Things like time that are in Mass Effect.

Okay, so I haven't played Mass Effect 2 yet. God I feel like a loser just typing that. It's not something I'm proud of.

I've actually played it, but I haven't played it all the way through. I've played through about three missions. Here are some of the things in those missions:

#1. Shepard, male or female, is required by the Illusive Man to keep pictures of her squadmates pinned to her ass, regardless of whether she could simply turn and look them in the face if she were to forget.

Here's a sexy picture of a woman's ass in Mass Effect bodypaint.


#2. Everything must be highlighted, no matter how irrelevant to Shepard's task. Said "things" are surrounded with an orange or blue virtual box. Things you'd never notice or need to, Bioware wants you to look at them anyway. They really want you to look at them. Especially the fragile crates.

#3. Likewise, all enemies must be bounded in bright colored half-circles. No guessing here. You know where those sneaky bastards are hiding.

#4. Everyone Shepard meets as well as all opportunities for interaction should be identified at the top of your eyeballs, and I mean you the stalker staring down from your recliner at Shepard and her crew. You, the guy whose eyes get bloodshot whenever Shepard gets hurt. Oh, you checked in a mirror and they weren't really bloodshot? Well good job ruining the illusion. Jeez.

#5. Sheperd, despite being a partly mechanized person, will never break into any more than a walkish jog unless under serious duress. I see the sights Shepard. They're very pretty. Can we go now. I need to walk the dog here in a minute. Don't you have somewhere to be too?

So that's it. Maybe one day I'll start again to play it and some days later I'll finish it.