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11:59 PM on 06.10.2008

Mistakes of Internet Gaming: Pirates of the Caribbean Online

Making my daily rounds about the internet I happened upon something wonderful, something magical, something....too Disney for it's own good: Pirates of the Carribean Online. I love Pirates just as much as the next guy, or anyone between the ages of 1-an infinitesimal amount, and MMOs --yes, it's an MMO-- but there was something about this abomination that I couldn't shake.

The entry fee of nothing only led me astray to how horrible it really is. Every single player character is hideously deformed when compared to any game character, with my character's head almost half the size of good 'ol Orly's. This is only a bit of the horror that is Pirates' graphics. Designed to be accessible to people with computers as old as Windows 98 these are the blandest textures (does it even have them?) you'll ever see. I could swear the ground was one solid color...mind you combat is fun and instantly accessible, bloodless to boot for its E rating, which could be the reason for the lack of decent visuals. Pirate NPCs from the movie look cool, just don't expect to be swatting away wenches anytime soon, your character's no Jack Sparrow.

I always believe that gameplay overrides graphics anyday, and good gameplay would've excused this game from premanent residence at the bottom of Davey Jones' locker (sorry, couldn't resist) but nothing about this game is smooth, spare the conversations with NPCs. As you run around nothing about your character flows, as if several frames are constantly missing. Not only does this happen to you, but apparently everyone else, like a teleportation gone horrible wrong, slowly catapulting you towards the watery grave.

I had a slight thought at the back of my head saying "Oh goodie, Pirates! Now I can quit WoW and play something even more awesome until a ninja MMO comes out!" but no, and you shouldn't either. In fact, remove that dirty encrusted thought straight out of there and bury it in a chest somewhere far underground, then take the map for that chest and eat it, so that once you die it'll be released and then everyone can desecrate your corpse for it. Oh, and here's a kicker, if you want more content -- who doesn't need more crap?-- then you can pay a monthly fee for more ships! more weapons! more clothes! Oh, and when you get to level 8, you HAVE to pay if you wish to keep on playing, making it no more than a demo and a tease. Save your money, head towards Pirates of the Burning Sea and get your Yaaargh! on. If you can stand getting your dreams crushed, then by all means ( take that url and let it destroy your soul as it has to mine. Remember, there's a reason why we didn't know it was released until now.   read

9:00 PM on 03.07.2008

Taking advantage of the holy gaming

I'm new to the dtoid community blogs so please excuse my obvious n00bness, but
something occured to me a few days ago that I felt I had to post about, and it kind of went
down like this.

Leaving supper from university, calling dad to let him know i'm on my way home.
Me- "Hey dad I'm on my way home now"
Dad - "Alright, I'll see you soon. Hey, what do you think of the site "Gamer's Sphere"?"
Me- "Never heard of it. Never went to that site." Little did i know...
Dad- "Well I just bought the url for it. I don't know what I'm going to use it for but this
game industry is so big that I really want to take advantage of it."

Now, my dad works in trucking, and knows about as much about gaming as I do about the
anatomy of a rainbow, so what I got from this was "HEY YOU'RE GONNA MAKE ME A
WEBSITE AND PUT STUFF ON IT". Other than needless ranting about my father and his
pointless spending, the entire thing made me wonder just how many people are taking
advantage of us gamers just to make a quick buck. I'm well aware of how many brands are
being fused into games and of the services which charge to play games -- here's lookin' at
you, Xbox Live.

There's no denying that the music and media industries have become corrupted by wealth,
but are we soon to follow? Do we even mind that we're having advertisements and services
charges shoved down our throats just because some big shots thought that it would be an
alright admissions price? I'd like to believe that the videogame industry is pure and all that,
although when it comes down to it we're on a slippery slope towards the same disgusting
filth that's happened elsewhere.

As a passing note --as I'm too lazy to rework this into my entry-- I'd like to add that annual
incarnations of games in a series are killing...everything. They're no good for the series or
the gamers who feel cheated out of their money when they buy the same game every
year, taking their chances on whether it's become slightly better or worse.   read

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