I've said it before and I'll say it again, I suck at video games. Now, maybe to a more casual gamer, I wouldn't suck as bad, and probably pretty decent. But, for the amount of games and time spent gaming that I have done, I am horrible.

2 weeks ago, as pretty much every person within the nearest 7 universes did, I bought brawl. I sucked at melee (what a surprise), but I actually started to get pretty good with this new game. I practiced alot and started to do pretty well online with Ike. I actually got good enough that I thought I could qualify the game as one of the few I did not suck at. That was until yesterday.

I have a friend who, while not really a casual gamer per-say, is definetly not hardcore. He'll play the latest FPS's or sports games, but he does not venture very far out of his gameiverse (this is now officially a word). So when he came over to hang out, I thought I'd show him Brawl and impress him with my dazzling skills. I did everything I could to make him as bad as possible: I gave him the wiimote without nunchuck for controls, I had him play as Kirby, he hadn't even ever played the fucking game before. Yet, through sheer button mashery, he beat me 16 OUT OF 20 TIMES!!! After throwing him out of my house in a fit of rage I decided that there were only three things that I could do. One, obviously was to commit suicide. This however, was not a convenient option as I had to study for a history exam. The next option was to give up video games and spend my life as a nomad wondering the country looking for food, but I'm not a big fan of walking long distances. So, I went with my third option which was to whine about it in a C-blog.


What an asshole