battlefield fans . 2011 saw the release of Battlefield 3 . Both critically and acoustically acclaimed. I played the game on a top pc gaming rig so at any chance I got I shouted at my friends "HOW BOUT THAT CONSTANT TEXTURE POP-IN AND DRAW DISTANCE OF 80 YEAR OLD SHORT SIGHTED MAN (my dad). It was an all round fun game. Hahhaha what am I saying I spent about eight hours on that bitches and played 7 hours of multiplayer. I love battlefield I just couldnt take it more than 5 cups of herbal tea in a row.

Zelda also saw a big year in gaming . If your me and poor that is. I played wind waker (uncompleted) , Link to The Past (un/in/oncompleted) and ocarina of time (completed). One of which I have played through before and know like the back of my N64 controller. A bit of rain dropped through my window, I must have done the song of storms AMARIGHT. no I'm not. I've still to play skyward sword all because my brother bought it for my christmas and doesnt want me buying another copy just so I can play it.

Another iteration of call of duty was released and was well received by kids and critics alike. Unless youre too coOoOol for that. I thunk that call of duty has run its journey and should take an arrow to the knee anytime soon. Just shoot me in my lumbar. Which brings me on to my next game.

Yes thats right, I did just continue a paragraph in a seperate paragraph . LIE TO ME. Elder Scrolls Oblivion. Thats what everyone was playing right. Well I played it and its virtually unplayable compared to skyrim. Skyrim is a story about a serial-murder-rapist-pickpocketer-mage-rapist. Or whatever you want WHICH IS COOL RIGHT GUYS. Skyrims okay its just not my cup of herbal tea , I mean I like fantasy and magic shtuff but I prefer skyrim in short bursts rather than an energy drink fuelled playthrough. I prefer to take my time with things. Which is why Im bad at everything...

Now to my GOTY 2008+3 years... I think its probably deus ex 2024 or human revolution if youre not mentally retarded. Its a really fun game , stealth mixed with Dark knight mixed with smoking 50 a day. It makes me feel liek a boss anytime I punch a guy then take cover go invisible CONFUSE THE FUCKS then shoot them with my silenced pistol. So good. Youre asking what I thought of the end of the game. Well here I have to tell you something . See it as my dirty little secret. I didnt actually finish the game which I feel really bad for . Like I feel like crying because I didnt finish it. But I'll make it up to you jim bob Im going to make a c-blog everyday doccumenting my finishing off of Deus Ex :HR.

Thanks for waddling through my bog of writing and hope you will not judge me for my face.

I cant even take what I said seriously . Yeah I know I laughed aswell.

Thanks for reading and gutenbye.   read

5:14 PM on 12.05.2011

General Blargh

I'm bored.

Warning. In this 'ere c-blog there will be incosistent spelling ,grammar,jokes and punctuation but like hey what.

So I'm looking forward to christmas. Its weird for me . Snow happened while I was in school and everyone was like "SNOW" and I was like "SnOw" . I spoke to a girl today. I called her a hoe but bitches be crazy am I right. I wouldnt know cos I never speek to girls

The other day I was baby sitting but the weird thing is the kid came over to my house. He played with my childhood lego sets and he played on my wii. He was fat and didnt want to eat the salami and cheese sandwich I made for him . I touched meat. He didnt eat . His name was pete ( paul ) and he smelt like feet.

I hate the way I write which is why I rarely talk to girls . Because whenever I talk to girls I have to construct a sentence rather than be like " MY LEVEL 6703 ICE MAGE DIED LAST NGHT" but bitches be hatin on me and often when I talk to a girl she stares into space , making me think I should stop talking and sleep. Or stop drop and roll.

Someone told me that I should stop comparing myselg to others. Actually they said " BRAH YOU LIKE A GEEK SO GO AWAY" which made me think that. No it didnt.yes it did not.

In my english class were watching a film called skellig . Its about suicide or something but me and my friend got in an argument about one of the actors in it (I jyst said I had a friend) I thought he looked like that guy in sherlock, not sherlock but watson. On the other end of the ZX spectrum we have my friend who thought it was that guy off that show about mars. Cool people will know who Im talking about its called 30 second to mars or some cack like that. Its a tv show. I said that.

I can see my copy of links crossbow training from where I'm sitting.

