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Scary Womanizing Pig Mask was a good friend. Wherever you've gone, I hope you're in a better place.

Beyamor's avatar fathered mine's love child at PAX East. It's ok though, 'cuz he gave me a picture of a Kirby as child support. Cheap bastard...

I inspired a song. (Thanks, Alphadeus!)

I am an element of Destructoid. (Thanks, Corduroy Turtle!)

10 things that may help you to understand me better.

I used to be the Cblog Recapper for Mondays. It was a good run.

May want to stay out of the old stuff. I didn't know what I was doing when I started here.
Like most other D-toiders I am male, 15 to 30 something, introverted to the point of social ineptitude, and grew up obsessing over whatever videogames I came across-- somewhat to the chagrin of my parents. I have about 9-10 gigs (yes, GIGS) of hard drive space devoted to game music, original soundtracks and remixes alike (Much love for OCRemix ). I've logged many, many hours into World of Warcraft, though I cancelled my account and have been "clean" for a couple of years now. I am a moderately slavering Nintendo fan because-- let's be fair... they were easily the biggest influence in my formative years. Because of this, it is my belief that Smash Bros. Brawl was created specifically for me. The fact that the rest of you may enjoy it is merely coincidence.

I am something of a stickler for both grammar and punctuation, and the use of "LOL" and its truncated ilk sometimes causes me to cringe. Fairly warned be ye, says I.

I work and go to college part time, which is a strain on both my finances and my free time. As such, my gaming collection isn't as up-to-date as I'd like. Somehow, I have managed to obtain a Wii, PS3, and a 360. My favorite console, however, is still the original NES My brother and I bought ourselves 20-odd years ago. I'm almost never more than 50 feet from my DS. I just replaced my computer's innards, and have found that I have more PC games to catch up on than time to do it in. I manage to stay current on most games by visiting friends with other systems, and the ancient art of borrowing. And that's a nice thing about games... if you miss `em you can go back to them years later and they're just the same as they ever were.

I tend to be more of a lurker than a contributor, but if I see something I think is particularly humorous or worthy, I do enjoy sharing.

E-mail: Qalamari {at} gmail {dot} com. Infrequently checked, you're better off sending me a PM on the site.

PSN: Qalamari. Haven't been on there much lately. =/

Steam: Qalamari. Steam sales are craaaazy! Always willing to help with Hat Fortress 2.

Xbox 360: Qalamari. You may be picking up on a theme here by now.

I love to see new Miis. If you add my Wii code, let me know! 5015-7633-5088-2932

Brawl code: 1289-7907-1240. PM me if you add it so I can hit you back.

Mario Kart Wii code: 0731-5535-7924. Same deal.

I had Pokemon codes here once, but I don't think anybody cared.
Following (93)  

It's been far too long since I've written anything here, and although this isn't an original story, it's nice to be blogging again now that the holiday craziness is in the past. Anyway. I saw this on Ctrl- Alt-Del this afternoon and thought it deserves as much exposure as possible.

Katherine Allen is a Blizzard employee, and in the spirit of the season is participating in a charity marathon for the Leukemia and Lymphoma Society. It's a great cause, but the reason this may be relevant to your interests is that if her target of $5500 is raised she'll be giving away a card with 300 months of WoW on it to one of the donators. That works out to 25 years of looting Murloc snouts and /dancing in Ironforge. Even if you don't win the grand prize there's a chance at a free year of World of Warcraft for three donators.

You can check out all the relevant information here. I know times are tough but it's a worthy cause and quite a valuable prize.


No, not my last Fallout puppet. I'm saving that. It may be hard to play the game next week with it wrapped around my thumbs, but screw it. I'm gonna try.

Bethesda is celebrating the end of the Penny Arcade comic run by giving away some of the leftover swag on their blog. All you need to do to enter is send an E-mail to and tell them which of the comics was your favorite. Prizes include the hilarious Vault Dweller's survival guide, seen below as well as a few of the Vault Boy puppets like the one I gave away last month. There was some fierce competition for that one, so I assume there'll be some interest in this. Good luck!


Hi all,

First of all, I'd like to thank everyone who entered my contest. I'm serious when I say I wish I had something for all of you-- sadly, in the end there can be only one winner, which means over 30 of you are going to be disappointed by what you read here.

Right up front, I'd like to thank The Golden Avatar for allowing me to use his Random Name Selector program to determine the winner of this contest. I was considering other ways of selecting someone randomly such as assigning everyone a number and using the /random function in WoW or throwing darts or something, but this worked out much better.

I apologize for the ad in the center of the video. I'm not very familiar with screen capture software, and this was the first one that I came across that was free. I'm on a budget, so that was an important consideration. I added a picture of the puppet to the top of the screen to push the ad out of the name list, so I hope everything is still legible. Without further ado, here's the winner!

Congratulations to the lucky winner. Just send me a PM with your contact info and I'll get your puppet shipped out as soon as possible.

