When I was delivered, I cleared my nostrils and spanked my own ass. Later that day, I invented a silicone based protein that cured world hunger and brought about world peace. I owned a multi billion dollar corporation by the time I was six, and you can too!
I won the Nashville chili cook off, home on the prairie mother fucker. Big trucks and little women (I take em skinny dipping). You want the life I'm living? Who the fuck you kidding. I circumcised myself with my bare hands. Grizzly Adams mother bitches.
I don't need an elevator, ill take the stairs. I wrestle alligators, I ain't no square. I don't need toilet paper, Ill use my hands... and wipe 'em on your face, cause I'm the man.
I once slapped a guy so hard his mom lit on fire.. and that bitch lives in Alaska. You figure it out. So you see my little bitches, if you buy my one minute and 48 second seminar, you too could become the champion of the world.
I'm joking, you're a loser. When I take off my shirt, even old ladies flock to me. I'm like Don Johnson you fucks.
I am a mother fuckin Binge Gamer, check it out sometime.
Above is my baby. It is in no way a Turning Point gaming rig, in fact, it isn't a game rig at all. I can do most emulators, as long as it isn't N64 or above. It does surprise me by running Crazy Taxi just fine, which is great because what games need to be played more than Crazy Taxi? None (except of course for Turning Point).
The model is a Dell Latitude C610. It has one of those nifty red nubs in the middle of the keyboard which seem to be lacking on some newer model laptops I see. It is necessary, touchpads blow (I keep a mouse handy in my laptop bag though).
512mb ram (upgraded from the 256 it came with)
20gb hard drive
14.1 display (1024x768 max resolution)
ATI Mobility RADEON M6P 16MB
Featured in the above picture is the fact that I have no disk drives. I do have a dvd drive and a floppy drive somewhere in my room, but for the most part they go unused, I ended up having instead to get an additional battery because the original battery can maybe pull 2 hours of use tops :(
Also you can see my special WaveLAN wireless card. This is the equivalent to an Orinoco card, which was awesome back in its hay day to scan routers and break passwords. It was compatible with so many programs. Now it is just a very solid wireless card.
Above is sadness. As I watch my porn, my penis is constantly distracted by that red line. Sometimes a blue and/or green line will show up just an inch to the right, I have no clue why, but it isn't always there. The red line though.. oh, that is always there.