I got ridiculed today in Physical Education by a guy . I also hate movement that doesnt involve me getting something out of it. Like getting food. I'm actually not fat just extremely lazy. I swear Im not fat.

Thanks for loathing/reading this here brain fart.

Guten bye.   read

10:50 AM on 11.01.2011

My Backlog Part uno

So about 2 weeks ago I wrote a BackLog seeing as my back log is unbearable I chose 10 games out off of the list and heres the reviewsss


Fallout is a Post-Apocalyptic isometric RPG action adventure dungeon-crawler. Well thats how I saw it. Players of D&D will love this (as did I) for its isometricness and dice rolley like nature. The game see's you venturing out of vault 13 (DONT CORRECT ME) to find a water chip and you have something close to 130 in-game days to find one and hilarity ensues as you fuckshitup and steal things and be evil. Im a terrible person. Its a pretty good game but some peoples patience will shorten quickly as combat is gruelling and saving is manual.

Lego Star Wars 2.

I think I may have peter-pan syndrome as I love playing "kids" games such as the lego games . For anyone that doesnt know lego games are beat-em ups with a nice shiny lego aestethic and its extremely fun so I dont know why people turn their noses up at fun. Its ye-old star wars in lego . I dont know what else to say other than that. Im also a terrible writer.

Call Of Duty 2.

See wikipedia...

Disclaimer I think I had Bioshock 2 on the list but I think I left it off so yeah I'll review it anyway.

Bioshizzle 2 .

Bioshock 2 consists of you being a big daddy and being nagged at by some woman... Then getting a little sister to steal the blood of any willing blood doner. Its like Bioshizzle but the weapons were better in the original. Graphics have definitely improved since Bioshizzle and the combat is WAAAYYY more fluid and entertaining. Cant wait for Bioshock Infinite now.

Thats all for now . But as I am off school due to sickness I will definitely be doing this at a faster rate.

Bye and what not.   read

10:18 AM on 10.16.2011

Sebs Backlog of Dewm.

Okay so I will write down my backlog and then I will pick one game that I , along with you're guidance will pick and play through til' completion then Review. Lets start this Female dog.

Elder Scrolls Oblivion et Morrow Wind
Kane and Lynch 1 & 2
World Of Worldcraft
Fallout 1
Fallout 2
Operation Flashpoint
S.T.A.L.K.E.R and all its sequels
Call Of Duty 2
Mass effect 1
Mass effect 2
Doom 3
Quake 2
Doom 2

Lego Star Wars II : The Original Trilogy
Odin Sphere
Earth Defense Force (some subtitle)
Silent Hill 2
BattleField :ModernCombat 2

Legend Of Zelda Majoras Mask

I think thats it , feel free to say anything that I've missed anything that I should play. Have your say and tell me what to play .

Thanks all.   read

9:58 AM on 08.15.2011

From Afar:Bioshock 2 (New Games Review Type Thing)

To kick things off Im going to explain this 'From Afar' series I'm doing. Basically instead of actually playing the game I will be watching someone play it , most of the time it will be my brother other times it may be a friend. Then I eventually get round to playing it my self seeing if it's better than it looks (or worse).

Lets start :Bioshizzle 2* a FPS adventure game for PC(reviewed),xbox 360 , PS3.

I have played the first Bioshizzle* and thought it was a competent "shooter" with small horror elements and a captivating story it was about a jazzed up smack-head who killed the nasty jazzed up smack-heads , hilarity ensues when ^SPOILER ALERT FOR BIOSHIZZLE* ONE^ an irish guys family like dies and then turns out he isnt irish and is actually an buisness american type with giant muscles , then you kill him.

Anyhoo Bioshizzle* 2. The game starts out with you Lawrence Fishburn being told that you should shoot yourself so you do , then you lose your little sister (except from she's not little and human(ATLEAST I THINK FUCK OFF IF IM WRONG)).Then you go on an epic journey through Rapture a place where jazzed up smack-heads try to kill you and sometimes succeed . Combat looks like it has been improved by allowing you Lawrence Fishburn to hold both a gun and you're hand up like your a primary school kid so you can plaz him up and shoot him down . Thats going on a plaque.

Its visually identical to Bioshizzle *1 . Actually I cant tell because I played Bioshizzle* on Xbox 360 and Bioshizzle 2 on PC so they look similar. The atmosphere has the same feel and the nasty jazzed up smack-heads are identical and act the same as they did in the 1st uno.

