I'm so effing excited about this game, I can hardly stand it.

Seriously. My loins are practically quivering with anticipation.

Here's a few reasons why, in my humble opinion, this game will kick absurd amounts of ass.

1) It's made by BioWare. To me, BioWare can do no wrong. The first game I played by them was Knights of the Old Republic, which is currently one of my top-10 games of all time. I thought the Light/Dark system fit perfectly with the Star Wars universe - especially the visual effects it could have on your character. Pale, flaky-faced Dark Jedi, for example. The voice acting was great, the plot was great, the character's individual stories were great, and there's still quite a bit of replay value left. Seriously. If you've done Dark/Light-side male, try female. Some conversations go differently, and I know the ending can go differently in some ways.

Mass Effect is another favorite of mine, despite its little flaws.

I'm willing to trust BioWare, given that their last two major franchises are two of my favorite games ever. And I've been playing games for like 20 years now. Dang.

2) BioWare knows how to make a vast universe. KotOR had it easy because it inherited one of the most beloved universes in fiction - Star Wars. Most of the races were guaranteed hits - Wookies, Twi'leks, etc.

But my favorite thing about Mass Effect is the way it created a whole new universe of unique races and planets. It's almost unnecessary how much depth is in the game. But that's just how BioWare does it. Citadel politics between the Turians, humans and Asari. Races that feel underrepresented like the Volus, Batarians or Elcor. Really - they could have left the Elcor out entirely and it wouldn't have hurt the game. Or the pink jellyfish race, the Hanar. But that's just how BioWare does it.

When I first heard about this game, I trusted that it would be a quality game. But now that I think of it, I'm sure this game, like Mass Effect, will be jam-packed with all kinds of history, politics and culture. It won't simply be elves, dwarves and humans. It will probably be filled with all kinds of ridiculous make-believe goodies about ancient nations and culture clashes. I mean, there's already books about it.

It's pretty nerdy, I'll admit. But hey...I'm on a video game blog.

3) You can get a War Dog. I didn't want to know any spoilers going into the game, but I happened to see a video where one of your companions is a badass dog that follows you and bites the hell out of people.

Dogs are cool. Especially dogs that are simultaneously cute and awesomely badass (like Boney from Mother 3). That's what War Dog looks like. It makes puppy noises that say "I want to love and be loved," and then it sees an enemy and its like "lemme bite this guy's face off real quick."

4) 70 hours of gameplay? AND replay value?! It's awesome, I tell you. I'm at one of those points where I say "Man, I need a good game to play. One that will be new and fresh but also take up a lot of my extra free time." Enter Dragon Age. It will probably hold me over quite well until Mass Effect 2's January 26th release date.

But as if that's not enough, it seems like it will offer a great deal of replay value. 6 unique story origins? I have to play this game 6 times, you say? DEAL.

5) It's out in freakin' six days. How am I supposed to focus..?

I'm sitting here, staring at my Labor Economics notes. I have a test tomorrow, another next Thursday, and a lame presentation the week after that.

But damn it.

I just wanna kill dragons, you know?

ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh

I like movies. Scratch that, I like GOOD movies. (That sounds cocky, but you know what I mean.) I've spent a lot of times watching movies of many genres - new, old, black and white, new releases, foreign films, etc. So it's natural that when I hear or read a good story, I might wonder how it could be translated to film.

I also like video games. Some video games have good stories. Others don't, but are still quite a bit different than what we always see on screen. So again, it's natural that when I think about some of my favorite games, I might ponder how they could be interpreted on film.

The key is "could be." I realize that, with very few exceptions, video game movies suck my wangbone.

But what if I were a badass film director, with all the resources and influence to make a critically-acclaimed, smash-hit video game movie..?

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Mega Man 2

The first game I would want to make into an Oscar-worthy film would probably be Mega Man 2. I've been thinking about it a lot lately, probably because someone showed me this - http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xDeGpZ3z7js. The story is, for the most part, a mix of Mega Man games 1 and 2.

The movie would begin sometime in the future (20XX), where technology is seeing some impressive breakthroughs - most importantly, the creation of robots and other complex machines. Dr. Thomas Light and his team of scientists have become very famous for creating what they call "Master Robots" - advanced machines with artificial intelligence and the power to supervise other, lesser machines. Several of the master robots are put to work around the globe - "Air Man" helps harness wind-powered energy, "Wood Man" might be in charge of reforestation and shit like that, "Crash Man" would be aiding in drilling and mining, etc. Hardly worth mentioning is Dr. Light's robot assistant, who later becomes the hero of the movie, obviously.



Critics of artificial intelligence and robots with free will are strongly opposed to the master robots, of course, and their fears are confirmed when 8 of Light's creations begin to go haywire. Dr. Light's robot assistant, however, volunteers to be converted to a fighting robot and begins to track down and destroy the corrupted master robots. He begins to be known as the Mega Man.

Eventually it is discovered that Dr. Albert Wily, a previous member of Light's team, is behind the 8 master robots' reprogramming. Wily has gone mad with jealousy, as Dr. Light has received most of the attention for their work, including many prestigious scientific awards. His plan was for the robots to gather resources and energy so that he could build even better creations than Dr. Light and humiliate him in front of the world. Obviously, Mega Man would eventually defeat him and his creations.

