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Rahmier's blog

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Rahmier avatar 8:51 PM on 02.12.2013  (server time)
Sewaddle is the most perverted pokemon.

Spencer, who runs Dtoid's sister channel Streamtoid on, is wrong about Sewaddle.

1. It has balls on its head.

The pokemon starts off with tackle and considering the animation is a lunge forward means that Sewaddle most basic attack is about touching other pokemon with its balls. How perverted is that?

2. Look into its eyes. It is thinking of doing perverted things to you.

This pokemon has its mouth agape, because it is thinking of how it can bound other pokemon with string shot and then rub its balls against it. You also know what nature is common and beneficial to Sewaddle? Naughty, the most perverted of the natures.

3. It will bone a flying scorpion bat thing.

Yea. It gets its rocks off thinking about doing it with one of the weirdest looking Pokemon made... Gilgar, a freaking scorpion bat thing that has sharp claws and a pointy tail. I can't even imagine why it wants to hook up with this one and that is why it is seriously perverted.

4. Its second evolution looks like a flasher.

Sewaddle second evolution, Swadloon is even more perverted. Sewaddle is an exhibitionist and into some weird pokemon form of S&M. You know one of the only direct stat down moves it can learn? Flash. As mentioned before this pokemon is naughty. Therefore it is a naughty flasher and I really don't want to know where string shot comes from on Swadloon.

5. Its final evolution happens when its trainer is a good friend...

The final evolution of Sewaddle is done when the trainer becomes friends with it and tells it that it needs to stop being a pervert and change. This is when Sewaddle can stop being a perv and comes to term with itself and finally transform into a bug pokemon that only kinda sucks, because it always has two 4x weaknesses.

You can speculate who is the bigger perv in the pokemon world, but I think you'll find it hard to top Sewaddle.

*I am not a pokemon player and had vast help writing this from a friend who is.

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