From the looks of it Bioshizzle* 2 has changed the hacking minigame AND BY GOLLY-FUCKING-GOD IT LOOKS WAAAYYY BETTER . A ticker goes from side to side and you press a button (SHUT UP ,I WASNT PLAYING) when it goes over a green part of the box thing , if you hit the blue you get a bonus so hip-hip hoo-friggin-way.

I think this game deserves 8/10†
From the looks of it anyway.

Stay tuned for part 2 when I actually play the game , hopefully it will be done in under 3 days as tommorow I go back to school so my productivity will be held back slightly oh well pip-pip cheerio good bye for now:D

* For anyone that watches Storm Dains series of "Adventures" in his series GISHAOTYA he called bioshock ,Bioshizzle so yeah ,understood ???   read

11:54 AM on 07.31.2011

FarCry2: why realism is an okay thing

FarCry 2 , a game set in africa . A continent of war. Well in Farcry's case .

Disease: In Farcry 2 you are burdened by malaria A REAL LIFE PROBLEM *ahem* in which the player gets fatigued and cannot run or jump for a prolonged time , you as the player also have to get pills to keep the malaria at bay (slightly anyway) in which you deliver stuff to people with pills.

By now you're probably getting bored and are going to the toilet but I'm going to start talking 'bout GUNS AND VIOLENCE AND WAR , the good stuff.

Crime: Farcry 2 is set in Africa where between malitia and gangs has allways been a real life problem for people in Africa. My mum and dad lived in South Africa where gun crime, gang wars ,murder,rape and virtually any crime you can think of happened , my dad's stereo in his car was nicked with the wind shield off of its hinges , my mum and dad had to hide in a cupboard many a time due to gun men pondering the street , so Im not exactly an expert in Africa but I have an extremely rough idea of what it was and is like. Back to the game , two governement type factions both with the same idea of killing and thriving ( probably the worst ever explanation of anything EVER) you're tasked with the choice of joining one or you can be with both.

Combat: Farcry 2 a shooter at heart (PISS OFF IT IS) has a very good selection of weapons all quite prone to jamming (realism) and not quite accurate , pretty realistic if you ask me :D. When you're health gets lowered a good amount you can "heal" yourself , this is basically picking a bullet out of a limb or poking it out with a finger . I'm no expert on bullet wounds but its pretty realistic that you take it out with a knife or a screwdriver or whatever , also syrettes can be used to heal your character.

Another game that tries realism is Operation Flashpoint , a realistic modern war shooter where one bullet deaths are often I both love and hate this due to dieing because you're retarded team mates cant shoot targets more than 2 feet infront of them .

My final verdict . Realism , good in small doses... LIKE OPIUM   read

1:26 PM on 07.28.2011

Broadband rant,Battlefield3 beta,being called a hipster and pokemanz

Second things first: FML

First things second never get BT total broad band internet especially if you have more than 3 people who use the internet alot. They say its unlimited but its more like a gigabyte limit a month. IT SUCKS .

3rd thing : IM IN THE BATTLEFIELD 3 ALPHA BETA .But as mentioned up tharr^^ my internets being as slow as road works its gonna take 31 hours to download also origin isnt that bad its basically EA download manager and it looks like it should be on a mac.

I got called a hipster in a bookshop today , I suppose I was wearing my Jimi Hendrix t-shirt and I was buying Cowboys and Aliens , Walking dead vol.3 and a banksy book.He looked fairly hipster him selfif I was being honest and also I dont think that saying "Wow you seem like a hipster" is good customer service.

Hey pokemanzz. This is what Im going to talk about the most as I just bought Pokemon Black today.
Pokemon ,where to start maybe with me saying about my first time. well ok I was young I had a gameboy , I bought leaf green got about 20 pokemon then the cartridge vanished into existence , which brings me to today. I was in game £30 and Game Reward Card in hand walked up to the DS section grabbed a copy and reg is my uncle so he touched me then I played Pokemon Black for about 3 hrs .B-B-B-BREAKDOWN TIMMEE!!!

