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I'm a twenty-something guy who currently lives in Chicago. I spend the majority of my days making plans to do things and then never following through with them (finish college, study Hapkido, take a photography class... so on). These plans usually get set to the side because of more pressing issues like watching Kung Fu movies, playing video games, and becoming obsessed with random hobbies for a week and then forgetting them.

My love for video games is a strange tale. See growing up I lived with my mom who was an alcoholic emotional wreck, this means that I didn't have nice things (such as the newest video games). My brother Rick lived with my father and did get the nice things. I guess now I'm making up for lost time one owned noob* at a time.

Currently I spend a lot of time playing Counter-Strike:Source and day dreaming about the good old life swallowing days of Ultima Online, the only MMO where you could kill someone without provocation, steal all their crap, then cut up their corpse and keep pieces of it as a trophy. Now THAT is a manly MMO.

*These are not always actual "human" players. Noobs can also be the in game characters which you totally knock crap out of in one way or another i.e. "Man, the Hammer Brothers are noobs".

Hey Paras0mnia, welcome to our Community Blogs!

Unlike a regular blog, where you're out alone in the web wilderness, destructoid will publish your story instantly to a directory shared by our readers. Great blogs are voted up, and you'll soon earn followers. "Failblogs", the opposite of awesomeness, we can do without. As such, we want to help you make the best first impression:

Checklist for Not Sucking:

1) Upload an avatar CHECK!

2) Write a brief bio


3) Publish your first blog (SCARY!)

It's not so scary. However, be mindful of a few things. A good blog is intended to be a complete article, have entertainment value of some kind, and formatted nicely. If you toss a blog up that looks like a quickly thrown-together email with no photos or care you'll never earn readers, and unlikely ever get your blog promoted to our home page.

Here's an example of a FAILBLOG:
Oh hey I'm new here wuz up I've been reading the site for 99 years and this is my first blog! I like tacos! Nice to meet everyone!!! -Niero
Silly rabbit, blogs are not forums! While enthusiasm is greatly appreciated, that's hardly a valid blog post or even a complete paragraph. Even if your intentions are in the right place, this is what we call a "fail blog". Don't be that guy.

If that's all you want to say, it's better suited for fast-paced conversation in our home page comments or even our forums. Blogs are complete thoughts. They should be able to stand alone. When you're ready to talk about an interesting topic, in 1-2 paragraphs and ask readers to respond to your thoughts then you're ready to blog. Got it?

Don't spam the blogs.

One last thing -- be mindful that this is a 'shared' space, so don't push a bunch of blogs together one after the other. After you publish, try commenting and following other bloggers before you blog again to allow people to check your story out, and post new stories as well.

If you are copying and pasting from another blog, please take some time to personalize it for this community. Nobody likes copy-pasta, it's spammy.

Here's a few more blogging tips from the boss of us. Ready to go?

Click here to write your greatest blog!

This message will disappear when your profile is 100% complete. Happy blogging! If you have any questions, reach us anytime at

- The destructoid Community Team