Hey again people,

I have just had my before bed fap session and I am ready to lye down in bed and play Lost Odyssey (That word is so hard to spell). But before I do that, I need to address something that really pissed me off tonight while playing Call of Duty 4...In fact, it pisses me off all the time, and not just on CoD 4 but also with any other Xbox Live experience.



T-Bagging I can handle, in fact I piss myself when it gets done to me, not just when I do it to others. Shooting the body of the player you just killed, fair enough, I would do the same thing over Xbox Live and in real time War. I can handle those things. But one thing I cannot handle, is fuckheadism. Now some people may think that T-bagging and Corpse shooting fall into that catagory...ooohh no it doesn't and I'll explain to you why.

There are some things that is faaaaaaar more moronical than T-bagging and Corpse Shooting put together, here is a list of them, play close attention because if this is you...I will find you one day and rape your wife (current or future).

Fuckheadism Defined

1 - The Great American Mouth: Fuckheads who act like smug cunts and mouth off as soon as you enter the game lobby, just to try and get a rise out of you. Fair go, you have obviously played a few games and won and are keen to rape the next victem. Do that! Thats what the game is for, for fuck sake. However, when I get into a lobby and the first thing I hear after I try and socialise is "I fucken hate poms, your going to die!", I tend to want to side with Bin Laden and blow up America for being so fucken stupid (and trust me, I wouldnt say the whole of America if the whole of American Xbox live wasn't MOSTLY filled with dickheads). First off, I am not British, I am Australian. You calling us English is like people mistaking you for Canadians, its insulting. Secondly, youre all going to die of AIDS. And don't even get me started on how much your ego and mouth go off when you have a clan of commited fuckwits there with you. Digitally backed up by a few good men...or should I say a few good beer bellied Mongolian rabbit fuckers.
Note: I said MOSTLY, meaning not all Americans are like this, but by my estimation there is a 3 to 1 ratio in my favor.



2 - Clanboys of Digital Dick Sucking: If you win a game, good for you, at the end of it I will say "Good game guys, you played fucken great!". You don't need to suck each others digital dicks and shower yourselves in your own glorified semen. And you don't need to let me know how much I lost by, it tells me on the screen I am looking at for fuck sake. Fair go, if your life is that pathetic that the highlight of your day is bragging about your wins over Xbox Live, then go right ahead, in the end that just makes you the arsehole that needs to be raped with a knife and from here all I can do is pray that it happens.



3 - Bailers and Failers: Don't report me just because I decide to be led in by your faggotry and reply with something witty that you couldn't possibly understand nor come back at, so the only real solution you have is to report me. Fuck you. If you are that pathetic to start a verbal war and back down only to dob me in like a fucken pre-schooler would, then you deserve to have somebody come and smash your Xbox over your mothers face after feeding a baseball bat up her anus and using her as a giant icy-pole stick puppet.

4 - The Stalkers: Don't send me messages after I leave the game because I can't handle your stupidity, I left to get away from you, so stop chasing after me. If you want to organise a date I'm sure your sister is in the next room applying genital antiperspirant and waxing her moustache in the hope that you will ask her. And if you don't have a sister, us a pet and pretend you do.

Not a personal attack at OXM Dan, but he looks like he is in the middle of saying "FUCKER!"


Listen I know not all of you apply to this moron way of gaming life, and I humbly apologize if you have taken offence to this and you are not in any of these catagories...wait, no I dont. Because if you do take offence, that means you are part of these catagories because you wouldn't be offended if you didn't have anything to do with these. So be just be warned sonny...I am coming to American for a trip next year, and if I ever do meet you (which is unlikely but possible) I am going to stuff a heap of flowers up your arse and shove a bee hive down your throat. And don't be surprised if you come home and you see that I am wearing your Mum (sorry, Mom) as a hat...and not just her head, I'm talking a hat made from her entire body, what part of her wrapped around my head is left up to your imagination.

I'm done being an abusive arsehole now, I think I just needed to get that out for all the times I have kept my mouth shut (which isn't much).

I love gaming, I love Xbox, so don't be a fuckwit and ruin it for me.

Much love & respect (obviously)
Moses

P.S- I am sending in Bruce Willis to break your spine...if he can kill at Jet, he can kill you. You have been warned...



and this guy...who looks high as a kite