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About Me




Scary Womanizing Pig Mask loved me. Wherever you've gone, I hope you're in a better place.

Beyamor's avatar fathered mine's love child at PAX East. It's ok though, 'cuz he gave me a picture of a Kirby as child support. Cheap bastard...



I inspired a song. (Thanks, Alphadeus!)


I am an element of Destructoid. (Thanks, Corduroy Turtle!)

10 things that may help you to understand me better.

I used to be the Cblog Recapper for Mondays. It was a good run.



May want to stay out of the old stuff. I didn't know what I was doing when I started here.
Like most other D-toiders I am male, 15 to 30 something, introverted to the point of social ineptitude, and grew up obsessing over whatever videogames I came across-- somewhat to the chagrin of my parents. I have about 9-10 gigs (yes, GIGS) of hard drive space devoted to game music, original soundtracks and remixes alike (Much love for OCRemix ). I've logged many, many hours into World of Warcraft, though I cancelled my account and have been "clean" for nearly a year now. I am a moderately slavering Nintendo fan because-- let's be fair... they were easily the biggest influence in my formative years. Because of this, it is my belief that Smash Bros. Brawl was created specifically for me. The fact that the rest of you may enjoy it is merely coincidence.

I am something of a stickler for both grammar and punctuation, and the use of "LOL" and its truncated ilk sometimes causes me to cringe. Fairly warned be ye, says I.



I work and go to college part time, which is a strain on both my finances and my free time. As such, my gaming collection isn't as up-to-date as I'd like. Somehow, I have managed to obtain a Wii, PS3, and a 360. My favorite console, however, is still the original NES My brother and I bought ourselves 20-odd years ago. I'm almost never more than 50 feet from my DS. I just replaced my computer's innards, and have found that I have more PC games to catch up on than time to do it in. I manage to stay current on most games by visiting friends with other systems, and the ancient art of borrowing. And that's a nice thing about games... if you miss `em you can go back to them years later and they're just the same as they ever were.

I tend to be more of a lurker than a contributor, but if I see something I think is particularly humorous or worthy, I do enjoy sharing.

E-mail: Qalamari {at} gmail {dot} com. Infrequently checked, you're better off sending me a PM on the site.

PSN: Qalamari. Haven't been on there much lately. =/

Steam: Qalamari. Steam sales are craaaazy! Always willing to help with Hat Fortress 2.

Xbox 360: Qalamari. You may be picking up on a theme here by now.

I love to see new Miis. If you add my Wii code, let me know! 5015-7633-5088-2932

Brawl code: 1289-7907-1240. PM me if you add it so I can hit you back.

Mario Kart Wii code: 0731-5535-7924. Same deal.

I had Pokemon codes here once, but I don't think anybody cared.
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3DS friend code:
Steam: Qalamari
Battle:
PSN: Qalamari
Mii: 5015 7633 5088 2932
Gamertag: Qalamari
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PAX 2010 episode 2: Attack of the Clones
Qalamari | 3:24 PM on 09.22.2010 8 comments


By now, I hope you've had a chance to read about the journey I brought megaStryke and GamesAreArt on as well as its tragic end. What I didn't tell you before was that I had thought in the back of my head that something like this might happen, so I secretly visited the clone world of Kamino prior to my journey.


Doesn't look as impressive as I remember it.

The clone masters regarded me strangely as I presented the DNA of my targets. It would have been expensive to make perfect clones, so I allowed them to remove the color from the end product. The clones themselves probably wouldn't be happy about that, but a little brainwork ensured that they'd never know the difference.


Oddly, the clones seemed to have no personality of their own. It was like they were a blank slate on one side. I knew that wouldn't do, so I lent them my voice, and a message to spread.



Now that I had my clones, I needed a place to distribute them, to allow them to blend in with the rest of society. What better place than the meeting hall of the robot's army?

My work done, all I could do was wait. I saw signs of my efforts in some intercepted missives, but very little direct communication. It seemed my clones were rather like fish eggs, hundreds distributed to the wild in the hopes that a few would survive.









It was all right though, as I had an ace up my sleeve. I talked to the leader of the clone masters, a grumpy, turtle-like fellow with the flair of a true artist. He crafted for me two very special clones, far surpassing their brothers' capabilities.





When the tragedy happened, I knew I couldn't keep these special clones to myself. And so they have been carefully packed in carbonite for the journey to their unwitting donors. As a matter of fact, the transport ship is on its way now.


Nope, still not that impressive.




All joking and strangeness aside, thank you to everyone who took the time to help me show mS and GAA around PAX. I'd especially like to thank GrumpyTurtle for his awesome drawings, requested over Twitter and prepared in advance. I'm sorry we didn't get to hang out more sir, and I definitely feel like I owe you something special next PAX. If anyone has pictures they've taken with the clones that they'd like added to the post, it's not too late! Just send them to my email or add them in the comments and I'll make sure they're inserted into the post.

I'd also like to take this opportunity to thank Destructoid for putting on a hell of a show at its PAX panel. It is because of my clone warriors here that I managed to snag the elusive "first post" at the Dtoid Live panel, and thus you, GamesAreArt and megaStryke, you are responsible for the completely awesome set of A30 Astro headphones that I took home. I was shocked and flustered at the outset, when I said who I was on the site and people cheered. That's certainly never happened to me before. And so thank you to everyone who was so nice to me at PAX, I had a great time meeting a lot of you, new faces and old. Thank you to Hamza, Niero, Jim, and anyone else involved with the amazing audio equipment I brought home. And thank you most especially to the community here who has accepted me and tolerates my half-assed ramblings on a regular basis.

And there's one more PAX blog I have yet to write. Sorry Sentry, but that one will have to wait for another day...



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6 comments | showing # 1 to 6
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Occams electric toothbrush's Avatar - Comment posted on 09/22/2010 16:36
Occams electric toothbrush
The symmetry of that goatee almost brings me to tears.

My beard and I salute it.
LawofThermalDynamics's Avatar - Comment posted on 09/22/2010 17:57
LawofThermalDynamics
CLONE ARMY!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Tony Ponce's Avatar - Comment posted on 09/22/2010 21:05
Tony Ponce
Oh no. Oh no! OOOOOH NOOOOOO!

OMIGOD!

My facial hair is AMAAAAAAAAAAAZIIIIIIIIIING!!!
Enkido's Avatar - Comment posted on 09/22/2010 21:29
Enkido
YOU MADE MORE THAN ONE! NOOOO, YOU HAVE DOOMED US AL-
Funktastic's Avatar - Comment posted on 09/22/2010 22:16
Funktastic
Much love Mr. Squid! ^_^ Although . . . SPEND MORE TIME WITH DTOIDERS NEXT YEAR1 =P
Elsa's Avatar - Comment posted on 09/23/2010 10:15
Elsa
very awesome drawings!!!
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