I'd like to give KamikazeTutor and EternalDarkwing something special as a consolation prize. They both put in some extra effort on their avatars and I'd like to reward that. If you guys send me your contact info, I'll send you one of the cards that were passed out at the Fallout 3 demonstration.

It's made from a special cardboardium alloy I think.
It can be easily converted into a small home defense desktop nuclear device, or so it claims. You can see the whole thing here. I hope they won't mind me posting their full-size avatars here for everyone to see.

With any luck, I should be able to have some late PAX impressions up by the end of the week. Sadly I wasn't able to hang out with the Destructoid crew for the majority of the show-- a mistake I intend to rectify next year. Once again, congratulations to Dr. Rockso. If those of you who entered want to change your avatar back, (I know Necros' most recent one gives him a warm feeling) feel free to do so now. Thanks again for playing!


Make sure you hear what Gabe and Tycho start to say around about 1:58 or so, and keep an eye on the crowd.

This is it. Your chance to win a Fallout 3 puppet from PAX will soon be in the past. I wish I had one for everybody, but the sad fact of the matter is I only have one to give away. It's not too late to enter though, just click that link for the unbelievably easy entry requirements.

During the past week, I've been immensely entertained going through the C-blogs and seeing people's friend lists populated by a smattering of Vault Boy avatars. It almost made me feel like... a master... of something.


All kidding aside, I think the avatar contest has been a huge success and if I come across anything else cool to give away I'll probably do the same thing. The community's obvious love for the Fallout series has prompted me to pick up the original two games in the series--and from what little I've played, I think I now understand the enthusiasm surrounding everything even tangentially Fallout related. The feeling of absolute freedom to play in multiple, completely different yet valid ways is a refreshing change. Of course-- you all knew that already, that's why you want the puppet so bad, right?

None upside-down facing to the right? I must confess myself to be disappointed.

You have until 11:59PM Pacific time on Sunday night to enter. Avatars that are not somehow associated with the Vault Boy at the end of the contest are ineligible. I'll be posting the winner in my blog on Monday night. Good luck!


This was just about as awesome as it looks.

My last post was swiftly pushed off the front page, which I suppose I deserve for posting at midnight. Fortunately Mr. Zimmerman was good enough to post a link in his Scraps column last night. There are some really great avatars on display, and so far there are very few repeated.

As a reminder, the contest ends this Sunday at 11:59 Pacific time. To make sure as many people as possible have the opportunity to enter, Here's a link to the contest details. If you'd like to enter, please post in the other thread with your changed avatar. Good luck to you all!


I'm sure it's clear to even the most jaded Destructoid reader that PAX is widely considered to be pretty much the best thing ever. I've been meaning to write a bit about my experience at the show. Unfortunately for my plans, school started the day I returned, and work's been kicking me square in the ass for the last week. Still, as a couple of wise men once said, sometimes you just have to grow a pair and make time for blogging.

With that being said, I'm sure most people here couldn't care less about my pedantic ramblings and are here for the contest. Can't say I blame ya. Here's the deal.

Penny Arcade has been doing a special series of comics for Bethesda to promote the upcoming release of Fallout 3. There was an hourlong demonstration of the game on Saturday, and during the show everyone in the audience recieved a facedown card. The group I went up to Seattle with wasn't entirely composed of hardcore gamers, so I ended up with a couple of extra cards. These were redeemable at the Fallout booth for one of a variety of prizes, ranging from T-shirts to signed and framed posters to what I'm giving away here; a Fallout "Vault Boy" puppet.

It's still in the original bag for you obsessive types. These are currently going for between $20 and $75 on eBay.

It took a little while to figure out how best to give it away, but I think I've come up with an answer. It's simple, doesn't require much effort and to the best of my knowledge hasn't been done before. All you have to do to be entered into my contest is change your avatar to some form of the Fallout series' Vault Boy mascot and post in this thread. Only one post per person will be counted in this thread... you can post multiple times, but it won't help your chances of winning. I will choose one of the posts randomly at 11:59 PM Pacific time on Sunday, September 14th. Everyone is welcome to enter, but I'm a broke college student and can't really afford to send it internationally. If you want to enter and are from another country you're welcome to do so, but I may have to ask you to pay the shipping if you win.

To change your avatar, just click the "YOU" tab at the top of the site. Then click "My profile." There should be a button on screen that reads "Edit your profile." The top box will be where you should enter the URL for your avatar. I recommend copying the link for your current avatar and keeping it in a safe place for when the contest is over. During Workmeng Week I put my squid avatar at the top of my profile, for example.

The puppets were everywhere on the last day of the show.

I know lots of people track their friends' posts by their avatar, so I apologize in advance for the confusion this may cause. Unfortunately I don't have time or the experience in the Fallout universe to go through a lot of fan fiction or anything like that. Keep in mind, it's only for a week. Good luck!