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So this is my blog. I collect religious art, taxidermy things and play video games old and new. I've been playing video games for over twenty years and for better or worse have begun to develop perspective on them. Heaven help me. I, with the full support of the Shadow Council, have taken it up myself to hand out decoder rings to all new members here on the C-blogs. I also like handing out little bonus gifts as well depending on what's in the trunk of my car on any given day. I do this because I have things growing inside me. Dark, twisted things that need love. So let me love you.

Forever.

Oh snap. I Tumbl(r). Oh snap. I Tweet.

This is a past banner of mine that was made by fellow Dtoider and sexting partner Char Aznable. I have tattooed this on my heart. My apologies for it being cut off but I don't know how to make it smaller and screaming at the screen hasn't worked yet.

This is a picture Science Jesus and kind-voiced personal savior Beyamor drew while thinking about me. It's my old avatar but it still rings true in the hearts of men and beasts alike. I bet he wasn't wearing pants when he made it. A man can dream, right?

Here are some pictures of things I like. I hope you like them too.

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PSN: Mother_Meat
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Gamertag: TheHumboldtKid

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Frustration and Infatuation: Demon's Souls and Patience
Occams electric toothbrush \| 1:50 PM on 10.22.2009	6 comments

28 times. 28 screaming, teeth gnashing times I have died on the first level of Demon's Souls. I have chain-smoked, binge drank and even started to put it up on ebay because of my rage at this damn game. However, through all the blind rage, empty beer cans and nicotine stained fingers, I keep playing. This tiny little voice in my head tell me to be patient. That I can do it. For some insane reason, I listen to that voice.

Now I'm not a bad gamer. Not amazing, win a bunch of tournaments type but I know enough to be competent at most any game I decide to play and would dare say I'm good at a select few titles. However, I go through the first level in Demon's Souls and sooner or later I get killed...abruptly and brutally. Of course it's my fault. I didn't have my shield up. I didn't dodge. I was too drunk and there were two of my character on the screen but damn....repeating the entire level. The entire fucking level. It kills me. It makes me want to go to Atlus HQ and burn it to the ground then salt the earth. But I'm not quitting....yet.

I'm going to try. I've decided that once a night I will try to beat the first level. Once a night is about all I can muster at this point. Controllers aren't free and punching a wall is about is impressive as driving an H3 to me so once a night is my limit. Maybe I put it down after I beat that first level. Maybe I continue through and find that Nirvana state that a lot of you have seemed to reach with Demon's Souls. I have no fucking clue.

All I know is that I caught the briefest glimpse of what all of you have seen in this game last night when I beat the blue-eyed knight for the first time. I know, I know the knight isn't a boss or all that tough but that cunt was responsible for at least 10 of those 28 deaths. Through all the shit I have eaten with this game that moment meant something to me. It was....progress? Hope? Dumb luck? I don't like to ponder it too much.

Even if I never beat the game, I will beat the first level. This is me being determined. Also, that reminds me, I'm out of beer.

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6 comments | showing # 1 to 6

JACK of No Trades

Lol, the game isn't that hard. Take your time and think things through. There are multiple ways to defeat the enemies. Im on my third playthrough. The game is like crack.

Occams electric toothbrush

I think that's the rub, it is not that hard. I'm just caught in some Twilight Zone time loop of frustration and alcoholism. It's kooky.

de BLOO

Yawn.

ChronosWing

Try a different class, I recommend Royal.

protomark

If you can't beat the first level of this game, you are a pretty awful gamer.

Sorry.

Occams electric toothbrush

I forgive you.

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Living the dream since March 16, 2006