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Why I think this would be awesome, if done right

Basically, there's so much potential to take an amazing 2D game and bring it to life. So much depth to go into, with the right script. We all know Dr. Wily is evil, but why? Why is it that Mega Man is pure, but Proto Man (who would have to be in the sequel) goes rogue? If these robots have free will, do they also have feelings? How do they know right from wrong? How much freedom do they really have? Can Mega Man be corrupted like the others were?

There's also the potential to make the fights amazing. We all remember how to beat Bubble Man - don't jump too high, use Metal Man's weapon. Easy. But if badass fighting robots were real, they wouldn't simply hop and shoot. It'd be a bit more like the Transformers movie, but with no characters like Jazz to act ghetto and completely ruin a scene.

The design of most of the robots would require a bit of artistic freedom, too. I'd like for them to look as realistic as possible. For example, I picture Wood Man as a very large, very powerful machine, that possibly camouflages with his surroundings. He definitely would NOT be a fat log with a face on top.


Not invited to my movie.

The powers of the robots would also be expanded. Wood Man would not surround himself with leaves and then throw them slowly towards you. One of his moves would be to place his arms in the ground and force vines and roots to grab Mega (similar to a Druid's Entangle spell in Warcraft 3). He would also be strong enough to rip trees out of the ground.

The powers that Mega takes, then, would also be expanded. It wasn't very fair that Air Man could knock you across the room AND shoot 10 tornadoes at a time, while Mega Man is left with 3 tornadoes that shoot diagonally across the screen. For example, Mega Man could throw Metal Man's saw blades, or use them as an extension of his arm, like a chainsaw or knife.

The actor for Mega Man would have to be an adult, but one who looks youthful. Sort of like Elijah Wood as Frodo, but without the vagine. Tobey Maguire as Peter Parker -ish.

Another reason for making this movie would be the potential as a franchise. I worked at a summer camp the past two years and the kids were CRAZY for Transformers. This movie would have more action, less Michael Bay, and would NOT be 2 1/2 hours. Plus, I'm an award-winning director, so the parents would be all over that. Toys galore, and it sets up nicely for a sequel (introducing Proto Man and maybe Rush).

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Scenes that sum up what I'm trying to say

There are a few scenes in my head that make me most excited for the day that I am randomly a wealthy / influential / brilliant movie director. Here are a few examples.

The fight against Wood Man

Mega would not have fought Heat Man by this point, so he can't simply burn the whole place down. Mega would be searching a forest for Wood Man, who would be hidden amongst the trees (since he'd be huge and tree-like in appearance) and camouflaged from his scanners. Wood Man would attack, possibly via roots and vines, or by trying to grab him. Mega Man would be on the defensive, evading the trees that he would swing and using his Metal Man blades to get out of the vines (BTW he would use these saws as a melee weapon just as often as throwing).

Eventually Mega would slice through a tree and kick it over, forcing Wood Man to catch it before it lands on him. By then Mega would have dashed to the side and hurled a saw blade at Wood Man. Unable to defend himself, he would be sliced in half, explode, and Mega would scan the remains to capture his powers.

The fight against Crash Man and Heat Man

In my mind, the robots wouldn't simply have one weakness. If that were the case, the movie would be too simple - once Mega had Metal Man's powers, he would use saw blades to defeat Bubble Man, Wood Man and Flash Man, and then go from there.

Another opportunity for the movie is to avoid the linearity of the games. Why go one boss at a time? You wouldn't always be that lucky. In this scenario, Mega Man would find Crash Man and Heat Man in a tunnel, deep within the earth. The two robots are drilling for fuel and minerals to prepare and send to Dr. Wily. Crash Man would obviously have missiles/mines to use, but the drills on his arms could also double as melee weapons. Heat Man (who, I must reiterate, would NOT look like a box+face), can shoot fire and use his cannon as a torch. I picture Mega Man accidentally bursting open an oil drum, which spills onto Crash Man, and when Heat Man fires at Mega, he uses Air Man's powers to blow the torch towards Crash Man, setting him ablaze.

Not sure how he'd kill Heat Man yet, but you get the idea.


It sure wouldn't look like this though...

The typical pre-Wily fight against all 8 robots

Seems like every Mega Man game has you fighting all the bosses again. But in this case, it wouldn't be one at a time.

Wily would surprise Mega Man, saying the typical "you can't stop me and my robots, blah blah blah" stuff, and then, proving his point, the 8 robots, REBUILT, would appear. The resulting brawl would use all of the powers in new and creative ways - maybe Mega didn't have the Wood Man powers when he first met Air Man, for example. There's also the option for Mega Man using the robots against each other - say Quick Man grabs Mega's arms from behind, and Heat Man charges up a blast, inches from Mega's face. So Mega Man struggles and finally kicks Heat Man's cannon to the side as the fire sprays, right onto Wood Man. Clutch.

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I guess that's it for today. Sorry for the incredibly long read.

There are a lot of games that, if done right, could be amazing as movies. Unfortunately, all the adaptations we get are sucky, but we can still dream, right?

If you dislike my ideas or would like to make your own, let me know! Some of the games we play are so creative and memorable that it kind of gets the imagination going. Even after beating Mega Man 2 a million times, it still sticks with me. What would a real Flash Man be capable of doing? What would a real Bubble Man look like? Will they create robots in my lifetime, and if they do, can I volunteer to be turned into one when I die, so that I can fight crime and kick ass?

Good shit.