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Cblogs of 5.10.08 + Pigisms
Scary Womanizing Pig Mask \| 9:12 PM on 05.10.2008	14 comments

Today was a slow day for cblog posts, so I had a nice relaxing day of recapping and playing Mario Kart Wii, Audio Surf (Which I desperately need help with =P)and Everyday Shooter. Hope you had fun reading my two recaps and that you'll enjoy Sadie G's tomorrow!

How awesome would be if Destructoid was a newspaper?

Imagine if when you subscribed to Destructoid you're house/apartment/dorm/model mini mansion/hole in the ground in Iraq was connected to a vast system of pneumatic tubes. You were also given a type writer. Every time a new front page or cblog story is written, it is sent to you through the tube. You also get a new paper whenever someone either comments on a post or edits it. If someone makes their blog hidden, you are sent a memo and are obliged to incinerate your copy of the post. Immediately. You compose your story on the type writer and tape on pictures that you find in the magical big box that contains all the pictures ever taken. drawn, rendered or other. You then place it in the pneumatic tube and WHOOSH! away it goes! It is sent to a massive computer system buried somewhere under the Arctic Circle that then prints out copies for everyone and distributes them. PM's and forum posts are handled in a similar fashion. If you get banned, you can still send and receive posts, only the tubes are reorganized so that you're sent stories/PMs/forum posts/comments get sent to the middle of nowhere!

A model mini mansion

A hole in Iraq

The computer system I recommend we use to manage the formal arctic pneumatic system (The FAP system)

The magic box that contains all the pictures of ever

Where banned writers stories go

Gaviniers fan girls

This made even less sense then my Every Day Shooter pigism

*-A wonderful tribute to Collette, the queen of both Destructoid and Chocobos
*-Beautiful pencil artwork of Samus, Old Snake and Mariotair
*-Introducing� the Blogocube
*-Holy genetically modified dogs Pugman!
*-Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles: LIVE!
*-I can�t handle this
*-Street Fighter Kart Racing is the best idea I�ve heard this week
*-The best Cblog series on Destructoid

A-A nice analysis of three soon to be released shooters (pdrobay)
A- Rasp||\|uDO !SNt +0 FoND 0f 7HE W][1$ 8uS5IN3$S |\/|OdEl
S-Impressions of Pokemon Neophyte (GoggolrAscendant)

C-May Cblog Xbox Scavenger Hunt (Ends 5.31)
C-FES Contest (Ends 6.12)
C-T-shirt contest

E-You can not miss NARP
F-Vote for the new timeslot for PS3 FNF
F-Euro and Early FNF recaps
F-Euro FNF video recap
C-No. Thank YOU!
C-Topher needs big, clunky, new headphones
C-CountingConflict is in a slump :(
I-Welcome to Destructoid Seraphim! Hope you get out of your slump as well!
I-Welcome to Destructoid Spuerezekiel!
B-Another happy Birthday to Collete!
R-Can�t let you play that Xbox

N-Free Timeshift DLC
N-Just give me a remake of Crystal
V-Extra Extra Strength Tylenol: Not for Mario Kart
V-New Left for Dead developer interview
V-PS3 Home is crazy good at launching multiplayer games
V-Game Trailers is a subsidiary of the Ministry of Truth
R/V-Brief Bloom Blox Breviw
R-Exclusive Pre-release review of The Bourne Conspiracy
R-Speed Racer DS is actually really good :O
R-Kooperert�s cornucopia of reviews
T-Haze impressions
T-Orcified-Xoboxer reaaally wants� Midtown Madness 4
T-Douchebags on XBLA have turned GeneralWong into a crazed serial killer
T-I <3 that PSGrill picture so much :)
T-I�m a Nintendo gamer
T-Wall of pictures
T-Justify you�re allegiance 2
T-Possible Half Life/Mist connection spotted

F-Six String Samurai

F-I thought I would get through the whole night with out a failure
F- I didn�t :(

HITCHHIKER'S GUIDE TO CBLOG RECAPS

Sorry about this post. It may quite possibly be the worst thing I have ever written in my life. To make it up to you I give you this. This is my favorite video of ever. Words can not describe how much I love it.

