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Scary Granules is a podcast about videogames, movies and generally all things horror, not to mention a frightening journey deep into the twisted psyches of two people who frankly should have been certified by now.

If you like an hour and a half of nonsense poured into your ears then you've come to the right place!

Name us and we shall have power no more:

Scary Youtube Home

Glowbear's Channel

Questions/abuse/rants to

scarygranules at

Or reach either of us directly:

Echoes from the past:

Saying Herro
Episode 1
All About the Irelands!
Episode 2
Hey Tash What ya Connin'?
Episode 3
Space Lobster
Episode 4
In Which the Panties get Moist
Episode 5
The Christmas Special
Episode 6
Pancake Space Marines
Episode 7
The Arthouse Special
Episode 8
Little Kebab Shop of Horrors
Episode 9
Rub it on mah face
Episode 10
Birdman's Vagina Special!
Episode 11
Taking it up the Perry Mason
Episode 12
Hairy White Mexican Down
Episode 13
DeRezzed Special (2013)
Episode 14
Attack of the Stevil!
Episode 15
Hayden Christensen ate my dog
Episode 16
The Lust of Spock
Episode 17
Now Wash Dem Hands
Episode 18
Graceful in Bed
Episode 19
Armored Core Dildos
Episode 20
France is Creepy
Episode 21
Ellen Page in a Sailor Suit
Episode 22
Glowbear gets Willy Whispered
Episode 23
Attack of the Tentacle Monsters
Episode 24
The Clickety Clack 25th Special!
Episode 25

You can also download them all Here.
Following (2)  


So it's been a while since I've written one of these (Panza here) so I might be a bit rusty... but SCARY GRANULES EPISODE DESCRIPTION INCOMING!

We have a lovely episode of Scary Granules for you today. There will be pages, and Ellens, and possibly talk of Alien(s)... just for a change! Umm, and we talk about... err.. a game, we, err...

Ok, so I lied. We're pretty boring this week/month/century! It's been a slow week in terms of games news, so sue me. What you do have to look forward to though is a scintiliating 12 hours of myself and Glowbear chatting about videogames!*

*It's not actually 12 hours long, it just feels it.

Glowbear is on the top of a bin for this episode, we talk about the Evangelion Manga, Disaster Report, Raw Danger and ofcourse... David Schwimmer masturbating onto a table! OMG, folks, this may just be the most exciting podcast EVER!

Oh come on, you could at least pretend to be listening ;_;

So yeah, if you like flagellating yourself with cold hard steel why not do the aural equivalent and listen to this here podcast?

Pretty please?

Scary Granules Episode 22 - Ellen Page in a Sailor Suit


Alternate Link

Are you offended by the homosexual cliches that popped up in this episode? Why not write in and tell us how terrible we are as human beings by emailing:  

Official Scary Granules HQ Website

Or alternatively talk/wag your finger at us directly:

Do you ever wonder "why do people do the things they do?" Well we often wonder why the French (especially those with diplomatic privileges) think they can stroke our Glowbear's bare knees whilst she tries to get 5 fooking minutes of peace to herself.


Waffling about games and alike takes up Part One as usual and then my little possums, Part Two delves into the titillating world of knee-stroking, BATSHIT patent laws in the nether-verse of Candy Bruce Banner Crushes, and our slightly un-gaming related thoughts on a series of documentaries that UK's channel 4 have recently aired, which has many people divided and not in the sensual way listening to our podcast causes so many to feel!

Would you sex us? We'd sex us... if we were drunk.

Scary Granules Episode 21 - France is Creepy

Listen here

Youtube Link

Download Here

Send us questions/comments/guest requests/shoe-horns to:

Official Scary Granules HQ

Our individual attempts at having an opinion forum online

*Copyrightwise - We own nothing but ourselves!

WE'RE BACK FROM OUTER SPACE....Yes you may have seen that recent acclaimed film where Panza has a shaved head and gets stuck in space and is the reason George Clooney is dead.

To kick off the New Year, we're talking about the same ol' drivel. Games we've played, things we've touched, men we've pretended to be to get ahead in the economic market. It's all jam-packed like a packet of jam in this fresh episode

Part 1 has us recap the games we've greased controllers with, films and shows we've tried out and even the odd mention of literature, because we r schmurt! 

What? Google "ArmaCore" and this is the legit game!

Then in Part 2 we focus on the more positive tidbit stories from 2013, give our opinions on Alien Isolation and explain in an almost philosophical level exactly what SEGA is and how they work. 

Then we give a very rapid round up of our favourite games this past year. Well Glowbear does, because she knows how to talk. Her mouth can move in ways that will make you wish you were...deaf. Panza's ass moves in a way that would make you wish you were Beyonce. 

ANYHUGHJACKMAN...Onwards with the show!

Scary Granules Episode 20 - Armoured Core Dildos

Listen here

Youtube Link

Download Here

Send us questions/comments/guest requests/shoe-horns to:

Official Scary Granules HQ

Our individual attempts at having an opinion forum online

*Copyrightwise - We own nothing but ourselves

We got sent an Alpha preview for the upcoming, atmospheric Stasis. Check out their website and kickstarter.

For your pleasure we've got our video preview and a written one for you videophones out there. 

Then back to the latest Scary Cherry Pops aka a name we gave to when we play games for the first time, not something sordid you'd find on a Russian ebay.

One Late Night

A look at Thunderbirds Games

7 Days


Don't say we don't cater to EVERY desire. This time we've got Ghoulish ghost babies, neat mobile phones that save your life and PUPPETS FROM A TIME GONE BY.

Cry of Fear

Home (this is where the condoms killers are at you sick beasts)

Gerry Anderson's Thunderbirds Games

Happy fapping!

Scary Granules
7:52 AM on 11.04.2013

We gave the uber disturbing, depression metaphor game The Cat Lady a go and yeah it's pretty messed up.

We also checked out a bit of The Swapper and were pleased with what we've seen so far. Glowbear intends to finish that one.

As always, likes, subscribes and passing the germs is greatly appreciated!

I don't...know....why...