I am the Community Blog Manager for Destructoid. I am also the resident Resplendent Black Grandmother. My mind is broken glass and my heart is swollen and corpulent, like a cheeto left in a puddle of Diet Coke.
Well that certainly sounded dramatic.
I, with the full support of the Shadow Council, have taken it up myself to hand out decoder rings to all new members here on the C-blogs. I also like handing out little bonus gifts as well depending on what's in the trunk of my car on any given day. I do this because I have things growing inside me. Dark, twisted things that need love. So let me love you.
This is a past banner of mine that was made by fellow Dtoider and sexting partner Char Aznable. I have tattooed this on my heart. My apologies for it being cut off but I don't know how to make it smaller and screaming at the screen hasn't worked yet.
This is a picture Science Jesus and kind-voiced personal savior Beyamor drew while thinking about me. It's my old avatar but it still rings true in the hearts of men and beasts alike. I bet he wasn't wearing pants when he made it. A man can dream, right?
I was recently gifted with a Dtoid card. Its hard to put into words how much this means to me that I am finally a playing card.
I am the God King of my Heart.
Here are some pictures of things I like. I hope you like them too.
So letís see.† Itís been a while since I wrote one of these.†Whatís new with me?† Iíve been engaging in all kinds of media lately.†
Side note: That could be a really fancy way of saying looking at porn.†
Iíve been playing a silly amount of Final Fantasy IV: A Realm Reborn.† Itís a lot of fun.† Iíve also been spending a lot of time on Youtube.† You have to understand that for a fella like me, Youtube is literally a dream come true.† All those weird tv shows, movie moments, late night infomercials and random facts I have crammed in my memory have been cataloged and archived on Youtube.† I just have to dig into the cannibal punch bowl I call my skull and pull out a name or title or phrase and Youtube can help me re-live the joy.† Itís a wonderful thing for someone like me.† In the spirit of that idea, I wanted to share some stuff I have found on Youtube that has brought me no small amount of joy.† So I hope that you find some pleasure and smiles in these videos.
Richard ďKing TittyĒ Wagner - Tristan und Isolde - Prelude and Liebestod †
There's something so sublime and true about this piece.† Its speaks to my heart and the first time I heard it I teared up and was filled with happiness.
Frederic ď2 KoldĒ Chopin - Op. 9, No. 1 in B-flat minor †
Chopin is my favorite pianist and his music is this beautiful gut punch to me.† Its sad, fragile and hopeful all at once and is a constant companion in my waking world.
Starcat Ė Ghosts †
I'm pretty big into the New Wave Neo Retro Synth stuff, whatever you want to call it.† It's simultaneously exciting and new and familiar to me.† This song just stood out from the rest though.† Something about the pace of it and that low bass sound in the background.† Feels like a loving electric heartbeat to me.
Alphadeus Ė Love, Lost, Live, Love
Our own Alphadeus is a musicially talented fella and this piece by him has really stuck in my brain as of late.† Its somber and reflective and kind.† I've been listening to it a lot before I fall asleep.† If you haven't had a chance to, check out his youtube page and give the man's work a listen.† Its well worth your time.†
†BEAUTIFUL THINGS †
Giant Fish Pond in Abandoned Bangkok Mall
I feel like this is something right out of The Last of Us. Here in this abandoned mall is this thriving fish pond teeming will all kinds of beautiful fish.† Its amazing to me.
8 Hours of Nature Sounds
I love the water.† Mostly rivers and streams and brooks.† The ocean is too big and has krakens in it.† I don't trust it.† Sure, 8 hours may seem a bit excessive but I have put this on and read some comics or thumbed through an art book and found myself completely relaxed.† That's a rarity in my waking world.
Bird of Paradise Mating Dance
The first time I saw this footage I stood up and yelled "fuck that" at the tv.† This is real magic and my tiny mammalian brain cannot comprehend the demon wizard powers this bird possesses.
Artist Sees Lover
Marina Abramovic and Ulay started an intense love story in the 70s, performing art out of the van they lived in. When they felt the relationship had run its course, they decided to walk the Great Wall of China, each from one end, meeting for one last big hug in the middle and never seeing each other again. At her 2010 MoMa retrospective Marina performed ĎThe Artist Is Presentí as part of the show, a minute of silence with each stranger who sat in front of her. Ulay arrived without her knowing it and this is what happened.† This always leaves me speechless.
VIDEO GAMES †
A Complete play through of Phantasmagoria
I've been on a kick of watching game play throughs lately.† This was the video that kicked it off for me.† I really miss those old FMV games.† They were cheesy but really tried something new and they have a charm that is undeniable.† Though I have to say that its really hard to find videos of just the game.† More often than not its some jackass heehawing over the video.† Most annoying.
Def Jam: Fight for New York Ė All Blaziní finishers and taunts
This is a fighting game where you can play as Henry Rollins.† Henry Rollins is in this game as a playable character.† So naturally its one of my favorite fighting games ever.† The cartoonish yet brutal nature of these finishers leaves me wandering if the rappers had any input into what they move would be.† If so, then some of these guys are really into pulverizing testicles.†
Trapt Ė All Dark Illusions
I love the Deception series and Trapt always stuck in my mind for the Dark Illusion super moves (so to speak) that you could pull off if you did the right combination of traps in a room.† They are pretty gruesome, even if the graphics are a bit dated now.† My favorite is still the giant music box trap.† Grinding gears.† How horrifying.
The Ballad of Mike Haggar
The internet has done much to praise and honor the man that is Mike "my biological father" Haggar.† This and that picture of him suplexing a shark tie for the best in my opinion.
This is maybe the best commercial ever made?†
This one is a bit of a nostalgia pick but I remember getting this board game for Christmas one year and freaking the fuck out.† My friends and I played the game maybe twice then we just watched the tape over and over.† Turns out there was a whole bunch of board games made that had an "interactive" video element like this.† Youtube of course has all of them and I'm currently watching the Star Wars one in sections.
The best of Rude Jude from Jenny Jones
As a younger man, Jenny Jones was my favorite talk show and quite possibly still be.† Between My Sexy Teen Needs to Come Clean to Now I'm Hot and You're Not, the show never failed to produce a classier version of the Jerry Springer show.† One of the returning personalities was "Rude Jude".† He was a guy named Jude who was pretty great at throwing shade on guests, especially when they came on proclaiming such phrases as "Don't hate!" and "You don't know me!".† This was well before South Park made that a running joke.†
Lisa Frank: A Parody by Upright Citizens Brigade
There's a surprisingly small amount of humor stuff based on Lisa Frank and what is there could be considered slim pickings.† However, this video cracked me up as I could see if being how it all went down.† Of course, now we know this wasn't the case but I like how it's part tribute, part Lifetime Original Movie and all bears wearing top hats.
Le Cochon Dansuer
There's an unawareness that videos like this have.† Viewed today, its more of a David Lynch short film but in 1907, it was a playful, whimsical music hall routine made to show folks at nickelodeon theaters.† I love the pig costume.† Its fat body, thick limbs and those rolling eyes and wagging tongue are evocative of Grimm's Fairy Tales but set on the Vaudeville stage.† The video feels innocent and playful but there is an undeniable sense that the pig could eat her at any moment if it wanted to.