Enjoy!

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13 comments | showing # 1 to 13

Hamza CTZ Aziz

Why does everyone spell Colette's name wrong?!

Scary Womanizing Pig Mask

@Hamaza CTZ Aziz
I blame firefox's wonky spell checker =P

MrSadistic

If Dtoid was a newspaper, it would be great material to read while taking a poop.

Anyway. Great job, I love you.

Conrad Zimmerman

Wow. I appreciate the compliment, S.W.P.M. And that video... I can't tell if they're serious. Hilarious either way, but if it isn't a joke, it's also kinda sad.

Scary Womanizing Pig Mask

@Mr Sadistic
It would be indeed :)

@Conrad Zimmerman
You earned it! I think they're just joshing around. If you look at the kid's face at the end, they seem to just be having fun. I hope so at least.

Y0j1mb0

Great job Bro.

flaming burrito

Heh, those guys on the video are my heroes.

Snorlax fucking pwns you.

naia-the-gamer

I wanna fangirl all over that Arrested Development pic.

TrailerParkJesus

lol That video is funny as hell. I could listen to that on loop forever.

"He's more ripped that you! You can't pull ten Pokemon. Yes I can!"

And thanks for the pick! First time/best day evar! And to think I almost edited that SF Kart Racing bit out.

Thanks again for this great public service

Batthink

The haircut of your avatar and the cosplaying counterpart occaisonally concerns me. Slightly phallic-looking. O_o

Scary Womanizing Pig Mask

@Y0j1mbo
Thanks!

@Flaming burrito and TrailerParkJesus
Thanks! My favorite part was "That aint no Pokemon that's a Chinese meth dragon!"

@Naia-The-Gamer
I tried to find the picture of George Sr. in his hole for the Iraq picture, but couldn't find it :(

ElfAngel7

in the unlikely event that the newspaper headline were to become a reality, the size of my erection would be visible from the fjords of Norway.

Artix Lumin

Remind me to send you the awesome award of awesomeness.

Click connect and comment instantly!

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about me

Post I'm proud of:
The hidden themes of the end of Earthbound as recommended by Chad Concelmo

Giygas: A Psychoanalysis of Evil Itself

The Fear!: Running Out of Items

A Time to Build: Constructing a Deck

Shick vs. Scary: Sonic Adventure 2

Scary Womanizing Fashonista: Hobo Phoenix Hat

Destructoid Theater Critic: Legally Blonde the Musical

Scary Womanzing Artist: Latest Edition

The Four Most Tragically Underrated Video Game Soundtracks You Mongoloids Need to Hear

Why Persona 4's Ending is Bunk

Jim Sterling is Secretly Boy George

Proud Reserve Cblog Recapper:

Info:
PSN Name: PKStarstorm
Steam Name: Scary Womanizing Pig Mask
Wii Friend Code: 0233 0214 5099 7279
Email: scarywomanizingpigmask@gmail.com

Pro Pokemon Trainer

Not so pro TeeEffTwoer

Now Playing:
Final Fantasy V (SNES)
Final Fantasy X (PS2)
Professor Layton and the Diabolical Box (DS)

About Me:
Favorite game: Mother 3
Favorite genre: JRPGs
Favorite series: Mother/Earthbound, Pokemon, Final Fantasy, Persona, Touhou, Metal Gear and Ace Attorney
Favorite animus: Gurren Lagann and The Melancholy of Haruhi Suzumiya
Favorite book: So You Need to Disarm a Chimpanzee
Favorite musicals: Legally Blonde the Musical and Gyakuten Saiban: Resurrected Truth
Favorite Godzilla Monster: Mothra
Name origin: The Scary Womanizing Pig Mask (or Fierce Pork Trooper) from Mother 3
Avatar origins: An amazing drawing of Mother 3's Kumatora done for me by the awesome Ashley Davis

Amazing artwork drawn for me by the fantastic Ashley Davis, NotGeoff and Sponson: (<3 you all!)
Daryan by Ashley
Kumatora by Ashley
SWPM #1 by NotGeoff
SWPM #2 by NotGeoff
Ocelot by Sponson

Dubbed a "Moral Crusader" by Takeshi.

