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Goodbye G4..meh to you Esquire - Destructoid

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UPDATE: Esquire has moved the Rebranding to the Summer instead of Next week.

So, this is it....

This is the final week of G4TV's Existence. Beginning next week, the rebranding begins. G4 will change to the Esquire Network.

I know very little about the changes, but here is what I got:

Original Programming:

There are only 2 shows that I know of that are "Original" from the new network.

The First one is "Knife Fight"
I know right?! It sounds really good, doesn't it? You are probably thinking of a bunch of guys fighting each other with knives, am I right?

I hate to disappoint you - but "Knife Fight" is a, wait for it.....Cooking Competition. Yes, a Cooking Competition. This guy is a chef (I forget his name) who invites his famous celebrity friends to judge the meals made by 4 chefs, who are all using weird-ass ingredients.

So....It's a lot like "Chopped" on the Food Network, but with an audience and no 10,000 Bucks to win.


The Second show is called "The Getaway"

Celebs travel to remote locations and enjoy the local cultures.

It sounds a lot like E!' "Wild on...", HDNet's (Now known as AXS TV) "Get Out!" and a Show on The Travel Channel called "Bridget's Sexiest Beaches (2009)", Starring Bridget Marquardt, except the hosts aren't in skimpy bikini's doing photo shoots.

*Sighs* how I miss those shows. "Get Out" was Crazy good. Should've recorded those episodes more often.

Anyway, Those are currently the ONLY TWO SHOWS THEY'VE DONE.

Cue up WTF Cat:



And we move on....to shows that will be on the network, after being on other networks.

The Shows that are gonna fill up the void the network currently has are shows that we have already seen before on other networks:

"Party Down", which was on the Starz Network for only 2 seasons before getting the axe, 20 episodes in all and "Parks and Recreation", which is still on NBC in the latter half of its fifth season.
Both shows will supposedly air in 3 hour blocks 8pm-11pm, so I have heard.

Ninja Warrior and American Ninja Warrior is going to be aired like a mofo this coming Monday and Tuesday, along with "Cops", and Movies that don't suck.

To fill up the late night hours, "Quantum Leap" and Knight Rider will run from midnight to 4am, and from 4am to 9am, Paid Programming and crappy Phone sex ads. Yay!

"Late Night With Jimmy Fallon" was supposed to air on the coveted 7pm EDT Time slot, but it won't show up until the Summer. I call the time slot coveted, because that is the time my beloved "Attack of the Show" aired.

The only thing that hasn't changed, is the Airing of the now defunct (And equally just as good as AOTS), XPlay, Which STILL gets aired at the 6:30pm Time Slot, along with the g4tv.com website (Although it is very barren right now).

So just as I, and most of you thought was going to happen, is actually going to happen.

G4 is going from a Channel that had only 2 really good shows on it, to a channel that is going to contain a mash-up of different shows that we have seen on other networks.

Will I be watching? I'd rather try swallowing a pocket knife in one gulp, with the blade sticking out.

I was thinking of downgrading my cable service to save some cash, now I have a valid reason to do so.

Goodbye G4. It was fun.

To help ease the pain of what you all just read, and to help ease the sting we are going to get next week, Here is a pic of Former Playboy Playmate Sara Jean Underwood, dressed as a stormtrooper, washing a car:



That's Better.

Laters.
Photo Photo



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