Sound: the sound design in pokemon is chirpy but very accented or some other word like that . The musics a very good fit and most of the sounds hasnt really changed since soul silver , how would I know I only played it for like 40 mins . All in all 8/10

Graphics: A great bit of the graphics have been upgraded but it still keeps that "2D sprites with 3D -ish buildings" type thingey the sprites feel a bit more updated and so does the animation so 9/10

Story: Not much to say here other than EVIL TEAM HATE NEWBS TAKES POKEMANZZ OF KIDS AND EATS SHIT 6/10

Last but definitely not least
Gameplay: Turn based RPG -'em ups are my favourite genre so dont hate on teh bias. Battles flow smoothly . Its fun,addictive ,fun and enjoyable. Abit hard in places and some pokemon will have you ripping your eyeballs out then putting them back in BECAUSE YOU HAVE TO DEFEAT YOURE OWN FUCKING BEST FRIEND D8< then getting killed then put back to a poke center and URGH FUCK YOU CHEREN (Or whatever thou name shalt be) ehrm 9/10

Pokemon :Weird, quirky and resemblent of real life beings . Some are just fucking creepy though theres one thats basically a human face on a smooth blue tape worm , theres one thats basically a rock covered vagina . THERES ALSO ONE THAT IS AN ELECTRIC FUCKING UNICORN AND HE IS A SEXY BEAST. So yesh 9/10

Over all as a pokemon lover 9/10 as some one who has never played pokemon before 8/10 and for me 9/10 (even though it doesnt add up) so yeah bye people be sure to hate if you want and also boobs and stuff   read

7:09 PM on 07.15.2011

Why do you game??

Its 01:12 in the morning and I'm bored , so I'm writing this as a question to anybody and everybody , even though like 2 people will read this.

The other day I was sitting on the couch of my living room playing Cave Story on wii and my dad walked in and said " Why do you even like gaming"
I paused for about 10 seconds then said "It's fun and I dont have to be around people".
He stared at me for what felt like an eternity then left.

I felt my answer was wrong though, I spent many an hour infront of a tv with a couple of other friends playing Perfect Dark , Goldeneye and mario kart when I played it on a regular basis. It's not that I don't have to be social it's that It's an escape from people . You dont have to listen to people going on about how they just broke up with there girlfriend or there grandads having catarac surgery also I dont have to cater to other people , the food and the drink is all mine and if you're asking" has he allways been this socially retarded" , yes actually since I was about 9 , I wasnt the cool kid who'd go out and play football ( I cant play sports for the life of me ) or go out and drink with the big boys.I would stay in my house and play through Ocarina of Time for the fifteenth time .

So now it goes out to you , why do you game , or you could just tell me that I've spelt something wrong or tell me that I'm an angry bastard .   read

4:03 PM on 04.30.2011

Angry Birds is awesome???? ( old )

So whats going to be my first topic?? well obviously (Seriously Not That Obvious)* itís going to be the news that mobile developer Brian Meehan from Sourcebits said: ďThe world is changing and fast. Angry Birds is the worldís new Mario Bros. My kids will never own a DS or PSP. They have everything via smart phones and tablets. When I travel, I love to walk from the back of the plane to the front and see what people are doing on their devices. Not surprisingly, itís mostly games. I particularly see a lot of Angry Birds on iPhones and iPads. Not just one or two, but ten to 15.Ē Okay so first my argument. Super Mario Bros. (The NES original) was a new fresh new experience for children and adults in the 80ís the vibrant graphics were amazing at the time it provided hours of entertainment where as Angry Birds is just a mobile game which people of all ages play but my main argument is that angry birds isnít an original idea , This is that big of a deal seeing as the modern grey FPS era of gaming has sunk in to every 8-17 year olds brain (I am in this bracket but do not play that much FPS games) Angry Birds is a clone of Crush the castle a flash game that has a good following .But even more I think that Super Mario Bros. was more of an original than Angry birds is to this day . My agreement on the subject is that Angry Birds has a very big following for 5 year olds and 40 year old mothers everywhere I have the game and can agree that it is a good game. But me the Hardcore Gamer that I am itís just WAAAAYYYY too casual for me (I sound like an idiot now donít I) itís just not my thing I prefer the platforming of Mario to the murdering of pigs In angry birds.

Well thatís me finished but yeah I sorta left that hanging on a thread didnít I
Its old I know just bare with meh as I have more of the same rubbish I produce for the extremely bored person who's actually going to look at this   read

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