My amazing Destructoid Trading Card made by the incredible The Ghost

The Great Retro Quiz:

Donkey Kong Country

Super Mario Kart

The top ten:

NES Games
1. Metroid
2. Megaman II
3. Mother/Earthbound 0
4. The Legend of Zelda
5. Super Mario Brothers 3
6. Super Mario Bothers 2 (US Version)
7. Super Mario Brothers
8. Kirby's Adventure
9. Megaman III
10. Megaman

SNES Games
1. Mother 2/Earthbound
2. Super Metroid
3. Super Mario World 2: Yoshi's Island
4. Final Fantasy 6
5. Final Fantasy 4
6. Super Mario World
7. Chrono Trigger
8. Kirby Superstar
9. Super Mario RPG: Legend of the Seven Stars
10. The Legend of Zelda: A Link to the Past

N64 Games
1. The Legend of Zelda: Majora's Mask
2. Pokemon Snap
3. The Legend of Zelda: Ocarina of Time
4. Super Mario 64
5. Super Smash Brothers
6. Star Fox 64
7. Kirby 64: The Crystal Shards
8. Pokemon Stadium 2
9. Harvest Moon 64
10. Paper Mario

Gameboy Games
1. Pokemon Red/Blue/Yellow
2. The Legend of Zelda: Link's Awakening
3. Pokemon Pinball
4. Metroid II: The Return of Samus
5. Tetris DX
6. Star Wars: The Empire Strikes Back
7. Gameboy Camera
8. Tintin and The Temple of the Sun
9. Super Mario Land
10. Super Mario Land 2: 6 Golden Coins

Gameboy Color Games
1. Pokemon Gold/Silver/Crystal
2. The Legend of Zelda: Oracle of Seasons
3. The Legend of Zelda: Oracle of Ages
4. Pokemon Trading Card Game
5. Pokemon Puzzle Challenge
6. Mario Tennis
7. Super Mario Brothers DX
8. Kirby Tilt 'n' Tumble
9. Wario Land 3
10. Metal Gear Solid

PSX
1. Metal Gear Solid
2. Final Fantasy VII
3. Super Puzzle Fighter II Turbo
4. Street Fighter Alpha 2
5. Street Fighter Alpha 3
6. Harvest Moon: Back to Nature
7. Castlevania: Symphony of the Night
8. UmJammer Lammy
9. PaRappa the Rapper
10. Resident Evil

GBA
1. Mother 3
2. Pokemon Fire Red/Leaf Green
3. Mario and Luigi: Superstar Saga
4. Wario Ware Inc: Mega Microgames
5. Metroid Zero Mission
6. Pokemon Ruby/Sapphire/Emerald
7. Yu-Gi-Oh Worldwide Editon: Stairway to the Destined Duel
8. Sonic Advance
9. Wario Land 4
10. Sonic Battle

Gamecube
1. Super Smash Brothers Melee
2. Paper Mario: The Thousand Year Door
3. Luigi's Mansion
3. Super Mario Sunshine
4. Custom Robo
5. Super Monkey Ball
6. The Legend of Zelda: The Wind Waker
7. Animal Crossing
8. Mario Kart: Double Dash!
9. Legend of Zelda: Four Sword Adventure
10. Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life

