(Foreword: As someone who recently joined due to the current contest, I figured it would be polite to make an introductory post first rather than jumping directly into the contest itself. Also, the contents of this post contain varied levels of pretentious tone and prig-words, as I thought it would help increase my word count :) Any patience/endurance while reading is happily noted.)


Destructoid, Destructoid, you sneaky steel seductress. Quite content I was, lurking and observing your daily activities through the peephole known as my laptop. I didn’t expect to have a liaison with you this way and so soon.



I once made an account here simply for the sake of having one, but I long since abandoned it as I never used it or needed it to view any of the content within the site. I never even would have considered starting a c-blog. Generally I’m a shy person and fairly uncomfortable with large crowds. The large crowd in this case being you, Dtoiders with "cred," of course.
That’s not to say I’ve never participated in online communities (which I like to believe I was dedicated). Though they were generally forum based or I wore the mask of anonymity. I even dabbled in MMORPGs for a time. But each website was eventually usurped by cash whores or my eventual apathy.
You could say I gave up on investing serious time on the internets.

Then this certain contest article came rolling into my RSS feeds.



A PROTECTOR FIGURE? OSTs AND ARRANGEMENTS? A SIGNED SEQUEL?
The protector alone radiates high levels of cute and blind lust. You would need to be mad to refuse a chance to win even one of the prizes. Unless you hate Etrian Odyssey, free stuff, and overall satisfaction.
Not I. The original game made my socks fly off due to the amount of rock it induced. And I wasn’t even wearing socks.

Yet the rules state I must create a blog entry. That in turn involves revealing my existence to you, where I had no prior intention to do so. Not to mention I had already given up on committing myself to another online group. But that chance, small it may be, for a protector figure is just too enticing to resist. Community aversion be damned!



Lured solely by that idea, I believe the term "contest whore" is applied. And my addition to the potential flood of newcomer contest entries is likely to sour any first impressions. Then again, my internet penis can't ejaculate offline anyways.
I could simply take my exit once the contest is over. But, could I in good conscience leave after I’ve taken the time to write a page full of words (read: wall of text) and doodles? No, because once I’ve put my foot in the door I have to step inside and close that door behind me.



So I joined for purely selfish reasons. I have come to terms that I will be placed in the same boat of new users who have joined for the same purpose, and shunned as a materialistic douchebag. But that’s okay as I have a guilt complex to keep me in check and not let an unused username lie forgotten without good cause. Even that implication of sticking around is selfish: I don’t want to feel bad. That said, I look forward to your robotic guidance :)