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About
I'm Randy.

Platformers are the best games of all time. I do, however, play everything else, too.

If God is up there, he will make it so I don't have to wait in five year breaks for a decent platformer (Mario 64, Sunshine, Galaxy) with the rare exceptions (Sly Cooper, Rayman).

I also don't swear.
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At long last, part four has arrived!










Good God, part three is here!








Part one can be found here.

Sure, I know what happens, but the more I watch, the more I realize how epic this is! The suspense kills me!



I made people laugh, therefore, this continues.








Let's face it: This whole "Rock Band is a platform" is the biggest lie in the world. I have no doubt we'll be seeing Rock Band 2 in November of this year. However, Rock Band is awesome, so why does it need a sequel?

Well, I'll tell you why. Rock Band is awesome, yes, but it's not quite there yet. If Harmonix wants it to become a "platform" for music, they need to make at least one more game and add more features. I have compiled a list of what Rock Band 2 could do to be the ultimate rocking experience and perhaps the last game Harmonix ever needs to make.

Backup Vocals

If you look me in the eye and tell me you don't scream "WANTED" while playing Bon Jovi, you're either lying or a mad man. Mad man! So, why not get a score bonus for it? If everyone is wearing an Xbox Live headset, they can sing during the chorus and get a score bonus (like the ending bonus or the unison bonus). Perhaps it would give you a slight overdrive bonus and help maximize your score. Everyone like the big rock endings, and I think this would make it even more fun.

Optional Keyboard Support

Everyone wants keyboard support. Everyone. You want to play "The Final Countdown," right? That's an awesome song. But why, Randy, do you want it optional? Well, my disembodied friend, I will tell you. There are a lot of songs that I would want to see in Rock Band that do not have keyboard in it. I don't want a game made for all instruments if they are going to make the entire list have some keyboard in it. I just don't want it. It'd be cool as an extra if you have an unwanted fifth person in the group, but I don't want to see absence of AC/DC because we have to make the keyboarders happy! They can die before they leave out AC/DC!

Rhythm Guitar

I fight back tears when I play "Detroit Rock City" and when I get to possibly the greatest solo and guitar harmony in history is played by only one person. How awesome would it be if that solo was done by two people? I can name tons of other songs ("One") that would benefit from rhythm guitar. Also, is that really how you spell rhythm? I looked it up, and that's what it said. That's crazy.

Online Band World Tour

I refuse to accept that this is the last Rock Band until this feature is implemented. I thought it was unacceptable, but... well, it is. I want it. We all want it. Make it happen.

Hearable Singer during Online Play

Another self-explanatory and much wanted feature. Moving on.

Rock Bong songs playable in Rock Band 2

If I've spent a zillion dollars on downloadable content, I want to play it in my new game. Will this happen? If not, I will slaughter a small child. I probably shouldn't say that on the internet. "Slaughter" is slang for "lure into my car with candy." So don't worry.

And the number one new feature...

MORE THAN THREE SONGS PER WEEK!

Seriously, come on. There is so much untapped music out there, so when you bring three songs a week and most of the time it's a pack of the same freakin' band, how are we going to play it? Put some more people on the team and make it happen.



These simple things can make Rock Band 2 the God of music games. Are there any features I left out that you would like to see? Let's hear it! MAKE YOUR VOICE HEARD MY FRIENDS!








I got bored and decided to do a knife run of the original Resident Evil. I was recording myself talk while I was playing, so obviously I had to talk more often to make it interesting.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Q-ym-4Lu4kE



Yes, I was very bored. Yes, I have a stuffy nose.

EDIT: Someone tell me how to put videos into my blog.








You may be asking yourself "How can a little piece of plastic kill someone?" Well, my friends, join me in a tale of PFJASODIJADFLKJASJDFOI STUPID PEDAL DIE DIE SALDFKJALGKVDAOGI DIE

I'm playing Rock Band with my taped up bass pedal. I figured it would at least last until my replacement gets here. I'm playing "...and Justice for All" on expert and half way through the song, a little piece breaks off. I'm not aware of it at first, but the whole time I'm doing serious bass drum kicks, the hard piece of plastic is carving into my bare foot. Through the power of rock, I felt no pain at the time. I kept playing until the thing snapped completely in half altogether.

My foot pedal is in two complete seperate pieces. The duct tape is the only thing holding the pedal onto the base. Meanwhile, my foot is bleeding. I could die now. Yep, I feel it. I'm dying.

I removed the blood-soaked duct tape to reveal that my pedal is also broken in another spot. This thing is in three pieces. Bull.

What the blue balls were they thinking when they made it out of thin plastic?

Could someone swear a bunch for me? I don't swear, but this deserves some profanity.

Also, if I'm not killed from blood loss (I'm getting weak...) then the part two of my Game of the Year post will be written. Just ignore my previous emo post and the fact that it's February of '08 now and just enjoy what I write you ungrateful pieces of poop.

Oh God... Must... stop... the bleeding...