PS2
1. Persona 3 FES
2. Metal Gear Solid 2: Sons of Liberty
3. Final Fantasy X
4. Metal Gear Solid 3: Snake Eater
5. We <3 Katamari
6. Katamari Damacy
7. Persona 4
8. Shadow of the Colossus
9. ICO
10. Soul Calibur 2

DS
1. Phoenix Wright Ace Attorney: Trials and Tribulations
2. Phoenix Wright Ace Attorney: Justice for All
3. Hotel Dusk Room 215
4. Professor Layton and the Curious Village
5. Pokemon Diamond/Pearl/Platinum
6. Phoenix Wright: Ace Attorney
7. Mario Kart DS
8. Apollo Justice: Ace Attorney
9. Advance Wars Dual Strike
10. Animal Crossing: Wild World

PSP
1.-10. Pangya: Fantasy Golf

Wii
1. Super Smash Brothers Brawl
2. Zach and Wiki: Quest for Barbaros' Treasure
3. Super Mario Galaxy
4. Trauma Center: Second Opinion
5. Wario Ware Smooth Moves
6. No More Heroes
7. Wii Play
8. Mario Kart Wii
9. Pokemon Battle Revolution
10. Wii Sports

PS3
1. Metal Gear Solid 4: Guns of the Patriots
2. Valkyria Chronicles
3. Flower
4. Super Puzzle Fighter 2 Turbo HD Remix
5. Street Fighter 4
6. Soul Calibur 4
7. Rockband 2
8. Street Fighter 2 Turbo HD Remix
9. Metal Gear Solid 4 Database
10. Talladega Nights

RPGs
1. Mother 3
2. Earthbound
3. Persona 3 FES
4. Paper Mario: The Thousand Year Door
4. Final Fantasy X
5. Final Fantasy IV
6. Mario and Luigi Superstar Saga
7. Chrono Trigger
8. Persona 4
9. Final Fantasy VI
10. Final Fantasy VII

Action-Adventure Games
1. Cave Story
2. Super Metroid
3. The Legend of Zelda: Majora's Mask
4. The Legend of Zelda: Link's Awakening DX
5. Metroid Zero Mission
6. The Legend of Zelda: The Wind Waker
7. The Legend of Zelda: The Phantom Hourglass
8. The Legend of Zelda: Ocarina of Time
9. The Legend of Zelda: Oracle of the Seasons
10. The Legend of Zelda: Oracle of the Ages

Fighting Games
1. Super Smash Brothers Melee
2. Super Smash Brothers Brawl
3. Super Smash Brothers 64
5. Street Fighter Alpha 2
6. Street Fighter 4
7. Soul Calibur 2
8. Street Fighter Alpha 3
9. Marvel vs. Capcom 2
10. Darkstalkers: Vampire Savior 2

First-Person Shooters
1. Team Fortress 2
2. The Ship
3. Bioshock
4. Half Life 2
5. Left 4 Dead
6. Halo: Combat Evolved
7. Half Life
8. Goldeneye 007
9. Perfect Dark
10. Wolfenstien 3D

Racing Games
1. Mario Kart DS
2. Mario Kart: Double Dash
3. Mario Kart Super Circuit
4. F-Zero X
5. Mario Kart Wii
6. Mario Kart 64
7. F-Zero
8. Super Mario Kart
9. Konami Kaczy Racers
10. Lego Racers

Platformers:
1. Super Mario Galaxy
2. Super Mario World 2: Yoshi�s Island
3. Super Mario World
4. Super Mario 64
5. Super Mario Brothers 3
6. Super Mario Brothers 2 US
7. Sonic the Hedgehog 2
8. Super Mario Brothers
9. Sonic Adventure 2
10. Megaman 2

Shumps
1. Imperishable Night
2. Embodiment of the Scarlet Devil
3. Mountain of Faith
4. Perfect Cherry Blossom
5. Cho Aniki
6. Star Fox 64
7. Sin and Punishment
8. Phantasmagoria of the Flower View
9. 1924
10. Gamma Brothers